Sir Michael Take CBE
@sirmichaeltake.bsky.social
The former Conservative MP for Dorset East.🇬🇧
Bunty & I are going on our annual cruise. We’re off to The Chagos Islands!
Ship’s Entertainment Director Phillip Schofield is spoiling us:
Free Wine & Skunk tasting.
Music from Carol F*cker & T’Cau.
And Mike Graham’s talks on how to grow concrete.
See you back here in a week!☀️
Ship’s Entertainment Director Phillip Schofield is spoiling us:
Free Wine & Skunk tasting.
Music from Carol F*cker & T’Cau.
And Mike Graham’s talks on how to grow concrete.
See you back here in a week!☀️
November 14, 2025 at 9:34 AM
Bunty & I are going on our annual cruise. We’re off to The Chagos Islands!
Ship’s Entertainment Director Phillip Schofield is spoiling us:
Free Wine & Skunk tasting.
Music from Carol F*cker & T’Cau.
And Mike Graham’s talks on how to grow concrete.
See you back here in a week!☀️
Ship’s Entertainment Director Phillip Schofield is spoiling us:
Free Wine & Skunk tasting.
Music from Carol F*cker & T’Cau.
And Mike Graham’s talks on how to grow concrete.
See you back here in a week!☀️
Children’s TV nowadays?
‘Sooty, Sweep & Robby’ is my 4 year old granddaughter’s favourite programme.
She loves Sooty’s magic tricks, Sweep’s stupid jokes and Robby’s really silly speeches.
😊
‘Sooty, Sweep & Robby’ is my 4 year old granddaughter’s favourite programme.
She loves Sooty’s magic tricks, Sweep’s stupid jokes and Robby’s really silly speeches.
😊
November 13, 2025 at 8:06 AM
Children’s TV nowadays?
‘Sooty, Sweep & Robby’ is my 4 year old granddaughter’s favourite programme.
She loves Sooty’s magic tricks, Sweep’s stupid jokes and Robby’s really silly speeches.
😊
‘Sooty, Sweep & Robby’ is my 4 year old granddaughter’s favourite programme.
She loves Sooty’s magic tricks, Sweep’s stupid jokes and Robby’s really silly speeches.
😊
Just in from SmallTalk TV.
Proving that poor old Mike, using his own legendary words, is:
‘Plank of the Week!’
🥳✔️
Proving that poor old Mike, using his own legendary words, is:
‘Plank of the Week!’
🥳✔️
November 12, 2025 at 5:36 PM
Just in from SmallTalk TV.
Proving that poor old Mike, using his own legendary words, is:
‘Plank of the Week!’
🥳✔️
Proving that poor old Mike, using his own legendary words, is:
‘Plank of the Week!’
🥳✔️
At least when The Conservatives were in power you weren’t getting party discontent & changes of leadership all the time.
🇬🇧
🇬🇧
November 12, 2025 at 1:25 PM
At least when The Conservatives were in power you weren’t getting party discontent & changes of leadership all the time.
🇬🇧
🇬🇧
A woman who lives in Dubai & never actually watches the BBC tells us who should be its next Director General.😳
She then tells us who should be chief of an NHS she never uses. Not only that, she comments about Govt. departments that don’t actually govern her!
SmallTalk TV! 😂
She then tells us who should be chief of an NHS she never uses. Not only that, she comments about Govt. departments that don’t actually govern her!
SmallTalk TV! 😂
November 11, 2025 at 1:06 PM
A woman who lives in Dubai & never actually watches the BBC tells us who should be its next Director General.😳
She then tells us who should be chief of an NHS she never uses. Not only that, she comments about Govt. departments that don’t actually govern her!
SmallTalk TV! 😂
She then tells us who should be chief of an NHS she never uses. Not only that, she comments about Govt. departments that don’t actually govern her!
SmallTalk TV! 😂
Tim Davie ex BBC Director General is a woke, liberal chai latte drinking socialist who promotes subversive politics. He deserves his sacking!
What?
He’s a Tory?😳
He was ex chair of Hammersmith & Fulham Conservative Party?
Reinstate him NOW!
The BBC needs people of his calbre!
What?
He’s a Tory?😳
He was ex chair of Hammersmith & Fulham Conservative Party?
