Elizabeth Sampat
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twoscooters.bsky.social
Elizabeth Sampat
@twoscooters.bsky.social
5.8K followers 360 following 3.7K posts
Playful.

elizabethsampat.com
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twoscooters.bsky.social
Suddenly remembered Spaghetti To Go, this drive-thru pasta restaurant near where I lived in second or third grade. Their whole deal was that you could buy like, a gallon of spaghetti in meat sauce Or fettuccine alfredo for your family and it would come in a big plastic bucket with a handle.
A 6 or 7 year old boy wearing sunglasses and a backwards cap. He is wrapped in an American flag. Behind him is - you guessed it - a second, larger American flag.
November 29, 2025 at 4:50 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
This is a Viking. The photo doesn't do it justice scale-wise. It's a battered, deep-fried meatball the size of a softball. It comes on a stick. You eat it with mustard. Last I heard only two members of The Sons Of Norway have the recipe and you can only get it from their booth at the fair.
November 19, 2025 at 11:09 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Logging on for six to eight hours of video meetings every weekday
BTS photo from the filming of Lord Of The Rings. Sir Ian McKellen is in full costume and makeup as Gandalf, looking old AF, and is hunched over his macbook. He looks super old, tired, and a little sad
November 13, 2025 at 11:19 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Girl who’s going to be okay:
“File not found” error message
November 12, 2025 at 12:16 AM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Computers were a mistake. I'm going to go die now
A popup warning in the application Final Cut Pro that says "The document "CurrentVersion.fcpevent" could not be opened. Final Cut Pro cannoy ope files in the "Final Cut Pro Event" format. There is an OK button. It is not okay.
November 9, 2025 at 9:35 AM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Nightnight
A Zohran-esque meme that says BED for ELIZABETH
November 9, 2025 at 12:40 AM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Lord, I see what you have done for others
A screenshot of a video captioned THE CREATORS OF MAGIC: THE GATHERING WERE SO BUSY, RANDOM PEOPLE WHO WEREN’T EMPLOYEES GOT ON THEIR PAYROLL
October 31, 2025 at 8:33 AM
twoscooters.bsky.social
My subconscious is out here inventing new forms of Economic Anxiety
Dreamt I applied for this job and when I got there it was an “AI training” job for a startup, but I needed the money so I stayed for the interview. Turned out the way it worked is that the founder had somehow made this dolphin hyper-intelligent and the dolphin was supposed to implant a chip in my brain that would basically let the AI learn how humans think in order to mimic it better. But the guy thought I was overpaid and didn’t like that my previous experience was in the game industry So I desperately tried to explain all the transferable skills I’d gotten from 15 years of making games and how it made me the ideal candidate for a dolphin to perform brain surgery on until I woke up
October 15, 2025 at 7:34 AM
twoscooters.bsky.social
This is absolutely not what he said? I think you need to check your sources. (Also, his definition of empathy here is incorrect.)
even in Arizona. It is now a race where Blake Masters is in striking distance. Kari Lake is doing very, very well. The new communications strategy is not to do what Bill Clinton used to do, where he would say, "I feel your pain." Instead, it is to say, "You're actually not in pain." So let's just, little, very short clip. Bill Clinton in the 1990s. It was all about empathy and sympathy. I can't stand the word empathy, actually. I think empathy is a made-up, new age term that — it does a lot of damage. But, it is very effective when it comes to politics. Sympathy, I prefer more than empathy. That's a separate topic for a different time.
September 14, 2025 at 6:33 AM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Using one photo already on your phone, what is the announcement at 2?
