Bill Fogarty
@wjfog.bsky.social
TODAY IS NATIONAL ROOTS DAY!
It is interesting how we use plants as metaphor for family.
Some people talk about their family as roots, others see a tree and its branches, while some envision a cactus and all the pricks.
It is interesting how we use plants as metaphor for family.
Some people talk about their family as roots, others see a tree and its branches, while some envision a cactus and all the pricks.
December 23, 2025 at 1:06 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL ROOTS DAY!
It is interesting how we use plants as metaphor for family.
Some people talk about their family as roots, others see a tree and its branches, while some envision a cactus and all the pricks.
It is interesting how we use plants as metaphor for family.
Some people talk about their family as roots, others see a tree and its branches, while some envision a cactus and all the pricks.
TODAY IS NATIONAL FOREFATHERS' DAY!
Some people have a problem with a family having two dads but are perfectly accepting of their own forefathers.
Some people have a problem with a family having two dads but are perfectly accepting of their own forefathers.
December 22, 2025 at 3:36 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL FOREFATHERS' DAY!
Some people have a problem with a family having two dads but are perfectly accepting of their own forefathers.
Some people have a problem with a family having two dads but are perfectly accepting of their own forefathers.
TODAY IS YULE, THE WINTER SOLSTICE!
I am preparing by washing my holiday clothes in Yule Tide.
I am preparing by washing my holiday clothes in Yule Tide.
December 21, 2025 at 2:20 PM
TODAY IS YULE, THE WINTER SOLSTICE!
I am preparing by washing my holiday clothes in Yule Tide.
I am preparing by washing my holiday clothes in Yule Tide.
TODAY IS NATIONAL GO CAROLING DAY!
My wife asked me, “Do you know how much it is to rent a church caroling group?”
I said, “Do you mean a choir?”
She said, “Fine, yes, do you know how much it is to acquire a church caroling group?”
My wife asked me, “Do you know how much it is to rent a church caroling group?”
I said, “Do you mean a choir?”
She said, “Fine, yes, do you know how much it is to acquire a church caroling group?”
December 20, 2025 at 3:36 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL GO CAROLING DAY!
My wife asked me, “Do you know how much it is to rent a church caroling group?”
I said, “Do you mean a choir?”
She said, “Fine, yes, do you know how much it is to acquire a church caroling group?”
My wife asked me, “Do you know how much it is to rent a church caroling group?”
I said, “Do you mean a choir?”
She said, “Fine, yes, do you know how much it is to acquire a church caroling group?”
TODAY IS NATIONAL UGLY CHRISTMAS SWEATER DAY!
I bought an ugly Christmas sweater that is constantly picking up static electricity and zapping me. I decided to return it to the store.
They gave me another one free of charge.
I bought an ugly Christmas sweater that is constantly picking up static electricity and zapping me. I decided to return it to the store.
They gave me another one free of charge.
December 19, 2025 at 2:08 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL UGLY CHRISTMAS SWEATER DAY!
I bought an ugly Christmas sweater that is constantly picking up static electricity and zapping me. I decided to return it to the store.
They gave me another one free of charge.
I bought an ugly Christmas sweater that is constantly picking up static electricity and zapping me. I decided to return it to the store.
They gave me another one free of charge.
TODAY IS NATIONAL RE-GIFTING DAY!
Last Christmas I gave you my heart.
The very next day you gave it away.
Clearly, someone doesn't understand the rules of re-gifting.
Last Christmas I gave you my heart.
The very next day you gave it away.
Clearly, someone doesn't understand the rules of re-gifting.
December 18, 2025 at 3:06 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL RE-GIFTING DAY!
Last Christmas I gave you my heart.
The very next day you gave it away.
Clearly, someone doesn't understand the rules of re-gifting.
Last Christmas I gave you my heart.
The very next day you gave it away.
Clearly, someone doesn't understand the rules of re-gifting.
TODAY IS NATIONAL SAY IT NOW DAY!
I don’t mean to sound Old Fashioned, but I’ve got to say it:
One and a half ounces of Bourbon, one sugar cube, two dashes of angostura bitters, and a few dashes of plain water.
I don’t mean to sound Old Fashioned, but I’ve got to say it:
One and a half ounces of Bourbon, one sugar cube, two dashes of angostura bitters, and a few dashes of plain water.
December 17, 2025 at 2:55 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL SAY IT NOW DAY!
I don’t mean to sound Old Fashioned, but I’ve got to say it:
One and a half ounces of Bourbon, one sugar cube, two dashes of angostura bitters, and a few dashes of plain water.
I don’t mean to sound Old Fashioned, but I’ve got to say it:
One and a half ounces of Bourbon, one sugar cube, two dashes of angostura bitters, and a few dashes of plain water.
TODAY IS THE DAY IN 1908 THAT THE FIRST CREDIT UNION OPENED AND ALSO MY WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!
Coincidentally, I got married at my credit union but no one showed up to the ceremony.
Low interest.
Coincidentally, I got married at my credit union but no one showed up to the ceremony.
Low interest.
