Jolene
@jkmbassoon.bsky.social
Feral Bassoonist
This is a Leroy Anderson Stan account
This is a Leroy Anderson Stan account
Picture it! Texas, 2025: I have a couple of old toothbrushes in a drawer I use for cleaning. Have never been used for mouths. But one of them is electric
Me: hand me that toothbrush in the drawer, please?
BF: Um.. which one?
Me: oh… theeee…acoustic one?
BF: hands me the non-electric toothbrush
Me: hand me that toothbrush in the drawer, please?
BF: Um.. which one?
Me: oh… theeee…acoustic one?
BF: hands me the non-electric toothbrush
December 9, 2025 at 2:14 PM
Picture it! Texas, 2025: I have a couple of old toothbrushes in a drawer I use for cleaning. Have never been used for mouths. But one of them is electric
Me: hand me that toothbrush in the drawer, please?
BF: Um.. which one?
Me: oh… theeee…acoustic one?
BF: hands me the non-electric toothbrush
Me: hand me that toothbrush in the drawer, please?
BF: Um.. which one?
Me: oh… theeee…acoustic one?
BF: hands me the non-electric toothbrush
It literally says in my bio that this is a Leroy Anderson stan account.
‘Tis the best season of the year!
‘Tis the best season of the year!
December 9, 2025 at 2:55 AM
It literally says in my bio that this is a Leroy Anderson stan account.
‘Tis the best season of the year!
‘Tis the best season of the year!
Finding a musician sacked out on a couch underneath her coat in a green room, with high heels splayed on the ground, is peak gig-mas time. I hope it is a blessed nap, queen.
December 7, 2025 at 12:31 AM
Finding a musician sacked out on a couch underneath her coat in a green room, with high heels splayed on the ground, is peak gig-mas time. I hope it is a blessed nap, queen.
OMG there are so many recordings of Messiah, and so many damned Pub editions. And some of them are numbered. Some of them have titles with cuts, and none of them line up. How the HELL am I supposed to know what chorus this is, if all you give me is numbers? I just want to practice, dangit!
December 2, 2025 at 3:47 AM
OMG there are so many recordings of Messiah, and so many damned Pub editions. And some of them are numbered. Some of them have titles with cuts, and none of them line up. How the HELL am I supposed to know what chorus this is, if all you give me is numbers? I just want to practice, dangit!
In another, better world, Madame Morrible was played by Cher
November 27, 2025 at 6:44 PM
In another, better world, Madame Morrible was played by Cher
I was making reeds, and I watched the new Netflix Christmas-romcom “Ex-mas. It was… stupid… but I was impressed with how Alicia Silverstone and Melissa Joan Hart look like they are 49. They don’t look like they’ve had crazy amounts of work done.
November 19, 2025 at 4:40 AM
I was making reeds, and I watched the new Netflix Christmas-romcom “Ex-mas. It was… stupid… but I was impressed with how Alicia Silverstone and Melissa Joan Hart look like they are 49. They don’t look like they’ve had crazy amounts of work done.
Scott Cantrell is such a little welp. How does anyone pay for the Dallas Morning News just to get this loser’s opinion on literally anything?
November 12, 2025 at 5:16 AM
Scott Cantrell is such a little welp. How does anyone pay for the Dallas Morning News just to get this loser’s opinion on literally anything?
Reposted by Jolene
Can we at least give Canada a break on the tariffs now?
November 2, 2025 at 4:19 AM
Can we at least give Canada a break on the tariffs now?
Ugh. So sad for the Jays. They put up the craziest fight. What a great string of games.
November 2, 2025 at 4:25 AM
Ugh. So sad for the Jays. They put up the craziest fight. What a great string of games.
Welp, UNT Wind Studies program and Wind Symphony will never be the same. Crazy how time flies in this world
October 29, 2025 at 5:38 PM
Welp, UNT Wind Studies program and Wind Symphony will never be the same. Crazy how time flies in this world
Wikipedia started displaying a table of contents to the left of their articles when viewing on a computer, and damn… whoever did that is a real one, dawg.
a man in a suit and tie is saying thank dude
ALT: a man in a suit and tie is saying thank dude
media.tenor.com
October 28, 2025 at 6:36 PM
Wikipedia started displaying a table of contents to the left of their articles when viewing on a computer, and damn… whoever did that is a real one, dawg.
