Lazers Mark-Raygun
@space-laser-party.bsky.social
Comp sci guy, amateur musician, laziest man on Mars.
I'm imagining horny teens sneaking in to Melania to bang in the dark and seclusion of an empty theater-- only to find it's impossible to maintain an erection with Trump's all over the screen.
January 31, 2026 at 1:48 AM
I'm imagining horny teens sneaking in to Melania to bang in the dark and seclusion of an empty theater-- only to find it's impossible to maintain an erection with Trump's all over the screen.
Me: My tummy hurts. 😢
Her: We don't have to go to Pambazos for dinner...
Me: Woah woah woah... I didn't say all that.
(for reference: this is a pambazo from Pambazos)
Her: We don't have to go to Pambazos for dinner...
Me: Woah woah woah... I didn't say all that.
(for reference: this is a pambazo from Pambazos)
January 30, 2026 at 7:24 PM
Me: My tummy hurts. 😢
Her: We don't have to go to Pambazos for dinner...
Me: Woah woah woah... I didn't say all that.
(for reference: this is a pambazo from Pambazos)
Her: We don't have to go to Pambazos for dinner...
Me: Woah woah woah... I didn't say all that.
(for reference: this is a pambazo from Pambazos)
So many songs about love, and only one about calling a green fella in need of mental health support a "nasty, wasty skunk."
January 30, 2026 at 5:00 PM
So many songs about love, and only one about calling a green fella in need of mental health support a "nasty, wasty skunk."
I just kick ass and check emails...
...and I'm never out of emails.
...and I'm never out of emails.
January 28, 2026 at 9:32 PM
I just kick ass and check emails...
...and I'm never out of emails.
...and I'm never out of emails.
Coffee is a great example of how tariffs suck. Your crummy 12oz bag of Dunkin coffee is now pushing $14 at the grocery store. It was less than $8 two years ago. And guess what we can't grow in the USA and need to import...
January 28, 2026 at 6:31 PM
Coffee is a great example of how tariffs suck. Your crummy 12oz bag of Dunkin coffee is now pushing $14 at the grocery store. It was less than $8 two years ago. And guess what we can't grow in the USA and need to import...
Reposted by Lazers Mark-Raygun
No Bovino? Time to drink mo vino!
January 27, 2026 at 1:47 AM
No Bovino? Time to drink mo vino!
Waiting very patiently on Gen Z to sell us cat litter called "Li'l Pissers" or some shit to break us through the overly-polite, minimalist hellscape we're currently inhabiting.
January 27, 2026 at 6:08 PM
Waiting very patiently on Gen Z to sell us cat litter called "Li'l Pissers" or some shit to break us through the overly-polite, minimalist hellscape we're currently inhabiting.
Google Maps: "You're popular!"
Me: Pfffffff, yeah. On fuggin' Google Maps...
Me: Pfffffff, yeah. On fuggin' Google Maps...
January 24, 2026 at 4:19 PM
Google Maps: "You're popular!"
Me: Pfffffff, yeah. On fuggin' Google Maps...
Me: Pfffffff, yeah. On fuggin' Google Maps...
Alright. How many inches are you going to give me, Snow Daddy?
January 24, 2026 at 2:32 PM
Alright. How many inches are you going to give me, Snow Daddy?
I don't know who needs to hear this, but scrolling past the AI overview and clicking the first few Stack Overflow links like it's the old days is really important to do right now.
January 21, 2026 at 4:01 PM
I don't know who needs to hear this, but scrolling past the AI overview and clicking the first few Stack Overflow links like it's the old days is really important to do right now.
My doctor: you should drink 8 glasses of water a day
RFK Jr busts in: you need eight steaks of whole milk
Doc: Wh--
RFK: We need to bring back lead in gasoline
Me: No...
RFK: Smoking is healthy!
RFK Jr busts in: you need eight steaks of whole milk
Doc: Wh--
RFK: We need to bring back lead in gasoline
Me: No...
RFK: Smoking is healthy!
January 18, 2026 at 1:30 PM
My doctor: you should drink 8 glasses of water a day
RFK Jr busts in: you need eight steaks of whole milk
Doc: Wh--
RFK: We need to bring back lead in gasoline
Me: No...
RFK: Smoking is healthy!
