I’m jumping at every sound his family makes

I’m not?? I don’t feel like I’m having an episode genuinely so I was surprised he brought it up. I just don’t feel any better after that conversation even tho I was able to tell him how I was feeling and he cried on his knees to say sorry. I just feel like I’m dissociative

Before the conversation ended he brought up the fact that we only fight like this when my bipolar is acting up and now I’m wondering if this was all just some fit on my end? It feels like he’s calling me crazy again/flipping the blame even after all we talked about. Am I crazy?

I said I forgive him and a part of me meant it. I said that I know he cares but I think he approached it all very badly. He keeps asking if we are okay and saying that he loves me more than anything. I’m just…disenchanted by what I saw this week.

Always has the option to say it’s not good for him. He freaked out at that and said he would take any days with me even if each day I was actively shortening my own lifespan. He said he doesn’t want to be bad for me, that he just wants to be good. He just wants us to be okay.

He seemed to hate that idea but gave in anyway. He says it feels like he’s holding the knife to my w4ist by allowing me to do that. He said he doesn’t feel like he’s allowed to be upset about a lot of things. I told him that if he can’t handle me with an eating disorder which I’ll have for life he

Please say it wasn’t ground beef bestie!!!!

I think it was because he snapped at me earlier about the cat and when he apologized I said thank you instead of I forgive you?? And I don’t have anyone else 🥲

Sending you love hun, I’m so sorry 🫂🫂

He cried he wasn’t a monster again and I reassured him. I just knew this was going to upset him so badly I hate everything