Author | Lightnews

Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · 12h

About me

Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · 1d

I found a pair of special sunglasses which have enlightened me to the secret truth about our society, which is that everything is slightly too bright all the time

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · 2d

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · 3d

I’m sick of their shit… I could replace them all in an instant

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · 4d

I never considered that the video of me drunk and shirtless at a wedding would come back to embarrass me

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · 5d

It's positioned as a complete ecosystem

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · 6d

They're coming out with a new leaf you can put in food while you cook it. It's not just going to be bay leaf anymore

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · 8d

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · 22d

If you need to have complete control over every response to your posts just like… don’t go online. Why are you on the device that connects you to other people

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · May 24

Behold, what honk from yonder window breaks. It is the bobo, and Juliet is the Steven Tyler

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · May 10

Not my ass ovulating

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Apr 22

Love that guy

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Apr 15

Farking auto correct

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Apr 15

Walked by a lady walking her dog and she was inside the door to her building and the dog was still outside like he didn’t know he was supposed to go inside, so I said “Go inside, dode,” rather than either “Go inside, dog” or “Go inside, dude.” Not sure which I was attempting

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Apr 11

The doctors say I have the wrong amount of blood... They're not sure whether it's not enough, or whether it's too much, but they know it's not the right amount

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Apr 11

Hell yeah

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Apr 9

Getting jounced off the limb of the tree that is Life

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Apr 9

Killing one of my favorite podcast hosts' pets for each company that sends them stuff for free

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Apr 8

Getting my ass shot with buckshot and other bullets

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Apr 7

Last chance for ants

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Apr 7

Nice setup.

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Apr 6

Headbanging is the new smoking

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Mar 29

Every day the construction guys come and run another wire from the telephone pole in the alley to the side of my building. Every day they’re running a new wire. I don’t know what they’re running all these wires for

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Mar 24

Had a dream I was listening to the radio and they played a country song called “The Stanley Cup Is Broken in My Brother’s Truck”

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Steve @extranapkins.bsky.social · Mar 24

I thought maybe it was the dumpster’s birthday

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