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Joe Writes Books

@blaguards.bsky.social

290 followers 190 following 570 posts

Writer of horror and fantasy. Magic and monster enthusiast. Engineer so ask me math questions to make me feel alive. He/him, no AI https://linktr.ee/joewolf

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · Dec 9

It has occurred to me that on a self-styled "author" account I should talk about "books" and "writing" so I guess I'll start doing that soon

Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 4h

tbh if I could tell a coworker "bruh my encounters were ass I almost wiped to Barry but Floatzel clutched it out" and they knew what I was saying I'd be ecstatic

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 4h

I guess technically it doesn't lol, the author def put effort into the sexy short though

Series overall is well-written, I read all of them and had a good time

Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 4h

I see him posting them as a complete afterthought

"Amiere posted a new album"
-19 pics of the kids playing Kiwi-batte
-3 pics of Cohaku with a cool bug she found
-1 pic of "oh yeah and I did this for work" and it's an absolute masterpiece of a crystalight

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 5h

Tomes & Tea series by Rebecca Thorne is low-spice, but has a spicy short at the end of book 3 (I think it's book 3 at least) so the readers can get their fix. Contains a mutual masturbation scene with the girls

cover art of "Tea You at the Altar" by Rebecca Thorne

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 5h

You won't believe this but I JUST read a mutual masturbation scene in a sapphic (not a sentence I'd ever expected to write)

Book 2 or 3 of Tomes & Tea has it at the end (series is low spice, so the author wrote a spicy short as bonus content for people to get their fix)

cover art of "Can't Spell Treason Without Tea" by Rebecca Thorne

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 11h

He would have entire shelves of amazing sculpture blurry in the background of a pic of his kids cause it just wouldn't occur to him to post them

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 1d

The author can be both

a couple of cartoon characters standing next to each other and talking .

Alt: Miguel and Tulio from Road to El Dorado saying "Both? Both? Both. Both is good."

media.tenor.com

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 1d

I picked this one up for free, and then paid for the sequels, cause they were good as hell!

And the author is cool as hell so support them 😎

Tru Skies @trudieskies.readindiefantasy.com · 1d

Today is the 4th anniversary of The Thirteenth Hour, the first book in my Cruel Gods series. This book went on to become a SPFBO & BBNYA finalist AND Indie Ink award winner for best setting/wittiest character!

To celebrate, I've put the ebook up for FREE for today only! 🥳

mybook.to/TheThirteent...

A promo image for the Thirteenth Hour's 4th anniversary featuring the book cover with funky glasses over the characters, and the text: Fantasy of bad manners, tea, and naughty words - four years! Cruel gods demand worship from their mortal subjects in this gaslamp fantasy featuring magical portals, gothic cosmic deities, quaint Britishisms, and steampunk vibes.

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 6d

One of the best feelings is picking up a book that you expect to be the conclusion to a series, realizing it's not, and also realizing "yeah I'd 100% read another of these"

Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 7d

as it turns out, it a vampire. He doesn't kill her immediately, which is nice.

Undead shenanigans ensue

Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 7d

Current WIP involves vamires, and romance, but not with the vampire cause he's 200 and she's 20something and that's weird

Our MC finds her mom and friends kidnapped, and as it turns out, most of the town is being taken over by a necromancer. She goes to the only person who can maybe help, who...

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 7d

One of his old subordinates chases him through an entire country, and he and his new friends come up on their home city... which is currently under siege by our MC's old friends

Violence and moodiness ensues

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 7d

Well the main one I've talked about is The Soul of War, which is the one the agents don't want at the moment 😀

It's a nice dark piece about a man running from his past as an officer in an imperialist army, who immediately gets sucked back into the fight on the opposite side

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 7d

most people don't know the whole "oranges are mostly boys" thing 🤷

Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 7d

We have to tell people all the time that our orange Rye (my pfp) isn't a girl

He's just... a very pretty boy. With an exceptionally pink nose

Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 7d

Brother no one asked

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 9d

a vampire from sesame street is wearing a black cape and a black hat .

ALT: a vampire from sesame street is wearing a black cape and a black hat .

media.tenor.com

Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 11d

100% deserved, thank you! Looking forward to reading more (eventually, the TBR is long)

Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 11d

Already bought book 2. Will def look into more by the author. @pairofclaws.bsky.social wrote something truly special and broke my fucking heart in the process

5⭐

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 11d

captured me, and the eldritch lore caught my fantasy-loving ass in the best way. But mostly, the characters.

Somehow, the author made these forest creatures feel more real and more human than most writers are capable of. I loved these two weirdos, and that's why the ending hit so hard/

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 11d

Recent Reads:

Dungeon Crawler Carl - fun, funny, and I really got behind our main duo. Bought the sequel, will see if I get through all 7 books
4⭐

Ghost Flower - WOW
I didn't know what I expected out of Ghost Flower but it blew me away. The prose is beautiful, the romance is sweet, the themes/

The cover of "Dungeon Crawler Carl" by Matt Dinniman

The cover of "Ghost Flower" by Jessica Conwell

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 14d

If I had a nickel for every book I've read this week that referenced "Live, Laugh, Love" I'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice

Reposted by Joe Writes Books

rachel-aaron.bsky.social @rachel-aaron.bsky.social · 14d

It's almost time, y'all!! amzn.to/48F4iGU

Hell Hath No Fury: Urban Fantasy Action with Witches and Demons (Tear Down Heaven Book 4)

Amazon.com: Hell Hath No Fury: Urban Fantasy Action with Witches and Demons (Tear Down Heaven Book 4) eBook : Aaron, Rachel: Kindle Store

amzn.to

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Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 18d

Tbh I don't like potato salad at all, it was just the most convenient example 😅

Joe Writes Books @blaguards.bsky.social · 19d

Turns out page 25 is right where the first fight scene starts, and the first time we get to see magic used for violence instead of utility

#writing #writersky #theSoulofWar #amquerying

Helfnir let instinct take over. His right hand flew to the hilt of his sword, and his left twitched, motivating his Infusions. He used his hold on the atmosphere around him to grab the air in the clearing and pull. Wind currents swirled and shifted, and five crossbow bolts were diverted from their course. They flew over his head, straight down into the ground, and to either side to embed themselves in trees or land harmlessly in the water.