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slosifl.bsky.social
slosifl
@slosifl.bsky.social
Babysitter. Risk taker. Approachable.
(watching kids run around the pool consequence free)

World War 6 Veteran: your welcome
January 27, 2026 at 4:34 AM
(seeking a second opinion)

is this the amnesia clinic
January 27, 2026 at 3:07 AM
at the world famous cat’s deli in nyc, after waiting in line for 45 minutes i notice that everyone else thinks i work here
January 27, 2026 at 2:55 AM
Back in my day the only genders were milkmaid, milkman, and the lactologistical hemiporous milkpersons that form tubes connecting them.
January 24, 2026 at 11:46 PM
ghost of christmas past: so belated merry christmas of course…
January 20, 2026 at 3:47 AM
X-Files Series Finale:

FBI Agent Fox Mulder: ah okay nevermind

FBI Agent Dana Scully: oh well
January 20, 2026 at 2:13 AM
therapist: holy shit, go on
January 19, 2026 at 3:52 AM
Showing my great grandson a VHS of his great grandmother flashing Anthony Keidis on MTV Spring Break: they blurred them out back then

Great Grandson: spring break not bounce? why spring break? (starts crying on roblox)
January 19, 2026 at 3:42 AM
Saint Peter: okay sounds like you’ll want the extended family pack, friend silver and childhood dog box

Me (dead): i’ll just do dogbox for now
January 19, 2026 at 2:57 AM
My son and his latina wife bought me a computer hat so I can travel in “vr”. They’re very beautiful to me, mexicans.

[ LIVE: PRESIDENT TRUMP LAUNCHES NUCLEAR STRIKE ON DOG PARK ]
January 19, 2026 at 2:43 AM
pretty suspicious that the dentist found a cavity on the one day in five years I was there
January 15, 2026 at 3:23 AM
magic AIghtball: yes, one hundred percent yes! stephanie p going to prom with you shows she respects your dark side. deep down you deserve it.
January 13, 2026 at 4:38 AM
just got another CD-ROM in the mail offering me 600 hours of AI for free
January 12, 2026 at 2:55 AM
my dog is missing, have you seen him?

stranger: what kind of a dog?

me: no it’s absolutely a dog
January 12, 2026 at 1:35 AM
Once you finally take responsibility for all your mistakes, you are suddenly able to focus on finding the guy or guys who framed you.
January 10, 2026 at 4:30 AM
What’s that Lassie? There’s a guy trapped in a well?

(rope ladder lands in a loose coil)
January 4, 2026 at 2:32 AM
They’re finally finishing the triquil- close encounters of the first time
January 4, 2026 at 2:28 AM
(Embossing another tear drop on the statue of liberty)

why pluribus unum indeed
January 4, 2026 at 2:04 AM
Upgrading my skeleton closet so I can regret more this year!
January 2, 2026 at 3:30 AM
This year, for real this time, I will fundamentally literally become a different person. A better and extremely unfamiliar guy.
January 2, 2026 at 2:27 AM
History Professor (gravely): and then guess what happened after that
December 31, 2025 at 5:09 AM
after 41 years of marriage my wife finally picked which live divided sky solo she won’t let me play on loop in the car. luckily my backup is secretly way better.
December 31, 2025 at 4:52 AM
amnesiac tries hospital food for the first time
December 30, 2025 at 4:57 AM
here we are

once again

recollecting the auld

only 2 forget them

not even a mouse
December 29, 2025 at 4:00 AM
magic lamp ai out of nowhere while watching tv:

consider it done master, you have 1 wishes left
December 22, 2025 at 3:45 AM