Swamp Witch 🍂🍁
@beneathhergaze.bsky.social
Witch, wordsmith, midwife of emotions. Terminally online, vehemently anti-AI. DCTID. Always follows the #1 Rule of the Casual Criminalist.
Any mansplaining incurs a fee of $50. Unblocking fee $100.
"If you don't want to be in a poem, don't fuck a poet."
Any mansplaining incurs a fee of $50. Unblocking fee $100.
"If you don't want to be in a poem, don't fuck a poet."
Pinned
I don't do automatic follow 4 follow: some of y'all post like you're two seconds from either a grippy sock vacation or lacing up your Nike Decades and I am trying to preserve my sanity and peace here by cultivating my feeds. It's nothing personal.
I want another maple glazed squash pie and I, a certified fool, have no more winter squash in this house not will I dare venture out of this house till the roads are clear
Suffering
Suffering
Not pictured: me eating the last of the squash pie straight out of the tin
November 30, 2025 at 2:14 AM
I want another maple glazed squash pie and I, a certified fool, have no more winter squash in this house not will I dare venture out of this house till the roads are clear
Suffering
Suffering
Reposted by Swamp Witch 🍂🍁
i can’t watch stand up comedy anyway because someone’s just there saying things to try and make you laugh and i feel like they’re forcing me to find them funny just because they’re talking to an audience
November 29, 2025 at 9:36 PM
i can’t watch stand up comedy anyway because someone’s just there saying things to try and make you laugh and i feel like they’re forcing me to find them funny just because they’re talking to an audience
So I have, up to this point, had no clue how many cardinals have been living in our forest, bc they all look alike, right?
I just happened to glance out the window at the snow and saw NINE of them -- 4 boys, 5 girls -- arranged symmetrically on the bare tree branches, calmly watching the snow.
💜😭❤️
I just happened to glance out the window at the snow and saw NINE of them -- 4 boys, 5 girls -- arranged symmetrically on the bare tree branches, calmly watching the snow.
💜😭❤️
The two cardinals who set up house in our trees after my mom died have multiplied so fruitfully that there are several scraggly juveniles just nicely getting through bird puberty and I have a whole flock of them now!
November 29, 2025 at 9:29 PM
So I have, up to this point, had no clue how many cardinals have been living in our forest, bc they all look alike, right?
I just happened to glance out the window at the snow and saw NINE of them -- 4 boys, 5 girls -- arranged symmetrically on the bare tree branches, calmly watching the snow.
💜😭❤️
I just happened to glance out the window at the snow and saw NINE of them -- 4 boys, 5 girls -- arranged symmetrically on the bare tree branches, calmly watching the snow.
💜😭❤️
Cozymaxxing in preparation of the snow
November 29, 2025 at 7:07 PM
Cozymaxxing in preparation of the snow
Reposted by Swamp Witch 🍂🍁
im so angry all the time
im so joyous all the time
im so sorrowful all the time
im so amorous all the time
im so haunted all the time
im so joyous all the time
im so sorrowful all the time
im so amorous all the time
im so haunted all the time
November 29, 2025 at 3:49 PM
im so angry all the time
im so joyous all the time
im so sorrowful all the time
im so amorous all the time
im so haunted all the time
im so joyous all the time
im so sorrowful all the time
im so amorous all the time
im so haunted all the time
Hwait
The UM-OSU game that a shitload of people travel in for starts a quarter after noon?
And the whiteout blizzard is fixing to hit at 3pm?
Have I got that right?
The UM-OSU game that a shitload of people travel in for starts a quarter after noon?
And the whiteout blizzard is fixing to hit at 3pm?
Have I got that right?
November 29, 2025 at 2:12 PM
Hwait
The UM-OSU game that a shitload of people travel in for starts a quarter after noon?
And the whiteout blizzard is fixing to hit at 3pm?
Have I got that right?
The UM-OSU game that a shitload of people travel in for starts a quarter after noon?
And the whiteout blizzard is fixing to hit at 3pm?
Have I got that right?
Reposted by Swamp Witch 🍂🍁
If any of y'all can recommend a reliable, reasonably priced under-sink filter that DOES NOT have coconut coir as part of the filter system, please let me know ASAP. I hate having to store water in plastic anyway but I am allergic to coconut and can't find a filter system that doesn't use coir.
One thing about me is I grew up in the American climate equivalent of fuckin Siberia where we were regularly snowed in for days in a place with bad water, so under no auspices will I ever risk being in a storm without water stores at the ready, but like...of all the fuckin days to run out 💀
November 28, 2025 at 12:19 PM
If any of y'all can recommend a reliable, reasonably priced under-sink filter that DOES NOT have coconut coir as part of the filter system, please let me know ASAP. I hate having to store water in plastic anyway but I am allergic to coconut and can't find a filter system that doesn't use coir.