RFK Jr busts in: you need eight steaks of whole milk
Doc: Wh--
RFK: We need to bring back lead in gasoline
Me: No...
RFK: Smoking is healthy!
Nothin' quite like a kinda hefty *thing* in a really nice *bag*.
January 17, 2026 at 7:13 PM
Nothin' quite like a kinda hefty *thing* in a really nice *bag*.
Gonna tell my kids these are the trigonometric functions...
January 17, 2026 at 5:36 PM
Gonna tell my kids these are the trigonometric functions...
Reposted by Lazers Mark-Raygun
pretty sure he meant the other thing, grok, but very cool that those are your two things
January 16, 2026 at 4:55 PM
pretty sure he meant the other thing, grok, but very cool that those are your two things
Anybody else get a little anxious about choosing the optional container for leftovers? Or did my mom do too much Tylenol 40 years ago?
January 16, 2026 at 12:05 AM
Anybody else get a little anxious about choosing the optional container for leftovers? Or did my mom do too much Tylenol 40 years ago?
Reposted by Lazers Mark-Raygun
🔥 @markruffalo.bsky.social : “I gotta be honest, I’m not feeling so great. Renee Good was murdered... stormtroopers running around terrorizing. As much as I love all this, I can’t pretend all this crazy stuff isn’t happening. We have a president who says laws don’t apply to him- this is crazy.”
January 12, 2026 at 2:00 PM
🔥 @markruffalo.bsky.social : “I gotta be honest, I’m not feeling so great. Renee Good was murdered... stormtroopers running around terrorizing. As much as I love all this, I can’t pretend all this crazy stuff isn’t happening. We have a president who says laws don’t apply to him- this is crazy.”
Taking off from work: 🥰
Filling out my time card after having taken off: 🙄
Filling out my time card after having taken off: 🙄
January 10, 2026 at 7:30 PM
Taking off from work: 🥰
Filling out my time card after having taken off: 🙄
Filling out my time card after having taken off: 🙄
If you're ever in need of a pick-me-up, Wikipedia has a page devoted to omelettes containing 26 photos, including this absolute specimen from Iran.
January 10, 2026 at 3:16 PM
If you're ever in need of a pick-me-up, Wikipedia has a page devoted to omelettes containing 26 photos, including this absolute specimen from Iran.
Gotta love janitors swooping in and Janet-ing things.
January 10, 2026 at 1:53 PM
Gotta love janitors swooping in and Janet-ing things.
Living in 2026 is scrolling past the AI overview and clicking on links to make sure folks like Stack Overflow actually get hits.
January 10, 2026 at 4:22 AM
Living in 2026 is scrolling past the AI overview and clicking on links to make sure folks like Stack Overflow actually get hits.
My millennial trait is smashing my credit card against a reader for far too long, despite understanding how the underlying NFC technology works.
January 9, 2026 at 9:08 PM
My millennial trait is smashing my credit card against a reader for far too long, despite understanding how the underlying NFC technology works.
"How we doin' today, folks?!" I ask on a company call knowing the cavalcade of bullshit is still happening.
January 8, 2026 at 6:14 PM
"How we doin' today, folks?!" I ask on a company call knowing the cavalcade of bullshit is still happening.
Some reference for when some right-wing nutjob cries about "socialism".
January 7, 2026 at 2:43 PM
Some reference for when some right-wing nutjob cries about "socialism".
Reposted by Lazers Mark-Raygun
What in the Gestapo is going on in Grand Rapids?
Watch this activist get arrested *mid-interview* for speaking out against U.S. action in Venezuela.
Watch this activist get arrested *mid-interview* for speaking out against U.S. action in Venezuela.
January 5, 2026 at 4:12 PM
What in the Gestapo is going on in Grand Rapids?
Watch this activist get arrested *mid-interview* for speaking out against U.S. action in Venezuela.
Watch this activist get arrested *mid-interview* for speaking out against U.S. action in Venezuela.
from your ears to God's lips... ummm.. from God's lips to your ears... to infinity and beyond? Idk, I gotcha, bro.
January 6, 2026 at 4:50 PM
from your ears to God's lips... ummm.. from God's lips to your ears... to infinity and beyond? Idk, I gotcha, bro.