Reinstate him NOW!
The BBC needs people of his calbre!
November 10, 2025 at 10:17 AM
Tim Davie ex BBC Director General is a woke, liberal chai latte drinking socialist who promotes subversive politics. He deserves his sacking!
What?
He’s a Tory?😳
He was ex chair of Hammersmith & Fulham Conservative Party?
Reinstate him NOW!
The BBC needs people of his calbre!
What?
He’s a Tory?😳
He was ex chair of Hammersmith & Fulham Conservative Party?
Reinstate him NOW!
The BBC needs people of his calbre!
#RemembranceDay
Love this photo of two of our greatest PMs at the Cenotaph today.
Boris looks trim, fit and very much in good health.
Liz Truss looks as though she’s had a lot of pork recently and might be trickling down for the nation again.
God bless them both!
❤️
Love this photo of two of our greatest PMs at the Cenotaph today.
Boris looks trim, fit and very much in good health.
Liz Truss looks as though she’s had a lot of pork recently and might be trickling down for the nation again.
God bless them both!
❤️
November 9, 2025 at 5:40 PM
#RemembranceDay
Love this photo of two of our greatest PMs at the Cenotaph today.
Boris looks trim, fit and very much in good health.
Liz Truss looks as though she’s had a lot of pork recently and might be trickling down for the nation again.
God bless them both!
❤️
Love this photo of two of our greatest PMs at the Cenotaph today.
Boris looks trim, fit and very much in good health.
Liz Truss looks as though she’s had a lot of pork recently and might be trickling down for the nation again.
God bless them both!
❤️
Pray for Joey Barton tonight.
This gentle tiny chap is much loved.
Underneath that tough slightly pimply exterior lies a man with a small pecker & an odour of Bovril.
He will be kicking himself tonight,studs up of course.
He is truly tolerant but in a sort of intolerant way.
🙏🏻
This gentle tiny chap is much loved.
Underneath that tough slightly pimply exterior lies a man with a small pecker & an odour of Bovril.
He will be kicking himself tonight,studs up of course.
He is truly tolerant but in a sort of intolerant way.
🙏🏻
November 8, 2025 at 10:52 AM
Pray for Joey Barton tonight.
This gentle tiny chap is much loved.
Underneath that tough slightly pimply exterior lies a man with a small pecker & an odour of Bovril.
He will be kicking himself tonight,studs up of course.
He is truly tolerant but in a sort of intolerant way.
🙏🏻
This gentle tiny chap is much loved.
Underneath that tough slightly pimply exterior lies a man with a small pecker & an odour of Bovril.
He will be kicking himself tonight,studs up of course.
He is truly tolerant but in a sort of intolerant way.
🙏🏻
The annual harvest for Michael Fabricant’s hair has just begun in Gloucestershire today.
November 6, 2025 at 10:07 AM
The annual harvest for Michael Fabricant’s hair has just begun in Gloucestershire today.
#RachelReeves
Yes Prits!
Apart from cocking up Covid,
Implementing Brexit,
Partying whilst people died,
Cutting local Govt funding by 40%,
Running down public services
And increasing levels of poverty.
We Conservatives were NEVER business bashing, job destroying or law breaking!
Yes Prits!
Apart from cocking up Covid,
Implementing Brexit,
Partying whilst people died,
Cutting local Govt funding by 40%,
Running down public services
And increasing levels of poverty.
We Conservatives were NEVER business bashing, job destroying or law breaking!
November 4, 2025 at 9:24 AM
#RachelReeves
Yes Prits!
Apart from cocking up Covid,
Implementing Brexit,
Partying whilst people died,
Cutting local Govt funding by 40%,
Running down public services
And increasing levels of poverty.
We Conservatives were NEVER business bashing, job destroying or law breaking!
Yes Prits!
Apart from cocking up Covid,
Implementing Brexit,
Partying whilst people died,
Cutting local Govt funding by 40%,
Running down public services
And increasing levels of poverty.
We Conservatives were NEVER business bashing, job destroying or law breaking!
We had the lovely Carol Fucker around for tea.
She’s the singer with 80’s band T’Cau.
After some cake she said I was a total c*nt.
She called the vicar a twat & told Bunty to go f*ck herself.
