Author | Lightnews

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻

@lezbollahmothra.bsky.social

930 followers 700 following 1.3K posts

(Marxist Leninist, Shia, lesbian) (free 🇵🇸) live thru this with me // I swear that I will die for you. Hot takes are mine & do not reflect the views of my cat

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Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · Aug 23

I’m so sorry for everything past Noor said & did while drinking & preemptively sorry for whatever future Noor says & does while drinking.

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Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 10h

Im at the bar drinking alone, what makes u think i WOULDNT play Rush on the jukebox. Come on now.

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 10h

Exactly! I was like “i don’t watch plot heavy stuff while drunk” & he goes “you’ve seen it & it’s pretty straightforward” & im like “ok let me clarify, its always sunny is my top drunk show” & he goes “aahhhh ok i gotchu” 😂😂😂

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 11h

(Earlier)

Me “I just don’t want to rewatch it after ive been drinking is all”
Sean “Noor it’s The Good The Bad & The Ugly, not the Qur’an”

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Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 11h

The only thing that sucks about being at a bar alone is u have no one u trust to watch ur drink if u gotta pee. (Also it’s weird using bar bathrooms to pee instead of do coke, im like “oop peeing in the cocaine room”)

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 1d

This video was clearly made for me personally youtu.be/0CZNHKlH09I?...

The Fantastic World of Monsterf***ers

YouTube video by Tale Foundry

youtu.be

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 2d

Yknow. *hits blunt*

I’ve never seen Trump & Xenu in the same room together is all.

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Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 2d

tbt getting really drunk upon learning nick cave is a raging zionist & chugging vodka & absinthe in the dark while crashing out on 4 different social media sites for 9 hours.

Honestly, still the most understandable noor crashout ever.

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 5d

I feel like such a monster when i let a plant go on my Dustbunny plant game, it’s like im sorry pixels on a screen. I just already have the same plant & space is limited. But awww u just grew a new leaf & u were so excited 😭

I would NEVER survive a COD lobby bruh 💀

Reposted by Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻

Frances "Are You Scared Yet" Meh @francesmeh.reviews · 8d

hacking the chatgpt servers to make all the ai girlfriends friendzone you

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Reposted by Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻

Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 8d

A news anchor on set with a graphic that says "marijuana alert" on it

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Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 7d

the way an Eminem song ended my last relationship bc i sent my ex gf like the 406th video of me drunk & singing & it finally came to “noor oh my god are u ever gonna stop drinking” & i was like “u know what queen, probably not; in fact for ur sake lets just break up”.

She was right & should say it.

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 7d

Exactly, there’s some ppl (my mom, my sister & my beloved nonna only) what i watch my mouth around, everyone else can eat a buffet of dicks. But when im talking to either of them it’s “oh my gosh, that’s so freakin funny” all day 💀

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 7d

Lmao like literally Eminem whole catalog 😭😭😭😂😂😂

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 7d

& before you channel Helen Lovejoy, it is on YOU as parents to manage what YOUR kids are exposed to, not musicians, not internet, YOU. Most music is not in fact made for children & it’s up to PARENTS to uhhh parent. Musicians shouldn’t be expected to cater to LAZY parents. Period

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Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 7d

It should be illegal to expect bands to have “clean” versions of songs ever. People need to grow up. If you can’t handle hearing a cuss word maybe you shouldn’t be alive.

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Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 7d

god im such a Huntr/x stan & it’s not even a real band😭

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 7d

Would i rather kiss an atlas moth or Courtney Love??

Actually shut up, what are u, a cop!?!? I can smooch both, THANK YOU.

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 8d

I live on the top floor (ok it’s a 2 story building but still) & have thus developed a crippling fear of dropping my phone off of my porch any time i’m even close to the edge lmfao.

Reposted by Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻

Soraya Nadia McDonald @sorayanadiamcdonald.com · 9d

"I helped!" meowed Wendy.

Security camera catches cat dropping mouse into human family's dinner

Animal rescuers in California shared security camera stills showing the moment a foster kitten spiced up her human family's dinner with a dead mouse.

www.upi.com

66 260 1.4K

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 9d

👉🏼👈🏼 i was interviewed for this!

www.wired.com/story/when-f...

When Face Recognition Doesn’t Know Your Face Is a Face

An estimated 100 million people live with facial differences. As face recognition tech becomes widespread, some say they’re getting blocked from accessing essential systems and services.

www.wired.com

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Reposted by Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻

Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 10d

RIP Karl Marx you would have loved Dance Dance Revolution

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Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 10d

The cat tax- pet store was out of His Preferred Food so buying new catfood that he hates & refuses to eat even when i bribe him w chicken so having to overnight his regular food.

Lord I wish the pet store had a “picky ass cat” warrantee

Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 13d

NURSE JACKIE IS ON NETFLIX! I LOVE THIS FOR ME

Reposted by Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻

Ragnarok Lobster @eclecticbrotha1.bsky.social · 14d

I'm telling y'all: do not praise the woman who just won the Nobel Peace Prize. She's begging Trump to bring peace to Venezuela by starting a coup.

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Noor ☭ Obi-Wan Cannoli 🔻 @lezbollahmothra.bsky.social · 14d

I like the fact that i can summon autistic nerds by playing Rush on the jukebox at the bar. Yes, come to me, my people. The world shall be ours.