Disappointed Optimist
@disappoptimism.bsky.social
I’m that guy that looks just like this that did that tweet that made you laugh that one time. UK based.
Pinned
This is my thread of threads - the stories & tales I tell in one place for the Bluesky:
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
Grifters gotta grift.
November 28, 2025 at 9:43 PM
Grifters gotta grift.
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
Huh. Weird. My “I dressed as a Nazi to my ex girlfriend’s fancy dress birthday party at the polish war veteran club” story got lost on Twitter.
Guess I have to write it out again for
Your judgement and entertainment
Guess I have to write it out again for
Your judgement and entertainment
November 15, 2024 at 5:17 PM
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
I’m adding one of my favourite British news stories to my tales because… well it’s just marvellous
November 15, 2024 at 3:54 PM
I’m adding one of my favourite British news stories to my tales because… well it’s just marvellous
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
Here it is: the thread that started it all on Twitter - my three bad dates story first posted back in Easter 2019….
November 11, 2024 at 8:20 PM
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
I am overdue my #ghost story for this platform, for that I apologise, but perhaps a series of my distracting tales will help all of us - with that in mind here’s the first:
November 6, 2024 at 9:58 PM
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
“I was just following otters.”
November 28, 2025 at 9:09 PM
“I was just following otters.”
Gone shopping in blue water on Black Friday like a total dunce
November 28, 2025 at 11:36 AM
Gone shopping in blue water on Black Friday like a total dunce
At this point I’m pretty happy to indulge in a little conspiracy theory about an Afghan national with military training suddenly deciding to gun down two national guards in Washington.
Conversely I’m also willing to accept that more violence is inevitable.
Conversely I’m also willing to accept that more violence is inevitable.
November 28, 2025 at 10:05 AM
At this point I’m pretty happy to indulge in a little conspiracy theory about an Afghan national with military training suddenly deciding to gun down two national guards in Washington.
Conversely I’m also willing to accept that more violence is inevitable.
Conversely I’m also willing to accept that more violence is inevitable.
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
After the Louvre heist.
"This is the most french crime ever!"
The Escargot thieves: "Hold my Châteauneuf-du-Pape!"
"This is the most french crime ever!"
The Escargot thieves: "Hold my Châteauneuf-du-Pape!"
November 28, 2025 at 9:34 AM
After the Louvre heist.
"This is the most french crime ever!"
The Escargot thieves: "Hold my Châteauneuf-du-Pape!"
"This is the most french crime ever!"
The Escargot thieves: "Hold my Châteauneuf-du-Pape!"
Heads up postcode map nerds Dan has done a thing that makes me
Vibrate and will do it for you as well
Vibrate and will do it for you as well
We’ve mapped the mansion tax.
You can see who's paying - which constituency, which postcode - and how many "mansions" are near you.
Full interactive map here 👇
You can see who's paying - which constituency, which postcode - and how many "mansions" are near you.
Full interactive map here 👇
November 28, 2025 at 9:35 AM
Heads up postcode map nerds Dan has done a thing that makes me
Vibrate and will do it for you as well
Vibrate and will do it for you as well
Escargone
Thieves have stolen €90,000 worth of fine French snails destined for some of the country’s most prestigious restaurants
Thieves take €90,000 of snails meant for Michelin-starred restaurants
French police are on the trail of ‘experienced’ criminals who stole a whole year’s worth of produce from Jean-Mathieu Dauvergne’s L’Escargot des Grands Crus
www.thetimes.com
November 28, 2025 at 9:27 AM
Escargone
*rubs temples*
That’s a quadruple lock.
There will be pensioners earning more than me & be more liquid.
I’m a husband, single income father of two.
That’s a quadruple lock.
There will be pensioners earning more than me & be more liquid.
I’m a husband, single income father of two.
Interesting - the Chancellor tells @martinlewis.moneysavingexpert.com that those receiving only the state pension won’t pay income tax even when the pension passes the (frozen) income tax threshold. So in effect the income tax threshold will newly rise by the triple lock, for some not all pensioners
November 28, 2025 at 8:07 AM
*rubs temples*
That’s a quadruple lock.
There will be pensioners earning more than me & be more liquid.
I’m a husband, single income father of two.
That’s a quadruple lock.
There will be pensioners earning more than me & be more liquid.
I’m a husband, single income father of two.
What I like about this dipshit mindset is its then outraged there is nobody to do all the jobs that need doing
The Reform council leader has reacted to Labour's scrapping of the two-child benefit cap...
More here: www.kentonline.co.uk/kent/news/no...
More here: www.kentonline.co.uk/kent/news/no...
November 27, 2025 at 7:01 PM
What I like about this dipshit mindset is its then outraged there is nobody to do all the jobs that need doing
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
Hang a banner across the front that says "Acacia Avenue Welcomes Prince Andrew."
November 27, 2025 at 4:43 PM
Hang a banner across the front that says "Acacia Avenue Welcomes Prince Andrew."
Does anyone have a recommendation for some non apple but apple compatible ear pods?
November 27, 2025 at 4:15 PM
Does anyone have a recommendation for some non apple but apple compatible ear pods?