She left blaming Ramrod our lab for the rise of knife crime in the UK.
We adored her!🥺
She’s the singer with 80’s band T’Cau.
After some cake she said I was a total c*nt.
She called the vicar a twat & told Bunty to go f*ck herself.
She left blaming Ramrod our lab for the rise of knife crime in the UK.
We adored her!🥺
November 3, 2025 at 9:29 AM
We had the lovely Carol Fucker around for tea.
She’s the singer with 80’s band T’Cau.
After some cake she said I was a total c*nt.
She called the vicar a twat & told Bunty to go f*ck herself.
She left blaming Ramrod our lab for the rise of knife crime in the UK.
We adored her!🥺
She’s the singer with 80’s band T’Cau.
After some cake she said I was a total c*nt.
She called the vicar a twat & told Bunty to go f*ck herself.
She left blaming Ramrod our lab for the rise of knife crime in the UK.
We adored her!🥺
Ladies and gentlemen.
I present to you:
Mr Lee Anderson MP dressed up as a warlock, bleeding from his head, making serious political comment on GB News.
I feel as though I need say no more…
😬
I present to you:
Mr Lee Anderson MP dressed up as a warlock, bleeding from his head, making serious political comment on GB News.
I feel as though I need say no more…
😬
November 1, 2025 at 1:30 PM
Ladies and gentlemen.
I present to you:
Mr Lee Anderson MP dressed up as a warlock, bleeding from his head, making serious political comment on GB News.
I feel as though I need say no more…
😬
I present to you:
Mr Lee Anderson MP dressed up as a warlock, bleeding from his head, making serious political comment on GB News.
I feel as though I need say no more…
😬
Andrew’ punishment?
To live in a 5 bedroom farmhouse on the Sandringham estate.
But what about this lass?
Sarah Ferguson is a loyal,modest & caring mum respected by all.
What is she supposed to do, poor love?
Surely Charles MUST find her at least a 4 bedroom farmhouse to live in?
To live in a 5 bedroom farmhouse on the Sandringham estate.
But what about this lass?
Sarah Ferguson is a loyal,modest & caring mum respected by all.
What is she supposed to do, poor love?
Surely Charles MUST find her at least a 4 bedroom farmhouse to live in?
October 31, 2025 at 10:09 AM
Andrew’ punishment?
To live in a 5 bedroom farmhouse on the Sandringham estate.
But what about this lass?
Sarah Ferguson is a loyal,modest & caring mum respected by all.
What is she supposed to do, poor love?
Surely Charles MUST find her at least a 4 bedroom farmhouse to live in?
To live in a 5 bedroom farmhouse on the Sandringham estate.
But what about this lass?
Sarah Ferguson is a loyal,modest & caring mum respected by all.
What is she supposed to do, poor love?
Surely Charles MUST find her at least a 4 bedroom farmhouse to live in?
We had a Halloween party on the village green for the children yesterday
Bunty came as Carole Malone.
She screeched about migrants whilst pointing her pen at people.
Everyone said it was the most horrific thing they’d seen since Cliff cut his finger in the pub slicing lemon.
🙀
Bunty came as Carole Malone.
She screeched about migrants whilst pointing her pen at people.
Everyone said it was the most horrific thing they’d seen since Cliff cut his finger in the pub slicing lemon.
🙀
October 30, 2025 at 9:38 AM
We had a Halloween party on the village green for the children yesterday
Bunty came as Carole Malone.
She screeched about migrants whilst pointing her pen at people.
Everyone said it was the most horrific thing they’d seen since Cliff cut his finger in the pub slicing lemon.
🙀
Bunty came as Carole Malone.
She screeched about migrants whilst pointing her pen at people.
Everyone said it was the most horrific thing they’d seen since Cliff cut his finger in the pub slicing lemon.
🙀
How very dare The Sun describe me as a ‘fake platform.’ My dear wife Bunty is extremely upset and is already hitting the sherry…🥺
www.thescottishsun.co.uk/news/scottis...
www.thescottishsun.co.uk/news/scottis...
