Stuart Stevens 🇵🇸 🇺🇦 🇪🇺
@stuartstevens.co.uk
Public access qualified barrister.
All views are my own.
All views are my own.
When dads are left to look after the children… don’t threaten us with a good time.
November 30, 2025 at 8:19 PM
When dads are left to look after the children… don’t threaten us with a good time.
I feel safer already.
At least the 87 year old didn’t hurt the poor police officers arresting him for peacefully holding up a sign.
Imagine a police force bragging about this on Facebook. It should be parody.
At least the 87 year old didn’t hurt the poor police officers arresting him for peacefully holding up a sign.
Imagine a police force bragging about this on Facebook. It should be parody.
November 18, 2025 at 7:44 PM
I feel safer already.
At least the 87 year old didn’t hurt the poor police officers arresting him for peacefully holding up a sign.
Imagine a police force bragging about this on Facebook. It should be parody.
At least the 87 year old didn’t hurt the poor police officers arresting him for peacefully holding up a sign.
Imagine a police force bragging about this on Facebook. It should be parody.
Starmer wants to allow these animals into Birmingham after they rioted in Amsterdam last year. Their matches in Israel are being called off in the last few weeks because of their ‘serious violence’.
How will the British citizens be compensated when this lot inevitably commit violence in Birmingham?
How will the British citizens be compensated when this lot inevitably commit violence in Birmingham?
October 20, 2025 at 8:59 PM
Starmer wants to allow these animals into Birmingham after they rioted in Amsterdam last year. Their matches in Israel are being called off in the last few weeks because of their ‘serious violence’.
How will the British citizens be compensated when this lot inevitably commit violence in Birmingham?
How will the British citizens be compensated when this lot inevitably commit violence in Birmingham?
After over 2 years of searching, I found my favourite mushrooms at Thetford Forest! 🍄🍄🍄
This is bucket list stuff worthy of a mention. You’re all welcome.
This is bucket list stuff worthy of a mention. You’re all welcome.
October 4, 2025 at 10:53 AM
After over 2 years of searching, I found my favourite mushrooms at Thetford Forest! 🍄🍄🍄
This is bucket list stuff worthy of a mention. You’re all welcome.
This is bucket list stuff worthy of a mention. You’re all welcome.
Why aren’t the Courts in the US conducting remote hearings for refugees and asylum seekers?
If my clients were being targeted by rogue agencies with no accountability I’d be applying for judges to list cases remotely so the client could attend safely. Scary stuff.
If my clients were being targeted by rogue agencies with no accountability I’d be applying for judges to list cases remotely so the client could attend safely. Scary stuff.
September 28, 2025 at 12:35 PM
Why aren’t the Courts in the US conducting remote hearings for refugees and asylum seekers?
If my clients were being targeted by rogue agencies with no accountability I’d be applying for judges to list cases remotely so the client could attend safely. Scary stuff.
If my clients were being targeted by rogue agencies with no accountability I’d be applying for judges to list cases remotely so the client could attend safely. Scary stuff.
You know when someone says ‘don’t push the mysterious big red button…’
I’m 100% going to take it now. For curiosity if nothing else. I’m not pregnant anyway.
I’m 100% going to take it now. For curiosity if nothing else. I’m not pregnant anyway.
September 24, 2025 at 8:47 AM
You know when someone says ‘don’t push the mysterious big red button…’
I’m 100% going to take it now. For curiosity if nothing else. I’m not pregnant anyway.
I’m 100% going to take it now. For curiosity if nothing else. I’m not pregnant anyway.
I keep pegging my wife in public and she’s fallen out with me.
Apparently it’s weird to take colourful clothes pegs out and covertly clip them to her when she’s distracted and wait for her to find them.
Hashtag normalise pegging.
Apparently it’s weird to take colourful clothes pegs out and covertly clip them to her when she’s distracted and wait for her to find them.
Hashtag normalise pegging.
September 13, 2025 at 7:44 PM
I keep pegging my wife in public and she’s fallen out with me.
Apparently it’s weird to take colourful clothes pegs out and covertly clip them to her when she’s distracted and wait for her to find them.