Reposted by Jolene
I know it’s too much to expect them to know their history, but if the American Revolution had a motto, it definitely would not have been “immigrants go home.”
It would have been “get your fucking soldiers out of our cities.”
It would have been “get your fucking soldiers out of our cities.”
October 28, 2025 at 1:48 PM
I know it’s too much to expect them to know their history, but if the American Revolution had a motto, it definitely would not have been “immigrants go home.”
It would have been “get your fucking soldiers out of our cities.”
It would have been “get your fucking soldiers out of our cities.”
It’s because he sings the Star Spangled Banner in 4/4. I swear, that’s what cursed us!
*shakes fist at god*
IF YOU SING THE STAR SPANGLED BANNER IN 4/4 IT CURSES ANY WHO LISTEN! MAY IT BE SUNG IN 3/4 ONLY!
A pox on all your houses 🧙♀️
*shakes fist at god*
IF YOU SING THE STAR SPANGLED BANNER IN 4/4 IT CURSES ANY WHO LISTEN! MAY IT BE SUNG IN 3/4 ONLY!
A pox on all your houses 🧙♀️
October 28, 2025 at 6:00 PM
It’s because he sings the Star Spangled Banner in 4/4. I swear, that’s what cursed us!
*shakes fist at god*
IF YOU SING THE STAR SPANGLED BANNER IN 4/4 IT CURSES ANY WHO LISTEN! MAY IT BE SUNG IN 3/4 ONLY!
A pox on all your houses 🧙♀️
*shakes fist at god*
IF YOU SING THE STAR SPANGLED BANNER IN 4/4 IT CURSES ANY WHO LISTEN! MAY IT BE SUNG IN 3/4 ONLY!
A pox on all your houses 🧙♀️
Ok, athletes have their rituals that they think help them win games.
Do any of you classical musicians out there have any talismans or rituals you use for performances or auditions?
Do any of you classical musicians out there have any talismans or rituals you use for performances or auditions?
October 19, 2025 at 3:59 AM
Ok, athletes have their rituals that they think help them win games.
Do any of you classical musicians out there have any talismans or rituals you use for performances or auditions?
Do any of you classical musicians out there have any talismans or rituals you use for performances or auditions?
BF: hey! I’m almost home from rehearsal, and I know we’re going to dinner later, but…. Have you had a snack since I left?
Me *staring at the 4 hyperfixation projects I had today* 🤣 I don’t think I’ve had water since you left.
BF: yeah, that’s what I thought. Go have a snack and some water.
Me *staring at the 4 hyperfixation projects I had today* 🤣 I don’t think I’ve had water since you left.
BF: yeah, that’s what I thought. Go have a snack and some water.
October 18, 2025 at 9:33 PM
BF: hey! I’m almost home from rehearsal, and I know we’re going to dinner later, but…. Have you had a snack since I left?
Me *staring at the 4 hyperfixation projects I had today* 🤣 I don’t think I’ve had water since you left.
BF: yeah, that’s what I thought. Go have a snack and some water.
Me *staring at the 4 hyperfixation projects I had today* 🤣 I don’t think I’ve had water since you left.
BF: yeah, that’s what I thought. Go have a snack and some water.
I love doing embroidery, because I can enshrine curse words and weird stuff into handmade glory, and I can design my own stuff.
But my friend was like, “you should learn to spin and dye your own thread!”
I would rather poke all my embroidery needles into my forehead.
But my friend was like, “you should learn to spin and dye your own thread!”
I would rather poke all my embroidery needles into my forehead.
October 16, 2025 at 7:14 PM
I love doing embroidery, because I can enshrine curse words and weird stuff into handmade glory, and I can design my own stuff.
But my friend was like, “you should learn to spin and dye your own thread!”
I would rather poke all my embroidery needles into my forehead.
But my friend was like, “you should learn to spin and dye your own thread!”