September 2, 2025 at 7:47 AM
twoscooters.bsky.social
This Doctor-TJ-Eckleburg-ass encouragement of my mid-life crisis must end
An empty building with the word BANGS in large letters at the top
July 26, 2025 at 12:04 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Being married to me is fun
A text message conversation between Adam and me. Adam: Do you need me to come back? Me: How much of your workout do you have left Adam: Most of it Me: I can maybe wake up a kid if | can remember which one isn't afraid of spiders Adam: But I can just come back It's Gwen hah Me: Okay I'll see if she can help Mostly it's that it's just inside the shower stall so I can't turn off the water and I know that wasting water makes you mad Imao I'm so sorry it's just so big Let me see if I can wake her up Me: Let me see if I can wake her up Like even you would say "that's a moderately sized spider" It's not one of the vaguely friendly looking round ones, it's the kind where the legs are all angles and thick and the body is big Adam: I'm just going to head back Me: NO let me wake up Gwen It's so stupid that I'm this scared of spiders You have a life Adam: I just don't want my wife scared! Me: Let me see if Gwen can help Gwen is on the case "Let me grab a paper towel and I'll see what I can do" She got the water off at least Adam: I just don't want my wife scared! Me: Let me see if Gwen can help Gwen is on the case "Let me grab a paper towel and I'll see what I can do" She got the water off at least SHE GOT IT IT PUT UP A FIGHT I SAW IT FROM HERE She's also doing the litter box because Shiri did a huge liquid nasty poop right before all this Gwen is a true American/ British hero Your workout is saved babe ...after all that I decided not to take a shower
July 13, 2025 at 7:49 AM
twoscooters.bsky.social
who wants to see a dead body
..."However, regrettably, the former leadership abandoned the responsibilities entrusted to them. Subnautica 2 was originally planned for an Early Access launch in early 2024, but the timeline has since been significantly delayed. KRAFTON made multiple requests to Charlie and Max to resume their roles as Game Director and Technical Director, respectively, but both declined to do so. In particular, following the failure of Moonbreaker, KRAFTON asked Charlie to devote himself to the development of Subnautica 2. However, instead of participating in the game development, he chose to focus on a personal film project." - an actual fucking release by KRAFTON
July 11, 2025 at 7:16 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Now that our youngest is 16 and independent and wants to be out late with friends, Adam has adopted a new parenting motto
A text screenshot. Adam: if you die you die Child: YAYYYY
June 26, 2025 at 9:16 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Just saw this in the Americans in Copenhagen FB group and… we’re so cooked, man
Hey Americans in Copenhagen, I had a weird experience at Boston Logan Airport yesterday after flying in from Copenhagen. For context, I'm an American-born US citizen who has been living in Denmark for 3 years on a student visa. I have no other citizenship and no criminal record. When I made it to the border control desk to show my passport, the man working at the counter asked me all of the usual questions at first- what do you do in Denmark, etc.- but then out of nowhere, asked me what l "thought about the current president" ...?!? I sort of panicked in the moment because that wasn't something I was expecting to be asked... So I just said that I was neutral because I no longer lived in the US, and he let me go. Needless to say that was really weird and obviously freaked me out. Just thought l'd pass this along in case anybody is planning a trip over there anytime soon.