Angelika decided today to try again to poop on the dining room carpet for no obvious reason & folks, let's give it up for @deamonsinfloors.bsky.social bc I have seen him literally catch his shirt on fire & yet somehow not move as fast as he did today to scoop her up & race to her litterbox in time.
November 29, 2025 at 2:39 AM
Angelika decided today to try again to poop on the dining room carpet for no obvious reason & folks, let's give it up for @deamonsinfloors.bsky.social bc I have seen him literally catch his shirt on fire & yet somehow not move as fast as he did today to scoop her up & race to her litterbox in time.
Therapist: That wasn't what I meant when I said you should look into a lamp to improve your mood this winter.
Me: *unplugging lava lamp* I don't understand
Me: *unplugging lava lamp* I don't understand
November 28, 2025 at 10:00 PM
Therapist: That wasn't what I meant when I said you should look into a lamp to improve your mood this winter.
Me: *unplugging lava lamp* I don't understand
Me: *unplugging lava lamp* I don't understand
If any of y'all can recommend a reliable, reasonably priced under-sink filter that DOES NOT have coconut coir as part of the filter system, please let me know ASAP. I hate having to store water in plastic anyway but I am allergic to coconut and can't find a filter system that doesn't use coir.
One thing about me is I grew up in the American climate equivalent of fuckin Siberia where we were regularly snowed in for days in a place with bad water, so under no auspices will I ever risk being in a storm without water stores at the ready, but like...of all the fuckin days to run out 💀
November 28, 2025 at 12:19 PM
If any of y'all can recommend a reliable, reasonably priced under-sink filter that DOES NOT have coconut coir as part of the filter system, please let me know ASAP. I hate having to store water in plastic anyway but I am allergic to coconut and can't find a filter system that doesn't use coir.
Me: " I never buy anything during Black Friday, boycotting is easy!"
Also me: *uses all the bulk water gallons during Thanksgiving cooking, has no more water*
Weatherman: "There is a massive fuckoff snowstorm coming tonight. Be prepared."
Me: 🫠
Also me: *uses all the bulk water gallons during Thanksgiving cooking, has no more water*
Weatherman: "There is a massive fuckoff snowstorm coming tonight. Be prepared."
Me: 🫠
November 28, 2025 at 11:57 AM
Me: " I never buy anything during Black Friday, boycotting is easy!"
Also me: *uses all the bulk water gallons during Thanksgiving cooking, has no more water*
Weatherman: "There is a massive fuckoff snowstorm coming tonight. Be prepared."
Me: 🫠
Also me: *uses all the bulk water gallons during Thanksgiving cooking, has no more water*
Weatherman: "There is a massive fuckoff snowstorm coming tonight. Be prepared."
Me: 🫠
Angelika is furious she has received no bacon today
November 28, 2025 at 3:49 AM
Angelika is furious she has received no bacon today
Bacon turkey was v moist but could've used a lil more flavor bc the bacon didn't really transfer any flavor & also kind of sucked up the spices I put on the outside of the turkey. I'd do it again though.
Squash pie has a maple glaze on it & this is unquestionably the greatest pie I've ever made.
Squash pie has a maple glaze on it & this is unquestionably the greatest pie I've ever made.
November 28, 2025 at 2:29 AM
Bacon turkey was v moist but could've used a lil more flavor bc the bacon didn't really transfer any flavor & also kind of sucked up the spices I put on the outside of the turkey. I'd do it again though.
Squash pie has a maple glaze on it & this is unquestionably the greatest pie I've ever made.
Squash pie has a maple glaze on it & this is unquestionably the greatest pie I've ever made.
I am going to throw this man in a toilet
@beneathhergaze.bsky.social wants me to crawl into the oven like I don't know this trick
November 28, 2025 at 1:46 AM
I am going to throw this man in a toilet
Update: fritters did not happen bc the beans were just too burnt, so I'm now eating some refried bean tacos w/ the tomato soup to get me through till turkey's done
Squashes roasted & cooling
Bacon turkey is in the oven late bc I had to take inventory of the toothpicks like I was performing surgery
Squashes roasted & cooling
Bacon turkey is in the oven late bc I had to take inventory of the toothpicks like I was performing surgery
November 27, 2025 at 10:50 PM
Update: fritters did not happen bc the beans were just too burnt, so I'm now eating some refried bean tacos w/ the tomato soup to get me through till turkey's done
Squashes roasted & cooling
Bacon turkey is in the oven late bc I had to take inventory of the toothpicks like I was performing surgery
Squashes roasted & cooling
Bacon turkey is in the oven late bc I had to take inventory of the toothpicks like I was performing surgery
Whoever Etsy Witched the Loins, I'm gonna find you, baby
⛤🧿
⛤🧿
November 27, 2025 at 9:22 PM
Whoever Etsy Witched the Loins, I'm gonna find you, baby
⛤🧿
⛤🧿
I hope someone undercooks these refs' turkeys so they all get food poisoning. Absolute clown behavior left, right and center.