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
All you need to do is tell two kids that "this is called the murder house", and allow the children's network to do the rest
November 27, 2025 at 3:59 PM
All you need to do is tell two kids that "this is called the murder house", and allow the children's network to do the rest
Ideas to devalue your £2m home:
Install an outdoors glass cubicle toilet on your front drive and make sure you use it regularly. Keep eye contact with anyone who sees you using it.
Install an outdoors glass cubicle toilet on your front drive and make sure you use it regularly. Keep eye contact with anyone who sees you using it.
November 27, 2025 at 3:48 PM
Ideas to devalue your £2m home:
Install an outdoors glass cubicle toilet on your front drive and make sure you use it regularly. Keep eye contact with anyone who sees you using it.
Install an outdoors glass cubicle toilet on your front drive and make sure you use it regularly. Keep eye contact with anyone who sees you using it.
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
Broke my hand when the massage table collapsed during an oily rub. Told my wife it was a trip on a pavement. She's now written a three-page letter to the council. I've just spent my Sunday identifying a suitably raised slab in case they send someone to investigate.
November 26, 2025 at 4:20 PM
Broke my hand when the massage table collapsed during an oily rub. Told my wife it was a trip on a pavement. She's now written a three-page letter to the council. I've just spent my Sunday identifying a suitably raised slab in case they send someone to investigate.
“Yes but the other day I saw on Facebook a black kid robbed someone and he was probably a Muslim & these migrants get all the benefits”
NEW: Net migration falls sharply to 204,000 in the year to June.
That’s a fall from 649,000 in the year to June 2024. It is a drop of nearly 80% from its 2023 peak.
That’s a fall from 649,000 in the year to June 2024. It is a drop of nearly 80% from its 2023 peak.
November 27, 2025 at 11:47 AM
“Yes but the other day I saw on Facebook a black kid robbed someone and he was probably a Muslim & these migrants get all the benefits”
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
We are now further away from the theatrical release of Raiders of the Lost Ark (June 12, 1981) than it was from the year it takes place in (1936). We have reached the Indiana Jones event horizon.
November 27, 2025 at 12:49 AM
We are now further away from the theatrical release of Raiders of the Lost Ark (June 12, 1981) than it was from the year it takes place in (1936). We have reached the Indiana Jones event horizon.
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
the horrifying realisation that ais talk the way our bosses wish we’d been talking to them all along
November 27, 2025 at 9:41 AM
the horrifying realisation that ais talk the way our bosses wish we’d been talking to them all along
Grok: can you show me the most divorced man video out there?
Everything about this might be the saddest thing I’ve ever seen
November 27, 2025 at 9:02 AM
Grok: can you show me the most divorced man video out there?
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
New net migration figures at 930am.
Net migration fell half a million to 344,000 in 2024 from 848k in 2023
56% of people think it went up last year
17% think stayed the same
14% think it went down
2025 figure to be lower again
16% expect that
38% think it will be up
31% about the same
Net migration fell half a million to 344,000 in 2024 from 848k in 2023
56% of people think it went up last year
17% think stayed the same
14% think it went down
2025 figure to be lower again
16% expect that
38% think it will be up
31% about the same
November 27, 2025 at 7:54 AM
New net migration figures at 930am.
Net migration fell half a million to 344,000 in 2024 from 848k in 2023
56% of people think it went up last year
17% think stayed the same
14% think it went down
2025 figure to be lower again
16% expect that
38% think it will be up
31% about the same
Net migration fell half a million to 344,000 in 2024 from 848k in 2023
56% of people think it went up last year
17% think stayed the same
14% think it went down
2025 figure to be lower again
16% expect that
38% think it will be up
31% about the same
Reposted by Disappointed Optimist
Tremendous work from @sheffieldtribune.bsky.social
If you're not up to speed on the Andrew Milne story, a scandal on multiple levels, read this. Then share it with someone else. It's a shocker, and we have the Tribune to thank for making it public
www.sheffieldtribune.co.uk/new-detectiv...
If you're not up to speed on the Andrew Milne story, a scandal on multiple levels, read this. Then share it with someone else. It's a shocker, and we have the Tribune to thank for making it public
www.sheffieldtribune.co.uk/new-detectiv...
New: Detectives ‘reviewing’ Andrew Milne case after MP reports him to the police
Plus: Private Eye has picked up the story and a top lawyer is speaking to leaseholders he targeted
www.sheffieldtribune.co.uk
November 26, 2025 at 6:46 PM
Tremendous work from @sheffieldtribune.bsky.social
If you're not up to speed on the Andrew Milne story, a scandal on multiple levels, read this. Then share it with someone else. It's a shocker, and we have the Tribune to thank for making it public
www.sheffieldtribune.co.uk/new-detectiv...
If you're not up to speed on the Andrew Milne story, a scandal on multiple levels, read this. Then share it with someone else. It's a shocker, and we have the Tribune to thank for making it public
www.sheffieldtribune.co.uk/new-detectiv...
I guarantee you Trump is taking crypto payment from China
PRESIDENT TRUMP ENCOURAGED JAPAN’S PRIME MINISTER IN A PRIVATE CALL TO LOWER THE TONE WITH CHINA’S XI AFTER SHE CAME OUT SWINGING ON TAIWAN- WSJ
November 27, 2025 at 12:05 AM
I guarantee you Trump is taking crypto payment from China