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tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
TANA Bros Reporting
@tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
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Vigilante Sports Journalists: Getting the scoops, staying independent, doing it for free for the fans. Are you a Premium Member yet?
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tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
Oh. Our bad. He is Taylor Calheira and he finished second in the USL Championship Golden Boot race. Plays for FC Tulsa.
A screenshot of FC Tulsa’s Taylor Calheira stats for 2025.
November 17, 2025 at 10:07 PM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
Vibes. #rctid
Phil Neville
October 27, 2025 at 2:15 AM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
Don’t think Ian Smith was eligible for free agency, per MLSPA info.

mlsplayers.org/news/2026-fr...
October 3, 2025 at 9:02 PM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
LAFC with 3 hat tricks in their last 3 matches.

#RCTID with 0 hat tricks in MLS league play and, um, it’s been a while since the last one in the USL days.
September 22, 2025 at 2:33 PM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
Son Heung-min nets his first MLS hat trick tonight.

It’s been a minute since the Timbers have grabbed one in league play. #rctid
Number of days since David Hague recorded the last hat trick in league play for the Portland Timbers.
September 18, 2025 at 5:35 AM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
Around MLS last night a record *4* hat tricks were scored. Meanwhile in Portland…. #rctid
Count of days between today and the last time the Portland Timbers recorded a hat trick in league play.
September 14, 2025 at 4:29 PM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
Never forget the time when the Flounder Media Ecosystem thought Leagues Cup was nothing but a cash grab. Until they reached the final. Then it became a Very Serious Trophy.
“Fans are not stupid. I'm sure these games will sell some tickets, which always happens when Mexican teams come to the United States, but only the most naive will see this as anything like a genuine competition, no matter how loudly participants scream "We are taking this extremely seriously" as RSL head coach Mike Petke did. My suspicion is that most fans, especially those without a team participating, will simply ignore it while also crossing their fingers that their team isn't forced to play in it the subsequent years. Even if MLS teams perform well, no one will accept it as proof that the quality gap has been significantly closed.” Sounder at Heart, May 31, 2019 “No one likes @leaguescup, we don't care.” Sounder at Heart, September 16, 2019
September 1, 2025 at 4:18 PM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
The underlying numbers today are insane. This was a playoff caliber match. To note, this is only with 1 Senior DP on the pitch. Definitely excited to see Velde and Carballo. #RCTID
August 17, 2025 at 5:00 AM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
The MLS Media Ecosystem after last night’s result(s).
A soccer pundit with an unfortunate moment popping open a champagne bottle.
August 1, 2025 at 12:22 PM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
This is art. #rctid
July 31, 2025 at 4:16 PM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
The MLS Media Ecosystem when they see who is on top of the Leagues Cup MLS table and how they got there.
A professional soccer pundit.
July 31, 2025 at 5:52 AM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
Per the link. Not sure how legit the source is, tho.
Latest News Juan Mosquera Transfer from Portland Timbers to Anderlecht Anderlecht has expressed interest in Juan David Mosquera, according to Argentinian journalist Mariano Olsen. Mosquera, a 22-year-old Colombian international, is currently under contract with Portland Timbers in MLS until the end of 2027. His market value is noted to be around 3 million euros. Alongside Anderlecht, Spartak Moscow is also reportedly interested in acquiring the skilled right-back. Since joining Portland Timbers in the summer of 2022, Mosquera has made 93 appearances, scoring four goals and providing ten assists. Anderlecht's pursuit of Mosquera is fueled by their need to bolster their defense, particularly on the right flank, due to existing challenges with player availability and the potential departure of current squad members.
July 18, 2025 at 8:37 PM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
Mood. #rctid
Injured Portland Timbers players Zac McGraw, David da Costa, and Antony’s reaction to seeing RSL take the lead this evening.
July 17, 2025 at 4:42 AM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
Days since last Timbers hat trick in league play. #rctid
The number of days since the last Portland Timbers hat trick in league play. 6556 days.
June 26, 2025 at 4:18 PM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
Lolz. It’s giving erudite “Welcome to your nightmare” vibes. #rctid
A very learned sounding self-own.
May 7, 2025 at 4:59 AM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
Tonight’s lineup. #rctid
May 7, 2025 at 1:17 AM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
The Underlying Numbers!
A screenshot of the stats of the May 4, 2025 match between Sporting Kansas City and Los Angeles Galaxy. SKC won 1-0 on a Galaxy own goal and without recording a single shot. Historic.
May 5, 2025 at 1:19 AM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
May 1, 2025 at 1:40 AM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
Well, well, well. #rctid
Latest Power Ranking for PTFC. Latest Power Ranking for Shittle.
April 9, 2025 at 3:23 AM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
From Power Rankings to Preferential Rankings to Petty Rankings. Seems purely performative and perfunctory.
Screenshot of some of Matt Doyle’s MLS Matchday 7 Power Rankings.
April 7, 2025 at 11:19 PM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
The introduction is something else.
Matt Doyle’s introductory sentence for his MLS Matchday 7 Power Rankings.
April 7, 2025 at 10:01 PM
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“6468 days July 15, 2007 - March 30, 2025” The number of days that have passed since the Portland Timbers last hat trick in league play.
March 31, 2025 at 5:15 AM
tanabrosreporting.bsky.social
This Des Moines Menace squad would run roughshod over the 2025 Portland Timbers.
A screenshot of the Des Moines Menace Starting XI for their Lamar Hunt US Open Cup First Round matchup vs Sporting Kansas City II on 3/19/25.
March 20, 2025 at 1:49 AM
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#rctid
#saiew
#knowyourhistory
March 10, 2025 at 6:08 PM
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Live look at the MLS Media Ecosystem after that matchup.
March 9, 2025 at 12:06 AM