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Joachim Heijndermans

@jheijndermans.bsky.social

7K followers 3K following 12K posts

Writer, artist, filmmaker, designer, comic book letterer, SFWA member and collector of toys. He/him. https://linktr.ee/jheijndermans. http://www.joachimheijndermans.com

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Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · Apr 30

Presenting: the Beautiful Beasts imprint, a series of erotic horror, science fiction and fantasy novellas by author Joachim Heijndermans. Each a self contained story of lust with monsters ranging from the fantastical, the macabre and the eldritch.
Books 1, 2 and 3 are out now!
Art Man Carot

Cover to return the rose, the first Beautiful Beasts book. Colored in monochrome purple, a large beast with a lion-like face and stag antlers embraces a partially undressed woman with long flowing hair. She clutches onto his antlers, wistfully looking at her lover, the beast.

Cover to Cove of the Fisherman's wife. Colored in monochrome blue, a Japanese woman looks upon the encroaching octopus arms. Her yukata is partially removed, as a lone tear runs down her cheek.

Cover to Beautiful Beasts 3, The Nightstalker’s Mark, by Joahim Heijndermans. Two women coated in a red colored hue hold each other in embrace, looking at one another. One a short haired blind woman with a tank top. The other is a vampiric creature who is nude, her ears pointed and the pupils in her eyes are narrow slits like those of a serpent. Her open mouth reveals a set of fangs, her intent implied to be nefarious.
The title of the book is colored with a yellow gradient, with the ‘M’ in Mark similar to a set of fangs. Small dots of Braille writing repeat the title, a reference to the one woman’s blindness.

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Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 8h

Also, because of culture's hyper fixation on the just the famous moments, we'd never get Marilyn in her vulnerable, emotional and heart wrenching moments (Misfits) but just the dress scene from 7 year itch, over and over and over and over and over. Cuz that's all the machine will have gobbled up.

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 9h

That was a postman disguised as a DHL delivery person.
No DHL'er alive would deliver a package on time, in the right place.
DHL trucks are just filled with paper 'you weren't home so fuck you' notes.

Reposted by Joachim Heijndermans

Valiant 🏳️‍⚧️ | Follow BOOM Goes the Bride on Backerkit! @valwrites.ca · 9h

Plz to make high quality print book a reality tyty

Get Ready for BOOM goes the Bride

From Valiant Evermech - Get Ready for BOOM goes the Bride

www.backerkit.com

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Reposted by Joachim Heijndermans

Zoe TunnHELL @zoewithasword.bsky.social · 20h

Hey #PortfolioDay!

I'm Zoe Tunnell. Written for BOOM, Marvel, IDW, Dark Horse and Tiny Onion on originals like BLADE MAIDENS as well as licensed properties like GODZILLA, POWER RANGERS, BLACK CAT and more! I've got projects set for 2026 but am still open for work!

Zoetunnellwrites @ Gmail dot com

The game art variant to Power Rangers: Rita's Rewind

Lucas Werneck's cover for Marvel United: A Pride Special

Dani Pendergast's cover for Godzilla Valentine’s Day Special

Valentine M. Smith's cover for Blade Maidens

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Reposted by Joachim Heijndermans

Jodie Troutman @longtalljodie.com · 9h

Hi: I'm Jodie and I letter comics for basically every publisher. Said books notably include a bunch of Star Trek for IDW and the upcoming volume 2 of Galaxy for DC. Also pretty much anything @cerealpancake.bsky.social or @charliestickney.bsky.social ask me to do. longtalljodie.com #portfolioday

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Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 9h

Also, I think in general fiction needs more characters masturbating.

Sometimes you just have time to kill.

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 9h

OH, then have I a book for you!!!

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Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 9h

Expecting a package from DHL, which means a 97,5% chance that their 'we'll be there between time x and time y' really translates to 'get fucked you stupid simpleton shopper, we'll skip your ass even if you're home'.

Place your bets now folks. Will I get the package, or will I get DHL'ed?

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Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 9h

And let's not forget my writing portfolio for #portfolioday!
I've written short sci fi, horror, fantasy, erotica and a mix of all the aforementioned. My short fiction has been published in a slew of magazines, most recently with @nygelmag.bsky.social. I've also been adapted to comics, TV and Film!

Cover for Nygel 1, not your grans erotic lit, featuring a pink suit of space armor with green tentacles slithering out.

Cover to Gods Untold, a Paganini anthology, featuring a massive sea serpent peering between its coils at a child in a yellow coat walking across water, with a. child in a red coat rowing on a raft in the front.

Poster for Love, Death + Robots vol 2, for Netflix, featuring a heart, and x and a robot in many colors

Poster for Total Loss, with a bald man sitting forlornly in a car.

