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Night of the Living Ted Raymond

@tedraymond.bsky.social

2.7K followers 740 following 4.4K posts

Local news reporter for CTV News Ottawa. Award-adjacent. Wrote a good headline in 2022. Opinions expressed are those of your employer. I speak French and early Simpsons.

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Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 27d

Should we lose our way
Tire of all of this pain
We won't be afraid
To forge ahead

Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 1h

You could have just emailed me.

Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 4h

Good morning, Ottawa!
Bonjour, Ottawa!

A sekelton sits on top of the immigrant entrepreneur Canada pop up shop in the ByWard Market.

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Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 6h

It's looking at me.

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Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 6h

This man is NOT my prime minister!!!!!

Stock photo of some guy in a button down shirt and blue jeans. I don't know who he is. I found the picture on Google Image Search in 2 seconds. It's for a joke. If you're reading this, you're a smart and sexy person who deserves love, affection, and a living wage.

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Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 16h

Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 19h

*Pornhub exec reading this slowly flips to notes app, deletes “productivity suite?” from note labelled “pitches”*

Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 21h

The six exclamation marks is what makes it legal under admiralty law, according to a guy I saw in a YouTube video who said he heard that from someone on the street that once lived with a roommate whose dad's cousin was a former elementary school classmate of a judge.

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 1d

Trump announces another strike "just off the Coast of Venezuela" that killed 6 people

Under my Standing Authorities as Commander-in-Chief, this morning, the Secretary of War, ordered a lethal kinetic strike on a vessel affiliated with a Designated Terrorist Organization (DTO) conducting narcotrafficking in the USSOUTHCOM area of responsibility — just off the Coast of Venezuela. Intelligence confirmed the vessel was trafficking narcotics, was associated with illicit narcoterrorist networks, and was transiting along a known DTO route. The strike was conducted in International Waters, and six male narcoterrorists aboard the vessel were killed in the strike. No U.S. Forces were harmed. Thank you for your attention to this matter!!!!!!

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Reposted by Night of the Living Ted Raymond

ℳatt @matttomic.bsky.social · 22h

Here's a recording of the pilot of C-GZPT, a Cirrus SR22, tracing the Jays logo over Nova Scotia

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Reposted by Night of the Living Ted Raymond

Kendra, regular version @kendrawcandraw.bsky.social · 1d

You can't logic your way out of being burnt out. Unless you're me. Who should be able to do it and it's a personal failing that I can't

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Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 23h

You read my mind.

Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 23h

You don't get rich writing cheques, Andy.

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Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 1d

Good morning, Ottawa.
Bonjour, Ottawa.

A skeleton standing tall in the ByWard Market. Its left hand is very close to the camera.

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Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 1d

A comic strip titled "Teen Comix" by "Beanson '15"
A boy wearing sunglasses and a t-shirt that says "No Kings" on it is greeted by a friend in the first panel. In the second panel, a closeup of a shirt with a Canadian flag on it can be seen. In the third panel, the boy with the sunglasses's shirt now says "one king."

Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 1d

The interrobang in that post was just 😘👌

Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 1d

Even some of the articles trying to explain the lyrics miss the Bloodhound Gang reference.

Night of the Living Ted Raymond @tedraymond.bsky.social · 1d

I've always wondered what a teenager today listening to The Real Slim Shady would think. We're a quarter-century removed from The Marshall Mathers LP and even further from some of the very specific things and people he mentions, not to mention the context of Eminem himself at the time.