Dustin Quillen
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen
@dustinquillen.bsky.social
360 followers 170 following 1.7K posts
Writer, father, and three-time heavyweight champion of quitting social media
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · Apr 30
Exciting news! From now on we’re putting Seaman from the 2000 Sega Dreamcast game Seaman in charge of everything. He’ll grade your kid’s papers. He’s gonna interpret your ultrasound results. All information will flow through Seaman. And before you ask: YES! He will cost us all trillions of dollars!
Seaman is a fish with a humanoid face and a big weird tube growing from his head.
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 5h
Give me a choice between a country overrun with drug smugglers and one overrun with government-sanctioned death squads and I am picking the drug guys ten out of ten times
dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 5h
"Friends" is a beloved American sitcom that aired from 1994 to 2004, following six young adults-Rachel, Ross, Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe - living in New York City. The show explores their friendships, romances, careers, and personal growth over ten seasons.
Peacemaker season two main cast. From left to right: Judo Master, Langston Fleury, Vigilante, Leota Adebayo, Peacemaker, and Emilia Harcourt
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 7h
Another life tragically cut short by gorilla methamphetamine
Vanity Fair headline which reads “Jane Goodall’s Cause of Death Revealed”
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 1d
Love it when Amazon sends an email like, “Hey! On the off chance you are now the type of guy who only buys Freddy Krueger gloves, why don’t you take a look at all these other Freddy Krueger gloves!”
dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 1d
Where is the proof these ships were bound for the U.S. or that they were carrying drugs? And even we take the administration on their word for both of those, how does that justify use of military force thousands of miles outside our borders? None of this constitutes a crime punishable by death!
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 2d
I dunno, the part where the guy makes out with his sister seems right up his alley
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 2d
Darth Vader, famously one of the Good Guys
atrupar.com Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 2d
Trump: "We have Darth Vader. You know Darth Vader, right? Darth Vader is a man who is sitting -- is that Darth? Stand up please. Does everybody know -- they call him Darth Vader, I call him a fine man. But he's cutting Democrat priorities and they're never gonna get them back."
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 2d
I just realized I have never played this. Popping it on the list
dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 2d
It is hilarious to me that Pokémon games continue to give you dialogue options when the choices are always like:

•Yes.

•Sure.

•Yes!
dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 3d
If the argument is “we don’t see how Ben Solo is alive” I have an easy solution for them: that movie where he died was a pile of shit everyone should just forget about anyway
dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 3d
Activating Detective Vision so I can reconstruct the crime scene that resulted in me finding Mjolnir on the floor next to my toilet
It’s Mjolnir, hammer of the mighty Thor! I don’t know why it was on my bathroom floor!
dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 4d
Diplomatic relations have once again broken down in the Sunny Spot territories of the Couch
dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 4d
An extremely stupid-looking rooster with long, black feathers jutting out from his head in every direction. Despite being a prey animal, his gaze is that of a predator.
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 4d
He looks like the ghost of a 19th-century hypnotist who was tarred and feathered before being run out of town
dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 4d
Stumbled upon this at the library and you could not get me to read it for anything less than high six figures

Booky Wook

BOOKY WOOK
It’s a copy of Russell Brand’s #1 international bestselling book My Booky Wook: A Memoir of Sex, Drugs, and Stand-Up. A greyscale photo of him adorns the cover; he looks like a feather boa that was discarded on the floor of a strip club bathroom and gained sentience. Presumably this will serve as Exhibit A in his pending rape trial.
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 5d
lol I just realized that channels is called “UnSoul’d”
dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 5d
These AI sludge channels are just embarrassing when people like Mac Glocky are out there legitimately doing The Work when it comes to weird cover versions of songs: m.youtube.com/c/MacGlocky
mac glocky
Mgmt: [email protected]
m.youtube.com
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 6d
Ah shit, I had planned on doing this and then instinctively bought the Switch 2 version. Oh well
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 7d
We have a Virginia creeper growing on our deck and it is a magnet for these invasive bastards. They’d actually be kind of pretty (for a bug) if they didn’t show up by the thousands.

Spraying our vines down with neem oil over two summers seems to have eliminated the swarm. Maybe give that a go.
Photo of a Japanese beetle. It has a shiny, pearlescent green carapace with copper colored wings. I despise them.
dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 7d
It is once again that time of year where I search Amazon for negative reviews of Michael Myers masks with accompanying photos
Picture of a pink, Hello Kitty-themed twin bed. Half a dozen stuffed Hello Kitty dolls are scattered across it. Tucked cozily into the blankets is a figure wearing a bootleg mask of Michael Myers from the Halloween films; his face is, inexplicably, charcoal black instead of the traditional white.
dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 8d
Admittedly this would take up a lot of bumper space
dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 8d
Bumper sticker on a Tesla that says, “I bought this AFTER Elon went CRAZY because I am a NIGHTMARE PERSON whose ENTIRE IDENTITY is wrapped up in a FASCIST PYRAMID SCHEME! Also, I am RECENTLY SINGLE and looking to MINGLE!”
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Reposted by Dustin Quillen
byctom.bsky.social
BYCTOM @byctom.bsky.social · 9d
this is the most like a mike tyson's punch out guy i have ever seen anyone look
Brewers outfielder Sal Frelick making an intense face as he prepares to throw the ball
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 9d
I was just thinking about how the only thing I’ve done with mine after I plugged it in was close the lens.
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dustinquillen.bsky.social
Dustin Quillen @dustinquillen.bsky.social · 9d
If someone ever breaks into my home I plan to defend myself with the Doom Patrol omnibus
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