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Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 10h

Alternative suggestion: look up BAD smut. You'll realize you can do better…and then that knowledge might motivate you (it did for me)

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 10h

During my cross-atlantic move, I wrote very little, so don't beat yourself up if progress stalls for a bit. It'll come back to you.

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 10h

We're hitting the final 24 hours on this ADHD Awereness sale. Get in on that book bundely goodness!

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 2d

ADHD Awareness month is still going strong, as is the Itch bundle of books by ADHD authors and featuring ADHD characters. My book, Rage from a Cage, is in there too.

Find the bundle here:

itch.io/b/3300/adhd-...

Adhd Awareness Month Fiction.
By mostly ADHD authors, most with 1+ significant ADHD character(s)
22 Book. Oct 1st-15th

Covers:
The Lady and the List, Elizabeth Briars
Side Tracked, S.K. Kelly
The Harmony of Falling Snow, Andora Brokaw
Bestiary Beas
The Players Act 1, Amy Sparks
The Weight of Her Gaze, RJ Martin
He of the Trees, Rob Macwolf
Song of the Wolf, T.C. Smith
Tales of Yamato, Odessa Silver
The Erstwhile Tyler Kyle, Steve Hugh Westenra
Manipulator's War, Elise Carlson
A Demon to Save Me, H.S. Kallinger
Heart of Stone, Johannes T. Evans
Lantern, Burgundy Athena Pendragon
Wizard's Debt, Niranjan
Blood, D.C. Hart
Ancient as the Stars, Maya Darjani
A Dark Hole Darly, Drew Melbourne
Translucent, Wayward Spark
War of the Space Dargons, L'Poni Baldwin
Ants Waking, R.J. Huneke
Rage in a Cage, Joachim Heijndermans

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Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 10h

Ooooh, Hawkgirl!

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 10h

Nightcrawler, Colossus, Sunspot, Banshee, Maggot, Fantomex, Beak, Psylocke and Wolfsbane sit down excitedly for the World Cup.

Professor X pulls the tv power cord out of the wall.

"None of THAT. To me, my X-men. Back to baseball."

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 10h

For a team with so many international members, it's weird to me the one sport they always play is baseball. (And if its a metaphor for integration, it feels weird that cultural exchange is so one way…even for a story where the uggo's are sent into the sewers)

Cyclops of the uncanny x-men, playing baseball

Bishop, Nightcrawler and Emma Frost of the Uncanny X-men, playing baseball still.

The uncanny x-men, playing baseball yet again.

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Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 10h

Gorgeous!!!

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 10h

Oh, and off course, find me at my website here:

www.joachimheijndermans.com

www.joachimheijndermans.com

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 10h

It's #portfolioday! My name is Joachim. I write, draw, design and more, alternating between illustrations, comics narrative pages, comics lettering and all that. Below, some examples of work!

Illustrations of the characters from the cartoon Rick and Morty, with Morty, a teenage boy in a yellow shirt, shooting a gun at a monstrous beast joined by his sister Summer, a young woman with a pink top and rattling gun, and mister Poopybutthole, a little man with a top hat. Their drunken grandfather Rick lies on a rock cradling a gamecube and a bottle of wine, while a blue man mister meeseeks snuggles with a tentacled beast. Around them, a plethora of weird aliens encroach on them.

A black and white illustration of Shin Godzilla, a tumor infested kaiju, screaming in agony.

Cover to sharp dreams: 01, comics by Joachim Heijndermans, featuring Ice Pack, a story with a pack of wolves and a three eyed robot. Also included the last walk to 7-7-0, with a woman in a space suit, and the red wind, with a robot battling a purple kaiju

Cover the sharp Dreams: 02, comics by Joachim Heijndermans, featuring Smiles, a story with a woman with short hair, a scar and a gun in her hand, while a grinning being looms over her. Also includes Ice Pack, a story with a three eyed robot, and Monster Max, a story with a monster wearing a skull.

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Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 12h

Me: "Fireworks are stupid"

Coworker: "Its part our culture!"

Me: "Congrats, its a stupid part of the culture."

I don't think my coworkers care for my company.

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Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 12h

I dont regret doing ARC for my last smutty book. I had some takers who left reviews and people who kindly demured when it wasnt their jam.

My short story collection had only 2 sign ups, so I guess to niche a book for ARCs

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 18h

Eeeeeekkkkkk!!!!

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 20h

Animation is not a dry run to see if it works as a "real" movie, and "this actor could be this animated character in live action" is a conversation best left on early 2000s chat rooms or Screenrant, not board meetings.

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 23h

That lady with the wings from the Authority?

Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 1d

Spite helps me write smut. Does that help?

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Joachim Heijndermans @jheijndermans.bsky.social · 1d

Is that him on the box???

Two balding yellow men, one with glasses and blue eyebrow, stand before a building called Moe's, with the right man laughing at a broken cassette tape while the blue haired man looks downtrodden.