November 27, 2025 at 7:24 PM
I hope someone undercooks these refs' turkeys so they all get food poisoning. Absolute clown behavior left, right and center.
Y'all I'm going to lose my shit
I went to give myself my Mounjaro, unlocked and hit the button, and FORGOT TO TAKE THE CAP OFF. It sprayed all over me & now I'm short a dose, plus I don't have another one warmed up to prevent hives but I'm late taking it & can't wait another day. I'm gonna scream.
I went to give myself my Mounjaro, unlocked and hit the button, and FORGOT TO TAKE THE CAP OFF. It sprayed all over me & now I'm short a dose, plus I don't have another one warmed up to prevent hives but I'm late taking it & can't wait another day. I'm gonna scream.
The irony ofc is that I need to take my Mounjaro which will perk up my energy but then I won't want to eat 😭 the struggle
November 27, 2025 at 5:26 PM
Y'all I'm going to lose my shit
I went to give myself my Mounjaro, unlocked and hit the button, and FORGOT TO TAKE THE CAP OFF. It sprayed all over me & now I'm short a dose, plus I don't have another one warmed up to prevent hives but I'm late taking it & can't wait another day. I'm gonna scream.
I went to give myself my Mounjaro, unlocked and hit the button, and FORGOT TO TAKE THE CAP OFF. It sprayed all over me & now I'm short a dose, plus I don't have another one warmed up to prevent hives but I'm late taking it & can't wait another day. I'm gonna scream.
Stuff I may make today depending on whether my energy holds out & if said ingredients are still good/in the house:
- Bacon-wrapped turkey
- Mom's mashed potatoes
- Tomato & cipollini soup
- Black bean fritters
- Salad feat. lettuce & radicchio in the greenhouse
- Cranberry cloud cake
- Squash pie
- Bacon-wrapped turkey
- Mom's mashed potatoes
- Tomato & cipollini soup
- Black bean fritters
- Salad feat. lettuce & radicchio in the greenhouse
- Cranberry cloud cake
- Squash pie
November 27, 2025 at 4:29 PM
Stuff I may make today depending on whether my energy holds out & if said ingredients are still good/in the house:
- Bacon-wrapped turkey
- Mom's mashed potatoes
- Tomato & cipollini soup
- Black bean fritters
- Salad feat. lettuce & radicchio in the greenhouse
- Cranberry cloud cake
- Squash pie
- Bacon-wrapped turkey
- Mom's mashed potatoes
- Tomato & cipollini soup
- Black bean fritters
- Salad feat. lettuce & radicchio in the greenhouse
- Cranberry cloud cake
- Squash pie
Reposted by Swamp Witch 🍂🍁
And artists get alot of goodwill. It's a privilege I do recognize and am thankful for. People have trouble accepting artists are bad people because of this bias and because what we make is so instantaneously parasocial. Ai bros know this and want to use it like camouflage.
November 27, 2025 at 4:41 AM
And artists get alot of goodwill. It's a privilege I do recognize and am thankful for. People have trouble accepting artists are bad people because of this bias and because what we make is so instantaneously parasocial. Ai bros know this and want to use it like camouflage.
I am buried beneath multiple layers of minky blanket and I think my brain is finally at peace for the first time in weeks
November 27, 2025 at 5:01 AM
I am buried beneath multiple layers of minky blanket and I think my brain is finally at peace for the first time in weeks
This storm system has my knees lit up like bonfires. Ridiculous physiology.
November 27, 2025 at 3:11 AM
This storm system has my knees lit up like bonfires. Ridiculous physiology.
Reposted by Swamp Witch 🍂🍁
I don't see why it even matters if LLMs are sentient when we already take every opportunity possible to deny basic rights and dignity to entire swaths of *other humans* who've been deemed lesser. How's using a supposedly conscious LLM any different than the slavery that props up our entire society?
i think our cultural infatuation with “the Turing Test” has been disastrous.
November 22, 2025 at 8:19 PM
I don't see why it even matters if LLMs are sentient when we already take every opportunity possible to deny basic rights and dignity to entire swaths of *other humans* who've been deemed lesser. How's using a supposedly conscious LLM any different than the slavery that props up our entire society?
Reposted by Swamp Witch 🍂🍁
I think it should be legally mandatory to disclose whether your last relationship ended due to your usage of AI, like w/ infectious disease. At least there's PrEP for HIV; I can't fix "so emotionally stunted that you'd rather love a computer that can only tell you that you're God's specialest boy".
one of the more bleak aspects of ai chatbots is it’s starting to blow up real marriages
November 24, 2025 at 4:08 PM
I think it should be legally mandatory to disclose whether your last relationship ended due to your usage of AI, like w/ infectious disease. At least there's PrEP for HIV; I can't fix "so emotionally stunted that you'd rather love a computer that can only tell you that you're God's specialest boy".
November 26, 2025 at 10:11 PM