December 16, 2025 at 3:35 PM
TODAY IS THE DAY IN 1908 THAT THE FIRST CREDIT UNION OPENED AND ALSO MY WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!
Coincidentally, I got married at my credit union but no one showed up to the ceremony.
Low interest.
Coincidentally, I got married at my credit union but no one showed up to the ceremony.
Low interest.
TODAY IS CAT HERDERS DAY!
While it is difficult to herd cats, it is easy to get them to stand single file.
They are felines.
While it is difficult to herd cats, it is easy to get them to stand single file.
They are felines.
December 15, 2025 at 6:31 PM
TODAY IS CAT HERDERS DAY!
While it is difficult to herd cats, it is easy to get them to stand single file.
They are felines.
While it is difficult to herd cats, it is easy to get them to stand single file.
They are felines.
TODAY IS MONKEY DAY!
I share an Amazon account with a monkey.
We are prime mates.
I share an Amazon account with a monkey.
We are prime mates.
December 14, 2025 at 7:43 PM
TODAY IS MONKEY DAY!
I share an Amazon account with a monkey.
We are prime mates.
I share an Amazon account with a monkey.
We are prime mates.
TODAY IS NATIONAL VIOLIN DAY!
I play the Violin but not seriously. It's just something I fiddle with.
I play the Violin but not seriously. It's just something I fiddle with.
December 13, 2025 at 2:08 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL VIOLIN DAY!
I play the Violin but not seriously. It's just something I fiddle with.
I play the Violin but not seriously. It's just something I fiddle with.
TODAY IS NATIONAL SALESPERSON DAY!
A friend of mine is a keyboard percussionist by night and a gun salesperson by day. She goes from glockenspiel to Glock and spiel.
A friend of mine is a keyboard percussionist by night and a gun salesperson by day. She goes from glockenspiel to Glock and spiel.
December 12, 2025 at 2:23 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL SALESPERSON DAY!
A friend of mine is a keyboard percussionist by night and a gun salesperson by day. She goes from glockenspiel to Glock and spiel.
A friend of mine is a keyboard percussionist by night and a gun salesperson by day. She goes from glockenspiel to Glock and spiel.
TODAY IS NATIONAL STRETCHING DAY!
I went to the gym today. I spent 20 minutes bending, stretching and pulling.
When that was done my gym clothes were finally on and I could start my workout.
I went to the gym today. I spent 20 minutes bending, stretching and pulling.
When that was done my gym clothes were finally on and I could start my workout.
December 11, 2025 at 5:07 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL STRETCHING DAY!
I went to the gym today. I spent 20 minutes bending, stretching and pulling.
When that was done my gym clothes were finally on and I could start my workout.
I went to the gym today. I spent 20 minutes bending, stretching and pulling.
When that was done my gym clothes were finally on and I could start my workout.
TODAY IS NATIONAL LAGER DAY!
When I was growing up, my Mom and Dad made me bathe in Australian lager because they were my foster parents.
When I was growing up, my Mom and Dad made me bathe in Australian lager because they were my foster parents.
December 10, 2025 at 1:55 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL LAGER DAY!
When I was growing up, my Mom and Dad made me bathe in Australian lager because they were my foster parents.
When I was growing up, my Mom and Dad made me bathe in Australian lager because they were my foster parents.
TODAY IS NATIONAL PASTRY DAY!
My favorite pastry is a synonym roll because it is yummy, tasty, and delicious.
My favorite pastry is a synonym roll because it is yummy, tasty, and delicious.
December 9, 2025 at 4:18 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL PASTRY DAY!
My favorite pastry is a synonym roll because it is yummy, tasty, and delicious.
My favorite pastry is a synonym roll because it is yummy, tasty, and delicious.
TODAY IS NATIONAL BROWNIE DAY!
The first time I made brownies was in my easy bake oven in 1987.
They are finally done if anyone wants one.
The first time I made brownies was in my easy bake oven in 1987.
They are finally done if anyone wants one.
December 8, 2025 at 2:37 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL BROWNIE DAY!
The first time I made brownies was in my easy bake oven in 1987.
They are finally done if anyone wants one.
The first time I made brownies was in my easy bake oven in 1987.
They are finally done if anyone wants one.
TODAY IS NATIONAL COTTON CANDY DAY!
My wife said, "I really want some cotton candy, some fried foods, and I want to ride a Ferris wheel. Where can we do that?"
I said, "That's a fair question."
My wife said, "I really want some cotton candy, some fried foods, and I want to ride a Ferris wheel. Where can we do that?"
I said, "That's a fair question."
December 7, 2025 at 5:30 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL COTTON CANDY DAY!
My wife said, "I really want some cotton candy, some fried foods, and I want to ride a Ferris wheel. Where can we do that?"
I said, "That's a fair question."
My wife said, "I really want some cotton candy, some fried foods, and I want to ride a Ferris wheel. Where can we do that?"
I said, "That's a fair question."
TODAY IS NATIONAL MINER'S DAY!
I worked as a miner for less than one day.
When I reported for my first shift, the foreman pointed to a row of shovels and told me to take my pick.
