I Am A Pyrite King
@iamapyriteking.bsky.social
Mining fools' good since before you were born. I can either tell you who I am, or show you who I am, but on social media it's tough to do both.
12 drummers drumming?
11 pipers piping, 10 lords a-leaping, 9 -- NINE! -- ladies dancing?!
Somebody did their Christmas shopping at Costco...
11 pipers piping, 10 lords a-leaping, 9 -- NINE! -- ladies dancing?!
Somebody did their Christmas shopping at Costco...
December 14, 2025 at 7:53 PM
12 drummers drumming?
11 pipers piping, 10 lords a-leaping, 9 -- NINE! -- ladies dancing?!
Somebody did their Christmas shopping at Costco...
11 pipers piping, 10 lords a-leaping, 9 -- NINE! -- ladies dancing?!
Somebody did their Christmas shopping at Costco...
One day I will accidentally drop a bowl of soup in your lap, and it will be all over your britches.
🤔 I didn't do this right, did I?
🤔 I didn't do this right, did I?
One day the dirt will be filled in and it will be all over for you ditches.
One day this mandatory fire ban will expire, and it will be all over for you birches.
December 14, 2025 at 2:25 PM
One day I will accidentally drop a bowl of soup in your lap, and it will be all over your britches.
🤔 I didn't do this right, did I?
🤔 I didn't do this right, did I?
Walking into 2026
December 14, 2025 at 1:47 AM
Walking into 2026
Walking into 2026
December 14, 2025 at 1:40 AM
Walking into 2026
At this point, CBS News should just drop off the "News" part.
Also the "C".
Also the "C".
December 14, 2025 at 12:06 AM
At this point, CBS News should just drop off the "News" part.
Also the "C".
Also the "C".
Walking into 2026:
December 13, 2025 at 11:14 PM
Walking into 2026:
I have given away
the heart
you gave me
last Christmas
and which
you were probably
expecting me
to keep
Forgive me
it was disgusting
so red
and so raw
the heart
you gave me
last Christmas
and which
you were probably
expecting me
to keep
Forgive me
it was disgusting
so red
and so raw
December 13, 2025 at 10:56 PM
I have given away
the heart
you gave me
last Christmas
and which
you were probably
expecting me
to keep
Forgive me
it was disgusting
so red
and so raw
the heart
you gave me
last Christmas
and which
you were probably
expecting me
to keep
Forgive me
it was disgusting
so red
and so raw
Last Christmas
I gave you my heart
The very next day
You brought me the head
Of Alfredo García
I gave you my heart
The very next day
You brought me the head
Of Alfredo García
December 13, 2025 at 6:48 PM
Last Christmas
I gave you my heart
The very next day
You brought me the head
Of Alfredo García
I gave you my heart
The very next day
You brought me the head
Of Alfredo García
Last Christmas
I gave you my liver
The very next day
You ate it with fava beans
And a nice chianti
I gave you my liver
The very next day
You ate it with fava beans
And a nice chianti
December 12, 2025 at 3:48 PM
Last Christmas
I gave you my liver
The very next day
You ate it with fava beans
And a nice chianti
I gave you my liver
The very next day
You ate it with fava beans
And a nice chianti
Just did a face scan to verify my age on Bluesky
December 9, 2025 at 8:51 PM
Just did a face scan to verify my age on Bluesky
So the campanologist asked me if I might, by any chance, have a spare clapper. I did not.
This was a shame, but it did earn me the No Bell-Piece Prize.
This was a shame, but it did earn me the No Bell-Piece Prize.
December 9, 2025 at 1:57 AM
So the campanologist asked me if I might, by any chance, have a spare clapper. I did not.
This was a shame, but it did earn me the No Bell-Piece Prize.
This was a shame, but it did earn me the No Bell-Piece Prize.
You will be visited by three spirits.
(Would love this.)
(Would love this.)
December 9, 2025 at 1:49 AM
You will be visited by three spirits.
(Would love this.)
(Would love this.)
Ok, now *this* is disturbing:
I'm used to autocorrupt messing up my posts. I live for multilingual puns, so I expect my phone to ruin my jokes and plan accordingly.
But it looks like autocarrot is now looking BACKWARDS at my whole sentences and retroactively "correcting" things I've already fixed.
I'm used to autocorrupt messing up my posts. I live for multilingual puns, so I expect my phone to ruin my jokes and plan accordingly.
But it looks like autocarrot is now looking BACKWARDS at my whole sentences and retroactively "correcting" things I've already fixed.
December 8, 2025 at 2:23 PM
Ok, now *this* is disturbing:
I'm used to autocorrupt messing up my posts. I live for multilingual puns, so I expect my phone to ruin my jokes and plan accordingly.
But it looks like autocarrot is now looking BACKWARDS at my whole sentences and retroactively "correcting" things I've already fixed.
I'm used to autocorrupt messing up my posts. I live for multilingual puns, so I expect my phone to ruin my jokes and plan accordingly.