Baroness Bra Michelle Mone mocked after reposting fake praise of her and hubby
MICHELLE Mone has been mocked online after sharing a gushing post about herself – from a fake account. The bra tycoon, 54, reposted a message from a parody account on X/ Twitter using the han…
www.thescottishsun.co.uk
October 29, 2025 at 1:51 PM
How very dare The Sun describe me as a ‘fake platform.’ My dear wife Bunty is extremely upset and is already hitting the sherry…🥺
www.thescottishsun.co.uk/news/scottis...
www.thescottishsun.co.uk/news/scottis...
I’m apparently hot news North of the border. Michelle, Lang may yer lum reek! 😊
www.dailyrecord.co.uk/entertainmen...
www.dailyrecord.co.uk/entertainmen...
Michelle Mone savagely mocked after resharing fake post praising her and husband
The Scots businesswoman reshared a gushing tweet about herself from a parody account
www.dailyrecord.co.uk
October 28, 2025 at 2:07 PM
I’m apparently hot news North of the border. Michelle, Lang may yer lum reek! 😊
www.dailyrecord.co.uk/entertainmen...
www.dailyrecord.co.uk/entertainmen...
Why is it people in this country HATE beautiful and successful people?
The vicious flak & hate mail Michelle Mone & her husband are receiving is totally uncalled for and motivated by envy and jealousy.
Let’s celebrate their success instead of attacking them all the time!
😡
The vicious flak & hate mail Michelle Mone & her husband are receiving is totally uncalled for and motivated by envy and jealousy.
Let’s celebrate their success instead of attacking them all the time!
😡
October 27, 2025 at 10:18 AM
Why is it people in this country HATE beautiful and successful people?
The vicious flak & hate mail Michelle Mone & her husband are receiving is totally uncalled for and motivated by envy and jealousy.
Let’s celebrate their success instead of attacking them all the time!
😡
The vicious flak & hate mail Michelle Mone & her husband are receiving is totally uncalled for and motivated by envy and jealousy.
Let’s celebrate their success instead of attacking them all the time!
😡
Chris Philp will never call Sarah Pochin a racist.
He’d never call Hitler a fascist.
Never call Jack the Ripper a murderer.
Never call Stalin a tyrant.
Why?
Because he is a lovely man & sees the best in everyone.
That’s why he’s loved by all.
Our Saint.❤️
He’d never call Hitler a fascist.
Never call Jack the Ripper a murderer.
Never call Stalin a tyrant.
Why?
Because he is a lovely man & sees the best in everyone.
That’s why he’s loved by all.
Our Saint.❤️
October 26, 2025 at 11:10 AM
Chris Philp will never call Sarah Pochin a racist.
He’d never call Hitler a fascist.
Never call Jack the Ripper a murderer.
Never call Stalin a tyrant.
Why?
Because he is a lovely man & sees the best in everyone.
That’s why he’s loved by all.
Our Saint.❤️
He’d never call Hitler a fascist.
Never call Jack the Ripper a murderer.
Never call Stalin a tyrant.
Why?
Because he is a lovely man & sees the best in everyone.
That’s why he’s loved by all.
Our Saint.❤️
With Claudia & Bess leaving #Strictly, Bunty & I have listed some great replacements:
Rylan & Gary Lineker
Nadine Dorries & Priti Patel
Chaka Demus & Pliers
Lucy Powell & Robert Powell
Cheese & Peas
Ryan Giggs & Judi Dench
Jim Davidson & Satan
Izzy Oaksap & Richard Tights.
🕺
Rylan & Gary Lineker
Nadine Dorries & Priti Patel
Chaka Demus & Pliers
Lucy Powell & Robert Powell
Cheese & Peas
Ryan Giggs & Judi Dench
Jim Davidson & Satan
Izzy Oaksap & Richard Tights.
🕺
October 25, 2025 at 3:06 PM
With Claudia & Bess leaving #Strictly, Bunty & I have listed some great replacements:
Rylan & Gary Lineker
Nadine Dorries & Priti Patel
Chaka Demus & Pliers
Lucy Powell & Robert Powell
Cheese & Peas
Ryan Giggs & Judi Dench
Jim Davidson & Satan
Izzy Oaksap & Richard Tights.
🕺
Rylan & Gary Lineker
Nadine Dorries & Priti Patel
Chaka Demus & Pliers
Lucy Powell & Robert Powell
Cheese & Peas
Ryan Giggs & Judi Dench
Jim Davidson & Satan
Izzy Oaksap & Richard Tights.