I worked as a miner for less than one day.
When I reported for my first shift, the foreman pointed to a row of shovels and told me to take my pick.
December 6, 2025 at 7:56 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL MINER'S DAY!
I worked as a miner for less than one day.
When I reported for my first shift, the foreman pointed to a row of shovels and told me to take my pick.
I worked as a miner for less than one day.
When I reported for my first shift, the foreman pointed to a row of shovels and told me to take my pick.
TODAY IS NATIONAL BARTENDER DAY!
The last time I was in a bar I ordered Rum and Coke. The bartender asked if Pepsi was ok. I said sure.
So he made me a Pepsi and Coke.
The last time I was in a bar I ordered Rum and Coke. The bartender asked if Pepsi was ok. I said sure.
So he made me a Pepsi and Coke.
December 5, 2025 at 3:15 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL BARTENDER DAY!
The last time I was in a bar I ordered Rum and Coke. The bartender asked if Pepsi was ok. I said sure.
So he made me a Pepsi and Coke.
The last time I was in a bar I ordered Rum and Coke. The bartender asked if Pepsi was ok. I said sure.
So he made me a Pepsi and Coke.
TODAY IS SANTA'S LIST DAY!
Santa does a lot of things to determine which list you are on, the Naughty List or the Nice List. He has even been reading all your social media posts.
Most of you are getting dictionaries for Christmas.
Santa does a lot of things to determine which list you are on, the Naughty List or the Nice List. He has even been reading all your social media posts.
Most of you are getting dictionaries for Christmas.
December 4, 2025 at 2:04 PM
TODAY IS SANTA'S LIST DAY!
Santa does a lot of things to determine which list you are on, the Naughty List or the Nice List. He has even been reading all your social media posts.
Most of you are getting dictionaries for Christmas.
Santa does a lot of things to determine which list you are on, the Naughty List or the Nice List. He has even been reading all your social media posts.
Most of you are getting dictionaries for Christmas.
TODAY IS NATIONAL ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD DAY!
My wife thinks it will be expensive to replace our roof. I told her that I thought the roofer would say it was free. When she asked why, I told her that the roof, after all, was "on the house."
My wife thinks it will be expensive to replace our roof. I told her that I thought the roofer would say it was free. When she asked why, I told her that the roof, after all, was "on the house."
December 3, 2025 at 5:43 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD DAY!
My wife thinks it will be expensive to replace our roof. I told her that I thought the roofer would say it was free. When she asked why, I told her that the roof, after all, was "on the house."
My wife thinks it will be expensive to replace our roof. I told her that I thought the roofer would say it was free. When she asked why, I told her that the roof, after all, was "on the house."
TODAY IS NATIONAL MUTT DAY!
My wife told me she had adopted a pure-bred German shepherd, retired police dog. The dog she brought into the house, however, was (to be kind) a mutt.
When I said so, she replied, "You don't understand. He's undercover."
My wife told me she had adopted a pure-bred German shepherd, retired police dog. The dog she brought into the house, however, was (to be kind) a mutt.
When I said so, she replied, "You don't understand. He's undercover."
December 2, 2025 at 5:36 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL MUTT DAY!
My wife told me she had adopted a pure-bred German shepherd, retired police dog. The dog she brought into the house, however, was (to be kind) a mutt.
When I said so, she replied, "You don't understand. He's undercover."
My wife told me she had adopted a pure-bred German shepherd, retired police dog. The dog she brought into the house, however, was (to be kind) a mutt.
When I said so, she replied, "You don't understand. He's undercover."
TODAY IS NATIONAL EAT A RED APPLE DAY!
My Grandma always used to say, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away."
I don't know if it's true or one of Granny's myths.
My Grandma always used to say, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away."
I don't know if it's true or one of Granny's myths.
December 1, 2025 at 5:11 PM
TODAY IS NATIONAL EAT A RED APPLE DAY!
My Grandma always used to say, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away."
I don't know if it's true or one of Granny's myths.
My Grandma always used to say, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away."
I don't know if it's true or one of Granny's myths.
TODAY IS NATIONAL SECONDHAND SUNDAY!
Wearing a second hand hairpiece may seem kind of gross but it's a small price toupee.
Wearing a second hand hairpiece may seem kind of gross but it's a small price toupee.
December 1, 2025 at 2:52 AM
TODAY IS NATIONAL SECONDHAND SUNDAY!
Wearing a second hand hairpiece may seem kind of gross but it's a small price toupee.
Wearing a second hand hairpiece may seem kind of gross but it's a small price toupee.
TODAY IS ELECTRONIC GREETINGS DAY!
I think it's funny when I get e-mail from my southern family. I get to Reply Y'all.
I think it's funny when I get e-mail from my southern family. I get to Reply Y'all.
November 30, 2025 at 1:48 AM
TODAY IS ELECTRONIC GREETINGS DAY!
I think it's funny when I get e-mail from my southern family. I get to Reply Y'all.
I think it's funny when I get e-mail from my southern family. I get to Reply Y'all.