But it looks like autocarrot is now looking BACKWARDS at my whole sentences and retroactively "correcting" things I've already fixed.
Little Bunny FIFA
Stumbling through the White House
Picking up the Peace Prize
And shoving it up his...
(The past tense of FIFA is FAFO.)
Stumbling through the White House
Picking up the Peace Prize
And shoving it up his...
(The past tense of FIFA is FAFO.)
December 8, 2025 at 2:20 PM
Little Bunny FIFA
Stumbling through the White House
Picking up the Peace Prize
And shoving it up his...
(The past tense of FIFA is FAFO.)
Stumbling through the White House
Picking up the Peace Prize
And shoving it up his...
(The past tense of FIFA is FAFO.)
Aw damn it, I got another Peace Prize in my cereal box. I was hoping for a Hello Kitty.
December 8, 2025 at 2:17 PM
Aw damn it, I got another Peace Prize in my cereal box. I was hoping for a Hello Kitty.
Movie you've watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Stars (Wars or Trek), LOTR, or Marvel, Disney Animated or Pixar.
Harder mode: No DC, DreamWorks/Illumination, Amblin, sci-fi, horror, or from Japan.
(Even Harder mode: in cinemas, not on video!)
Harder mode: No DC, DreamWorks/Illumination, Amblin, sci-fi, horror, or from Japan.
(Even Harder mode: in cinemas, not on video!)
December 8, 2025 at 2:18 AM
Movie you've watched more than six times with a gif. Hard mode: no Stars (Wars or Trek), LOTR, or Marvel, Disney Animated or Pixar.
Harder mode: No DC, DreamWorks/Illumination, Amblin, sci-fi, horror, or from Japan.
(Even Harder mode: in cinemas, not on video!)
Harder mode: No DC, DreamWorks/Illumination, Amblin, sci-fi, horror, or from Japan.
(Even Harder mode: in cinemas, not on video!)
December 7, 2025 at 7:59 PM
Movie.
Theaters.
Forever. 🖤🍿🎬
Theaters.
Forever. 🖤🍿🎬
December 7, 2025 at 5:55 PM
Movie.
Theaters.
Forever. 🖤🍿🎬
Theaters.
Forever. 🖤🍿🎬
For the last two days I've felt something strange, like I had a bend in my shoe... so tonight I decided to see what the problem was.
There was a cat toy crammed in the toe.
This Guy likes playing in my shoes during the night. I've been walking around with his toy in my shoe... 😸
There was a cat toy crammed in the toe.
This Guy likes playing in my shoes during the night. I've been walking around with his toy in my shoe... 😸
December 3, 2025 at 1:27 AM
For the last two days I've felt something strange, like I had a bend in my shoe... so tonight I decided to see what the problem was.
There was a cat toy crammed in the toe.
This Guy likes playing in my shoes during the night. I've been walking around with his toy in my shoe... 😸
There was a cat toy crammed in the toe.
This Guy likes playing in my shoes during the night. I've been walking around with his toy in my shoe... 😸
I'm only posting this because they're bribing me with extra points to do it. I am so close to dropping this miserable app, but the Sunk Cost fallacy is tough to beat.
Plus, there seem to be no other free apps that offer my set of less-popular languages in one place. Damn it.
Plus, there seem to be no other free apps that offer my set of less-popular languages in one place. Damn it.
December 3, 2025 at 12:49 AM
I'm only posting this because they're bribing me with extra points to do it. I am so close to dropping this miserable app, but the Sunk Cost fallacy is tough to beat.
Plus, there seem to be no other free apps that offer my set of less-popular languages in one place. Damn it.
Plus, there seem to be no other free apps that offer my set of less-popular languages in one place. Damn it.
Strong Floor, No... (uhh...)
December 2, 2025 at 3:03 AM
Strong Floor, No... (uhh...)
Drop something FIERY 🔥🖤🔥
December 2, 2025 at 2:17 AM
Drop something FIERY 🔥🖤🔥
Share someone who looks stylish wearing a vest.
December 1, 2025 at 3:56 PM
Share someone who looks stylish wearing a vest.
A Modest Proposal: Hegseth should not only be fired, they should send in a whole team to do it. He should face a, a, let's see... an Unhiring Group? A De-employing Battalion? A Laying-Off Troop? I'm sure there's a term we could agree on.
November 30, 2025 at 11:28 PM
A Modest Proposal: Hegseth should not only be fired, they should send in a whole team to do it. He should face a, a, let's see... an Unhiring Group? A De-employing Battalion? A Laying-Off Troop? I'm sure there's a term we could agree on.
Last Christmas
I gave you my heart
The very next day
You fucked life in ze gall bladder
I gave you my heart
The very next day
You fucked life in ze gall bladder
November 30, 2025 at 9:55 PM
Last Christmas
I gave you my heart
The very next day
You fucked life in ze gall bladder
I gave you my heart
The very next day
You fucked life in ze gall bladder