And PLEASE don't take away autistics' favorite things because you think they are for “younger” kids. Taking favorite things away removes a primary source of comfort and consistency, which is cruel.

Ending for now, full list of "please do nots" is at TPGA:

thinkingautismguide.com/2022/01/auti...

Pls don't try to “desensitize” autistics to overwhelming sensory stimuli like clothes tags, tight clothes, even individual acne blemishes, humming machines, flushing toilets, strong scents, or flickering lights. Research shows "desensitization" is traumatizing:

link.springer.com/article/10.1... 13/

Please don't ask autistics to "use their words"—as many autistic people think in images, not words, and so cannot possibly do what you are asking. Or they have processing issues. Or agnosia. Or apraxia. Or situational mutism. Or alexithymia. Or are overwhelmed. #autism #neurodiversity 12/

Please believe autistics who tell you they are not “hinting” with their body language and facial expressions, and that they mean what they say—without subtext. No, it's not reasonable for them to "try harder" and deploy body language and facial expressions like non-autistic people do. 11/

Please try to avoid getting mad at an autistic kid or adult or telling them they’re being rude if they ask for clarification of imprecise requests or instructions like, “I just need a few minutes,” or “clean up your room,” especially if you haven't given exact criteria or specific guidelines. 10/

Please try to avoid asking autistic kids or adults open-ended questions like “what do you want to do today?” instead of asking concrete yes or no questions, or giving them clear choices between specified options. *And again, this is relevant whether an autistic person speaks or has ID, or not* 9/

Please also know that it's not reasonable to demand that autistics quickly make choices between things or activities. It's important to understand that autistic people often need more processing time than non-autistic people—and as a result they may “freeze.” [holiday hike interlude, apologies.] 8/

Please don't interrupt autistics when they are focused, as switching tasks, transitions, & breaking focus can be really hard. Similarly, be aware of when they are stuck and can't just “snap out of it”—without considering specific ways to help:

medium.com/@sonnyhallet...

#neurodiversity #autism 7/

Many autistics have undiagnosed fine and/or gross motor processing issues, so please be thoughtful about physical difficulties with tying shoes or brushing teeth. Instead provide supports or adaptations like slip-on or velcro shoes, or electric toothbrushes (or help them brush their teeth). 6/

Please don't treat autistic meltdowns, and their triggers, as though they are tantrums and voluntary—when they are in reality involuntary, and in many cases can be avoided. 5/

These stress issues are things to consider for all autistic people, whether they can speak or not, and whether they have intellectual disability or not. That doesn’t mean every issue will be appropriate for every autistic person, or that we've covered all the bases. These are just a few examples. 4/

Please also know that even if an autistic person goes along with something, that doesn’t mean it's not a problem. Too many autistic people learn that they have no choice other than to submit to discomforts, & also people in their lives may not even register or believe that their distress is real. 3/

Please know that if the underlying, distressing, issue is never addressed, then the autistic person is not only still upset, but is being punished—or having rewards taken away, for being in distress. That is an unfair and horrible way to live. 2/

As a child I hated Xmas and presents did nothing to alleviate that. Our house was being visited all day by people I didn't know, my brothers and I had to stay in. Stuff of nightmares. I'll be hiding as usual again this year. Nothing has changed.

Appreciate the feedback. Sincerely.

So sorry. Which links? The ones I clicked are working for me.