technically this is from an AU where Summer is the Crystal Exarch but like. she's really just kind of feeding on the vibes that were already there with an added layer of "willing to summon a primal to get her shit done" crazy

There should also be Mario Teaches Typing mode where G'raha Tia is always supportive of you even if you mess up, the way that Mario canonically never discourages you even if you suck at typing.

He's an all-rounder, he can be the tutorial hype man!!

"can someone please just run me unsynced through - " YES I CAN. THERE IS NOTHING I WOULD LIKE MORE. STAY BEHIND ME LIL HOMIE U ARE SAFE WITH ME NOW

I've said it before and I stand by it: Tural isn't a nation, it's a series of showpieces set up to masquerade as a civilization. They're no more believable than an IKEA display bedroom purporting to be a place where someone lives. And it's such a shame given what the game has delivered before.

No one dislikes anything that anyone does in the DT quests. All efforts are met with essentially immediate acceptance and open arms. No one overcomes any actual hardship or faces any particular stakes; the plot only advances because their actions aren't immediate and time passes.

And even within those questlines, there's no abrasion or conflict. Alpa and Ronitt had to prove themselves against a time limit set by an elder. Maru and Trna had to build trust from the ground up because they were teen street racing thugs. Stigma-4 was still a war machine despite slinging coffee.

Blue Pelupelu didn't have a personality, she had (abacus noise) as her entire distinguishing feature. Gathering was A Local Guy and A Foreign Nerd and that's literally it. Fahrafahr doesn't have a single unique or even individualized personality trait; she's just Blue Armor.

For the combat quests there was...blue Pelupelu? And then the gathering quests was a Mamool Ja guy from the not-Hoobigo or Boonewa variant, and then Fahrafar who is just. Blue again. All just generically earnest, unremarkable, indistinct, forgettable quest NPCs.

Thinking back to the various Allied Society quests I've played (mostly in ShB and EW), every one of them had notable, relatable, charming NPCs whose personalities and quirks I can instantly recall - Tyr Beq, Ronitt, Maru and Trna, Dreamingway, Stigma-4 - but the same really can't be said for DT.

setting aside the garbage controls and nonsensical hit detection, you genuinely spend longer in unskippable cutscenes than you do actually playing the mindless "game"

Citation: sometimes I make the curtains blue because in the cadence of the sentence I'm writing a one-syllable color word fits better than a two-syllable one. It could've been "red" but I used an "oo" sound earlier in the sentence and "blue" would echo that. IDGAF about symbolism I just like sounds.

Me forever tapping the "Watsonian vs. Doylist Analysis" sign because I guarantee that unless the author themselves explicitly states why they did a thing in the work, there is absolutely no certain way to know Why They Did It and critics are on some level just being literature astrologists.

bonus estinien:

estinien: come with me. into an empty bedroom. and close the door

y'shtola: something must be wrong

urianger: something must be wrong

thancred: hot

y'shtola: i'm playing hard to get. i'm desirable. i'm a challenge. i'm worth the effort

urianger: she hateth me

thancred: oh yeah she's pissed

urianger: now hath i stared significantly at mine object of affection for near half a bell, adoringly, so as to conveyeth mine heartfelt intentions

y'shtola: urianger must be thinking really hard he's zoning out

thancred: fuck what'd i do now he's glaring

thancred: i would absolutely have sex with you

y'shtola: ugh so he definitely doesn't want to have sex with me

urianger: what couldst he meaneth by this