Author | Lightnews

Noah Brand

Noah Brand

@noahbrand.bsky.social

410 followers 140 following 1.9K posts

Pronouns: male. Persona: genially pedantic. Misses: the internet circa 2005.

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Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · Nov 12

This was an interview with me, posted by Sergio Olmos in late July 2020. It got retweeted by Rachel Maddow, which was validating.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 4h

a cartoon of a man holding a microphone

Alt: Rainier Wolfcastle from The Simpsons, saying "That's the joke."

media.tenor.com

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 4h

That's why they need the "There can be only one" thing. Because cool-ass sword fights make for better movies/TV than two guys nodding amiably at each other and sharing an inside joke about someone who's been dead 200 years.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 4h

Sounds to me like Little Timmy's plan worked perfectly.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 4h

Despite Queen Diana's visit and the slamball championships, I am much more concerned about these "Thumb Bandits". I like my thumbs.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 5h

RICHAAAAAAAAAARDS!

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 19h

ICE has just been handed $50 billion with no actual plan of how to spend it. OBVIOUSLY they're being swarmed with sketchy military-industrial salesmen. This is FAR from the dumbest shit they're going to blow money on.

@slacktivistfred.bsky.social wrote well about it: www.patheos.com/blogs/slackt...

Secret Police Slush Fund Is Gonna Be SO Corrupt

All that money makes such a succulent sound. Welcome to the Boomtown.

www.patheos.com

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 21h

"No wonder there's no money in the ghetto... it's all here!"

Little dude just came out and SAID it.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 1d

Portland is bracing for military occupation, but some of us are already looking ahead to a Third Reconstruction, and THIS time we're going to have to really nail the fuckin' thing down.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 1d

I tend to prefer the company of at least moderately sketchy people; folks who've seen and done some shit, you know? People with a PAST.

But if we're talking about elected legislative office, I want a boring, detail-oriented nerd with a law degree and a huge boner for longitudinal studies.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 1d

Since the 1960s?

I don't know exactly HOW, but I'm certain this is somehow the fault of Reed Richards.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 1d

I read that... I'll just say that Graham Ingels was not born to draw cowboys.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 1d

Chuck Dixon's a colossal bigoted prick, but he had his strengths as a writer. Irony was never one of them. Dude wouldn't know irony if it killed his parents in an alleyway.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 1d

I get it. He's smart and kinda mean, but with hints of a decent guy inside. That's traditionally fangirl catnip.

Also, a lot of uptight prudes seem to follow you on this app.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 1d

Both worms look vaguely like Bing Crosby.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 2d

I once bought a "Lager & Lime" flavored condom in England.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 2d

50s-60s Lois Lane is such a fucking bizarre character.

It's like there was an editorial meeting where a bunch of dudes tried to imagine what personality traits a woman might have, got as far as "stupid" and figured that was plenty.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 2d

I am also (probably) alive because of the ACA, and I defend it on that basis.

"Obamacare was a sellout half-measure that doesn't do anything meaningful!"

"Okay, but I consider my existence meaningful."

mr. sardonicus @mmcgrath.bsky.social · 3d

this dickhead didn’t post this to bsky, but fuck you @talsmith.bsky.social . this legislation saved my life. condescending piece of shit.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 3d

VERY difficult not to read that signature on the marginal notes as "Horny Dorian".

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 3d

As a Portland protestor of many years' experience, I endorse this message.

Keith Littlefield @vb-keith.bsky.social · 4d

I think people legitimately don’t understand how much Portland A: hates being told what to do and B: loves any excuse to get fucking weird about it

Reposted by Noah Brand

Kevin M. Kruse @kevinmkruse.bsky.social · 4d

Take note of all these people turning out for protests in small towns in red states.

Remember them the next time you’re inclined to write an area off because “they voted for this.”

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 4d

As ever, they believe that the only job of the police is to shoot people.

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 4d

Catholicism 🤝 Fitness culture
"Sin is only purged from
the body through suffering"

Reposted by Noah Brand

David Bier @davidjbier.bsky.social · 5d

An ICE agent, who is being arrested for drunk driving and nearly killing his little kids & others, tries to stop the arrest by racially profiling the officers arresting him. Amazing to watch the courtesy given to him as he is belligerent and uncooperative

Reposted by Noah Brand

Snowden St. @snowden.st · 6d

To repeat it: the reason why Young Republicans are talking about loving Hitler and FedSoc judges are destroying the jurisprudence is because *they've never in their lives seen someone suffer for promoting those polices*. Not Newt, not Rush Limbaugh, not Scalia or Thomas, no one!

Snowden St. @snowden.st · 6d

i mean it that we won't see a meaningful change in the GOP until folks like this spend the rest of their days in misery, and their kids reject them when they've reached the age. anything less and they'll think their gambits worth it!

Noah Brand @noahbrand.bsky.social · 5d

It's interesting that they're explicitly trying to make themselves look cool by assaulting Americans. White Americans, even!

It seems in keeping with the fundamental promise of Trump 2.0, that he will indiscriminately harm people who Fox News viewers dislike.