As an Ohioan bastard (born elsewhere, live elsewhere now) I can tell you we're a lot like the Kazon. Different sects, some of them get along, others don't, a quarter think they're from Kentucky, another quarter think they're from West Virginia, and the only thing we agree on is corn and GM cars.

I always knew LOCAL WEATHERMANS weren't to be trusted.

Also, I need to understand why more people think she looks like Dick Dasterdly when her name is an obvious ploy on Dudley Do-Right.

We're mixing Jay Ward and Hanna-Barbara cartoons together and I am pretty sure that blows a fucking hole open in the space-time continuum.