I would rather poke all my embroidery needles into my forehead.
Conductor talking about Beethoven 9:
“Does anyone in the orchestra know what they are singing about in this moment?”
Orchestra: 😐
Me: I only know the Sister Act II translation
“Does anyone in the orchestra know what they are singing about in this moment?”
Orchestra: 😐
Me: I only know the Sister Act II translation
a group of people standing in front of a crowd with the words what have you done for him lately
ALT: a group of people standing in front of a crowd with the words what have you done for him lately
media.tenor.com
September 29, 2025 at 2:09 AM
Conductor talking about Beethoven 9:
“Does anyone in the orchestra know what they are singing about in this moment?”
Orchestra: 😐
Me: I only know the Sister Act II translation
“Does anyone in the orchestra know what they are singing about in this moment?”
Orchestra: 😐
Me: I only know the Sister Act II translation
I know everybody’s gotta make a living. But I swear to god, this damn ice cream truck… if I have to hear “Do your ears hang low” in a chipper calliope sound one more time, I might just find my 13th reason
September 24, 2025 at 11:53 PM
I know everybody’s gotta make a living. But I swear to god, this damn ice cream truck… if I have to hear “Do your ears hang low” in a chipper calliope sound one more time, I might just find my 13th reason
Omg climate change is real. STAHP making pleather pants and skirts! It’s too hot.
a man talking on a cell phone in a bathroom with the words i got really hot in my leather pants
ALT: a man talking on a cell phone in a bathroom with the words i got really hot in my leather pants
media.tenor.com
September 24, 2025 at 3:29 PM
Omg climate change is real. STAHP making pleather pants and skirts! It’s too hot.
Look, y’all… I did not like Colin Allred the first time he ran. I still voted for him because Ted can walk to Cancun via the Gulf of Mexico for all I care.
But James Talarico entered the race and I whooped like Howard Dean after the Iowa caucus.
But James Talarico entered the race and I whooped like Howard Dean after the Iowa caucus.
a muscular man screaming with the words let 's go
ALT: a muscular man screaming with the words let 's go
media.tenor.com
September 17, 2025 at 9:57 PM
Look, y’all… I did not like Colin Allred the first time he ran. I still voted for him because Ted can walk to Cancun via the Gulf of Mexico for all I care.
But James Talarico entered the race and I whooped like Howard Dean after the Iowa caucus.
But James Talarico entered the race and I whooped like Howard Dean after the Iowa caucus.
Hot tip: going to your vegetarian/vegan friend’s house for dinner and don’t know what to bring?
Bring Alcohol.
It’s possibly vegan, makes everyone happy, and you don’t have to figure out what bulgur is and where to buy it.
Bring Alcohol.
It’s possibly vegan, makes everyone happy, and you don’t have to figure out what bulgur is and where to buy it.
September 8, 2025 at 2:42 PM
Hot tip: going to your vegetarian/vegan friend’s house for dinner and don’t know what to bring?
Bring Alcohol.
It’s possibly vegan, makes everyone happy, and you don’t have to figure out what bulgur is and where to buy it.
Bring Alcohol.
It’s possibly vegan, makes everyone happy, and you don’t have to figure out what bulgur is and where to buy it.
Reposted by Jolene
America heartbroken to discover president somehow still alive
September 2, 2025 at 6:55 PM
America heartbroken to discover president somehow still alive
Ok, but if the potion Ursula uses to turn into Vanessa is essentially the same as Polyjuice potion…
Who is this poor woman, and where is Ursula keeping her to harvest her DNA?
JUSTICE FOR VANESSA
Who is this poor woman, and where is Ursula keeping her to harvest her DNA?
JUSTICE FOR VANESSA
September 2, 2025 at 6:03 PM
Ok, but if the potion Ursula uses to turn into Vanessa is essentially the same as Polyjuice potion…
Who is this poor woman, and where is Ursula keeping her to harvest her DNA?
JUSTICE FOR VANESSA
Who is this poor woman, and where is Ursula keeping her to harvest her DNA?
JUSTICE FOR VANESSA