The Chris Michael®️
@thechrismichael.bsky.social
Old-school junglist in a top-40 world
📍 NYCish
📍 NYCish
Why in god’s name does the NYPD need any outpost outside of NYC, let alone the country? (Zohran quote as refresher of priorities, not implication.)
February 8, 2026 at 4:05 PM
Why in god’s name does the NYPD need any outpost outside of NYC, let alone the country? (Zohran quote as refresher of priorities, not implication.)
TL;DR it’s dick pics
February 7, 2026 at 3:09 PM
TL;DR it’s dick pics
The irony of being served both of these back to back.
February 6, 2026 at 12:00 PM
The irony of being served both of these back to back.
New rule: You’re not a billionaire if you don’t have a billion dollars of taxable wealth. If Bezos or Musk are rich because of their stock value that can’t be taxed, then it shouldn’t count towards net worth. Otherwise you’re measuring length from the balls… and we all know that doesn’t count.
February 5, 2026 at 3:34 PM
New rule: You’re not a billionaire if you don’t have a billion dollars of taxable wealth. If Bezos or Musk are rich because of their stock value that can’t be taxed, then it shouldn’t count towards net worth. Otherwise you’re measuring length from the balls… and we all know that doesn’t count.
Babe, wake up. New way to say fapping just dropped.
February 5, 2026 at 4:15 AM
Babe, wake up. New way to say fapping just dropped.
Facebook notification: “10 of your friends are using Meta ai!”
Me: “Welp… 10 of my friends are trash, apparently.”
Me: “Welp… 10 of my friends are trash, apparently.”
February 2, 2026 at 12:17 AM
Facebook notification: “10 of your friends are using Meta ai!”
Me: “Welp… 10 of my friends are trash, apparently.”
Me: “Welp… 10 of my friends are trash, apparently.”
Just downloaded. 📲 Classic social feed, no shady algorithms. Founder is Australian, where data privacy is stricter; and servers are in Ireland, whose laws & politics have consistently been on the right side of history.
January 27, 2026 at 11:08 AM
Just downloaded. 📲 Classic social feed, no shady algorithms. Founder is Australian, where data privacy is stricter; and servers are in Ireland, whose laws & politics have consistently been on the right side of history.
Property values in the central west african lowlands about to go up…
January 19, 2026 at 4:38 PM
Property values in the central west african lowlands about to go up…
Can we all agree this should give Trump a pass on at least ONE small child from Epstein Island?
January 8, 2026 at 6:00 PM
Can we all agree this should give Trump a pass on at least ONE small child from Epstein Island?
Union Square is just Times Square for Brooklyn kids
November 18, 2025 at 1:58 PM
Union Square is just Times Square for Brooklyn kids
POV: you are “Bubba”
November 14, 2025 at 5:14 PM
POV: you are “Bubba”
You vs. the guy she told you not to worry about.
November 6, 2025 at 2:40 PM
You vs. the guy she told you not to worry about.
Rate my setup
November 5, 2025 at 3:33 PM
Rate my setup
IDF be like
October 29, 2025 at 3:27 PM
IDF be like
Driving a giant 4-door pickup truck with a shorter bed is like walking around with a conspicuous bulge that’s mostly ball.
October 21, 2025 at 9:06 PM
Driving a giant 4-door pickup truck with a shorter bed is like walking around with a conspicuous bulge that’s mostly ball.
Youngest child: “why is this genocide different from all other genocides?”
Mass slaughter in Gaza stands apart from other genocides, Chris Sidoti says: ‘People cannot escape’
Australian human rights expert who was on UN commission of inquiry labels Israel’s strategy a failure that ‘has not brought peace and has not destroyed Hamas’
www.theguardian.com
October 6, 2025 at 2:17 PM
Youngest child: “why is this genocide different from all other genocides?”
“BY THE POWER OF GRAYSKULL”
October 5, 2025 at 10:12 PM
“BY THE POWER OF GRAYSKULL”
Hearing the President refer to PDX as “war-ravaged” (to primarily red-state supporters who will neither visit nor confirm) makes me realize this is what the United States has been saying about China, Iran, the Middle East, etc my whole life.
October 4, 2025 at 8:38 PM
Hearing the President refer to PDX as “war-ravaged” (to primarily red-state supporters who will neither visit nor confirm) makes me realize this is what the United States has been saying about China, Iran, the Middle East, etc my whole life.
“Mom! Can we get Fukushima?”
“No, we have Fukushima at home”
The Fukushima at home:
“No, we have Fukushima at home”
The Fukushima at home:
October 4, 2025 at 8:33 PM
“Mom! Can we get Fukushima?”
“No, we have Fukushima at home”
The Fukushima at home:
“No, we have Fukushima at home”
The Fukushima at home:
I should call her
September 27, 2025 at 12:43 PM
I should call her
Reposted by The Chris Michael®️
TikTok’s US operations are changing hands and will be retraining the algo on US-only data. No word yet on whether a new app is needed.
Meanwhile, @skylight.social — the TikTok of the atmosphere — is seeing massive growth this week.
🔗 skylight.social
Meanwhile, @skylight.social — the TikTok of the atmosphere — is seeing massive growth this week.
🔗 skylight.social
skylight.social
September 24, 2025 at 8:01 PM
TikTok’s US operations are changing hands and will be retraining the algo on US-only data. No word yet on whether a new app is needed.
Meanwhile, @skylight.social — the TikTok of the atmosphere — is seeing massive growth this week.
🔗 skylight.social
Meanwhile, @skylight.social — the TikTok of the atmosphere — is seeing massive growth this week.
🔗 skylight.social
It’s this or nothing.
September 23, 2025 at 5:31 PM
It’s this or nothing.
Annihilation (2018)
September 21, 2025 at 12:24 PM
Annihilation (2018)
Everything old is new again.
September 20, 2025 at 2:21 PM
Everything old is new again.