Hashtag normalise pegging.
Apparently it’s weird to take colourful clothes pegs out and covertly clip them to her when she’s distracted and wait for her to find them.
Hashtag normalise pegging.
Now I see. It’s not the guns causing gun death. It’s all the hormonal trans people. It’s the 0.8% demographic to blame. How did I miss this?
This is cartoonishly shitty to be saying on tv. Especially when the shooter is unknown! I couldn’t write parody as good as this. What a c.u.n.t. Genuinely.
This is cartoonishly shitty to be saying on tv. Especially when the shooter is unknown! I couldn’t write parody as good as this. What a c.u.n.t. Genuinely.
September 12, 2025 at 7:40 AM
Now I see. It’s not the guns causing gun death. It’s all the hormonal trans people. It’s the 0.8% demographic to blame. How did I miss this?
This is cartoonishly shitty to be saying on tv. Especially when the shooter is unknown! I couldn’t write parody as good as this. What a c.u.n.t. Genuinely.
This is cartoonishly shitty to be saying on tv. Especially when the shooter is unknown! I couldn’t write parody as good as this. What a c.u.n.t. Genuinely.
The Kirk news is obviously tragic.
But if I had lost a loved one to gun violence and heard someone repeatedly say that gun deaths were an acceptable price to pay to ensure others could own guns, I’d certainly struggle with it.
I can see why someone might lash out against him.
But if I had lost a loved one to gun violence and heard someone repeatedly say that gun deaths were an acceptable price to pay to ensure others could own guns, I’d certainly struggle with it.
I can see why someone might lash out against him.
September 11, 2025 at 4:57 PM
The Kirk news is obviously tragic.
But if I had lost a loved one to gun violence and heard someone repeatedly say that gun deaths were an acceptable price to pay to ensure others could own guns, I’d certainly struggle with it.
I can see why someone might lash out against him.
But if I had lost a loved one to gun violence and heard someone repeatedly say that gun deaths were an acceptable price to pay to ensure others could own guns, I’d certainly struggle with it.
I can see why someone might lash out against him.
There must be better fake tans out there. My wife looks incredible when she uses a fake tan. I just think she’s caught the sun. Why does he look Umpa Lumpa radioactive orange? It’s so weird.
August 26, 2025 at 2:43 PM
There must be better fake tans out there. My wife looks incredible when she uses a fake tan. I just think she’s caught the sun. Why does he look Umpa Lumpa radioactive orange? It’s so weird.
Started lifting at the gym 4 months ago. Hit a 150kg deadlift today. Also, my son ate a whole melon.
Today was good.
Today was good.
July 22, 2025 at 9:44 PM
Started lifting at the gym 4 months ago. Hit a 150kg deadlift today. Also, my son ate a whole melon.
Today was good.
Today was good.
Got nominated for Northamptonshire’s ‘Best Solicitor’ yesterday.
I was a little perplexed when the ushers handed me the envelope at court instead of it being sent to me directly.
Was more perplexed when I remembered I’m not and have never been a solicitor.
Well, you’ve either got it or you don’t.
I was a little perplexed when the ushers handed me the envelope at court instead of it being sent to me directly.
Was more perplexed when I remembered I’m not and have never been a solicitor.
Well, you’ve either got it or you don’t.
July 9, 2025 at 8:07 PM
Got nominated for Northamptonshire’s ‘Best Solicitor’ yesterday.
I was a little perplexed when the ushers handed me the envelope at court instead of it being sent to me directly.
Was more perplexed when I remembered I’m not and have never been a solicitor.
Well, you’ve either got it or you don’t.
I was a little perplexed when the ushers handed me the envelope at court instead of it being sent to me directly.
Was more perplexed when I remembered I’m not and have never been a solicitor.
Well, you’ve either got it or you don’t.
Edith needs to calm down.
July 4, 2025 at 5:13 PM
Edith needs to calm down.
I asked Chat GPT to predict my upcoming year through WW3 with a picture. It gave me this.
It seems that AI knows how to motivate me for the end of days. Bring on the apocalypse!