June 25, 2025 at 1:10 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
This is the only pic I can still find of Sheena. She was MY cat. She was a sweet angel baby princess to me and a feral monster to everyone else. When the cats brought her in we thought she was an adult, but she was a kitten. Turned out to be half bobcat. She looked like if Dana & Shiri had a baby 🥹
A majestic striped cat sitting under horizontal blinds that accent her tiger-like nature. There is a giant plus on the picture because it was a screenshot from a site that would not allow me to download my own damn photo for some reason
June 23, 2025 at 5:43 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Happy Monday
A screenshot of me messaging Adam on FB messenger. My message says: I woke up at 7 and then accidentally fell back asleep until 8 and had the weirdest most vivid dream I was living in some kind of dormitory, my parents drove me everywhere, but instead of being like college it was like… “the game industry.” Like everyone lived on the same campus And there was this new 10/10 RPG out, blew BG3 out of the water, everyone was obsessed with it, and the biggest character was this guy Enzo whose whole backstory had to do with his family and was apparently very tragic and beautiful and cool The message continues: And the voice actor for Enzo also lived on campus, but he kept starting fistfights in the cafeteria with people who said they were going to play the game because apparently Enzo’s family was based on his family? He just kept shouting “THAT’S MY FAMILY, it’s not FOR you to play with” and then beating the shit out of people. Also the voice actor’s name was Enzo too And I was very confused by all this and tried to get close enough to him to ask why he volunteered up his family’s story to this game if he didn’t want anyone to play it We had just discussed Deadbolt and he was getting excited about the concept of personal games when I woke up, which is annoying, because that was my segue
June 16, 2025 at 7:57 AM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Rescat is in East Boldon. UK ADOPTION OPPORTUNITY 🇬🇧🏡 Meet Patch, the Bahraini beauty queen with a cheeky streak and a heart of gold! Slightly cross-eyed and 100% one-of-a-kind, Patch was rescued from the streets of Bahrain and is now living her best life in East Boldon while she waits for a forever home anywhere in England 🇬🇧💫 This girl is pure personality; playful, dramatic, affectionate, and absolutely hilarious. She’ll flop over for belly rubs, chase her favorite toy like her life depends on it, and throw in some comic relief just when you need it most 🐾 Patch is also a world-class cuddler who adores cozy naps, windowsill daydreaming, and shadowing her humans around the house. She’s gentle with kids, good with chill pets, and would love access to a secure garden, balcony, or catio 🏡💕 Fully vaccinated, spayed, microchipped, dewormed, and tested negative for FIV/FeLV; she’s healthy, happy, and ready to join your family. Her adoption fee is £250, helping cover some of her travel and vet costs. If you’re looking for a cat who’s got character, love, and a little bit of chaos in the best way, Patch might just be your purr-fect match. DM us to adopt or learn more! 🐱🇬🇧 #adoptme #rescuedcat #bahrainicat #rescatcharity #adoptpatch #catsoftheuk #adoptdontshop #fosteringsaveslives
June 9, 2025 at 9:45 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
The rescue we got Shiri from is looking for a family in England to adopt this incredible specimen. Bsky, meet Patch the cross-eyed Bahraini street cat. Someone bring her home!!!
A calico cat looking dramatically and slightly cross-eyed at the camera A calico cat beeping her foster dad’s chin
June 9, 2025 at 9:41 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Original concept art for the cybertruck
Homer’s infamous car from the Simpsons
June 9, 2025 at 8:29 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Deeply unserious country
A screenshot of a headline from British tabloid The Mirror that says “Your rights if a hotel refuses to serve English food on a foreign holiday.” The description of the link says “A Brit was upset about having to eat Greek food on a Greek holiday”
June 9, 2025 at 7:09 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
He also misses the point of Dr. King’s non-violence strategy, which was to reveal the violence of the state to a horrified public while protesting in such a disruptive way that normal life could not continue. This is exactly the situation in LA minus one thing: American media’s distaste for empathy
Stokely Carmichael saying “In order for non-violence to work, your opponent must have a conscience. The United States has none, has none.”
June 8, 2025 at 9:45 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
I used to have an official Dragon Age inquisitor hoodie, but my ex stole it (and then my kid stole it and then it got stolen from my kid at school). Adam secretly tracked down one of the only ones anyone was selling and replaced it for me 😭😭😭
Me, smiling in glasses with no makeup, wearing my officially licensed Dragon Age hoodie. My cat Shiri is in the background on the back of the couch, facing away from camera
May 30, 2025 at 3:59 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
Real One(Tree Hill fan)s know
Me and Adam both standing in the loving embrace of indie musician Tyler Hilton, who played indie musician Chris Keller in the WB/CW classic, One Tree Hill
May 13, 2025 at 9:22 PM
twoscooters.bsky.social
"Please don't call me Liz"
A People headline that says "Queen Elizabeth's Final Diary Entry Contained Only Five Words"
May 9, 2025 at 8:04 PM