🕺
The sad slip in standards now being seen in The Commons.
MPs wearing trainers.
Next it’ll be:
Trainer socks
Trackies
Bikinis
Mankinis
Jeggings
Football tattoos
Nude tractors
Pyjamas
Drag
Thongs
Nipple jewellery
Wrap music
Knives
Skunk
County lines
Graffiti
Jizz
Fungus
Moths.😡
MPs wearing trainers.
Next it’ll be:
Trainer socks
Trackies
Bikinis
Mankinis
Jeggings
Football tattoos
Nude tractors
Pyjamas
Drag
Thongs
Nipple jewellery
Wrap music
Knives
Skunk
County lines
Graffiti
Jizz
Fungus
Moths.😡
October 23, 2025 at 6:38 AM
The sad slip in standards now being seen in The Commons.
MPs wearing trainers.
Next it’ll be:
Trainer socks
Trackies
Bikinis
Mankinis
Jeggings
Football tattoos
Nude tractors
Pyjamas
Drag
Thongs
Nipple jewellery
Wrap music
Knives
Skunk
County lines
Graffiti
Jizz
Fungus
Moths.😡
MPs wearing trainers.
Next it’ll be:
Trainer socks
Trackies
Bikinis
Mankinis
Jeggings
Football tattoos
Nude tractors
Pyjamas
Drag
Thongs
Nipple jewellery
Wrap music
Knives
Skunk
County lines
Graffiti
Jizz
Fungus
Moths.😡
This is Ramrod our lab having gone crazy in our living room.
You can see the guilt.
However he claims he was hacked by another dog.
He has apologised & promised that he has taken steps to ensure that his future canine security is enhanced.
The other photo is of Mike Graham.😉
You can see the guilt.
However he claims he was hacked by another dog.
He has apologised & promised that he has taken steps to ensure that his future canine security is enhanced.
The other photo is of Mike Graham.😉
October 22, 2025 at 9:01 AM
This is Ramrod our lab having gone crazy in our living room.
You can see the guilt.
However he claims he was hacked by another dog.
He has apologised & promised that he has taken steps to ensure that his future canine security is enhanced.
The other photo is of Mike Graham.😉
You can see the guilt.
However he claims he was hacked by another dog.
He has apologised & promised that he has taken steps to ensure that his future canine security is enhanced.
The other photo is of Mike Graham.😉
“Oh look Andrew dear.
Over there.
There’s all your royal titles and privileges…Disappearing!”
👑
Over there.
There’s all your royal titles and privileges…Disappearing!”
👑
October 20, 2025 at 7:34 AM
“Oh look Andrew dear.
Over there.
There’s all your royal titles and privileges…Disappearing!”
👑
Over there.
There’s all your royal titles and privileges…Disappearing!”
👑
I have a terrible confession.🫢
Over the years I too have financially supported Sarah Ferguson.
I have paid for her:
Wrinkle cream
Shaving foam
Porridge
Shabba Ranks CDs
WD-40
Tats
Algebra lessons
Falafel
Jellies
Toe rings
Crash helmets
Knee pads
Dental floss.
I am truly sorry.😔
Over the years I too have financially supported Sarah Ferguson.
I have paid for her:
Wrinkle cream
Shaving foam
Porridge
Shabba Ranks CDs
WD-40
Tats
Algebra lessons
Falafel
Jellies
Toe rings
Crash helmets
Knee pads
Dental floss.
I am truly sorry.😔
October 19, 2025 at 7:30 AM
I have a terrible confession.🫢
Over the years I too have financially supported Sarah Ferguson.
I have paid for her:
Wrinkle cream
Shaving foam
Porridge
Shabba Ranks CDs
WD-40
Tats
Algebra lessons
Falafel
Jellies
Toe rings
Crash helmets
Knee pads
Dental floss.
I am truly sorry.😔
Over the years I too have financially supported Sarah Ferguson.
I have paid for her:
Wrinkle cream
Shaving foam
Porridge
Shabba Ranks CDs
WD-40
Tats
Algebra lessons
Falafel
Jellies
Toe rings
Crash helmets
Knee pads
Dental floss.
I am truly sorry.😔