It seems that AI knows how to motivate me for the end of days. Bring on the apocalypse!
June 22, 2025 at 7:50 PM
I asked Chat GPT to predict my upcoming year through WW3 with a picture. It gave me this.
It seems that AI knows how to motivate me for the end of days. Bring on the apocalypse!
It seems that AI knows how to motivate me for the end of days. Bring on the apocalypse!
It’s typical. We’ve just finished building our extension on the house and WW3 starts breaking out. I’ve now spent all my bunker building money on an above ground extension.
At least I’ll see the bombs coming though the skylight. 💣 🤯
At least I’ll see the bombs coming though the skylight. 💣 🤯
June 22, 2025 at 7:42 PM
It’s typical. We’ve just finished building our extension on the house and WW3 starts breaking out. I’ve now spent all my bunker building money on an above ground extension.
At least I’ll see the bombs coming though the skylight. 💣 🤯
At least I’ll see the bombs coming though the skylight. 💣 🤯
No one is above the law 😂
June 1, 2025 at 4:28 PM
No one is above the law 😂
T rump
A lways
C hickens
O ut
🐣
🌮
🐥
🌮
🐤
A lways
C hickens
O ut
🐣
🌮
🐥
🌮
🐤
May 31, 2025 at 11:04 PM
T rump
A lways
C hickens
O ut
🐣
🌮
🐥
🌮
🐤
A lways
C hickens
O ut
🐣
🌮
🐥
🌮
🐤
Why can’t he get clothes that fit though?
May 31, 2025 at 11:00 PM
Why can’t he get clothes that fit though?
140kg pb today. 150kg incoming next week. It will be done.
May 31, 2025 at 4:14 PM
140kg pb today. 150kg incoming next week. It will be done.
When your mate plays pro hockey and you get to play with his recovery toys… 🏑☠️🏑☠️🏑
May 31, 2025 at 3:00 PM
When your mate plays pro hockey and you get to play with his recovery toys… 🏑☠️🏑☠️🏑
My wife went to normal school. I went to an obscenely posh school.
I was trying to explain what a Fives court looks like without showing her a picture.
On reflection, what sort of posho smack head designed a Fives court? It’s mental. What’s with the step? Trip hazard. What’s with the weird wall?
I was trying to explain what a Fives court looks like without showing her a picture.
On reflection, what sort of posho smack head designed a Fives court? It’s mental. What’s with the step? Trip hazard. What’s with the weird wall?
May 18, 2025 at 7:23 PM
My wife went to normal school. I went to an obscenely posh school.
I was trying to explain what a Fives court looks like without showing her a picture.
On reflection, what sort of posho smack head designed a Fives court? It’s mental. What’s with the step? Trip hazard. What’s with the weird wall?
I was trying to explain what a Fives court looks like without showing her a picture.
On reflection, what sort of posho smack head designed a Fives court? It’s mental. What’s with the step? Trip hazard. What’s with the weird wall?
Define perseverance.
May 17, 2025 at 7:56 PM
Define perseverance.
How do you draw ‘theft’?
May 15, 2025 at 11:00 PM
How do you draw ‘theft’?
I’m doing some home renovations & wanted to buy something to help me move the heavier furniture around.
Being a thrifty chap, I thought I’d save about £7.00 by using Temu.
Who knew it would be shipped by land. The shipping updates are a revelation.
I may send it back to watch the return journey.
Being a thrifty chap, I thought I’d save about £7.00 by using Temu.
Who knew it would be shipped by land. The shipping updates are a revelation.
I may send it back to watch the return journey.
May 9, 2025 at 9:57 AM
I’m doing some home renovations & wanted to buy something to help me move the heavier furniture around.
Being a thrifty chap, I thought I’d save about £7.00 by using Temu.
Who knew it would be shipped by land. The shipping updates are a revelation.
I may send it back to watch the return journey.
Being a thrifty chap, I thought I’d save about £7.00 by using Temu.
Who knew it would be shipped by land. The shipping updates are a revelation.
I may send it back to watch the return journey.