Brian
@sirfahrenheit.bsky.social
I tempt the whatever from high atop the thing. #SicEm
Finally going to be an uncle I’m going to uncle harder than anyone had ever uncled
November 27, 2025 at 8:41 PM
Finally going to be an uncle I’m going to uncle harder than anyone had ever uncled
If you get this much pie after thanksgiving lunch people get mad.
November 27, 2025 at 7:05 PM
If you get this much pie after thanksgiving lunch people get mad.
I needed a bigger plate guess I’ll have to go back through the line
November 27, 2025 at 6:37 PM
I needed a bigger plate guess I’ll have to go back through the line
Good, either he lives in your heart or he doesn’t, that’s not for commercials
November 27, 2025 at 5:22 PM
Good, either he lives in your heart or he doesn’t, that’s not for commercials
Who’s trying to trade places with the turkey this Thanksgiving?
November 27, 2025 at 4:34 PM
Who’s trying to trade places with the turkey this Thanksgiving?
She just asked if it would be ok if she didn’t get all of the shell of the eggs that are going in the dressing
November 27, 2025 at 3:18 PM
She just asked if it would be ok if she didn’t get all of the shell of the eggs that are going in the dressing
Laaaaiiiiiid back, with my mind on dad’s money and dad’s money on my mind.
November 27, 2025 at 2:05 PM
Laaaaiiiiiid back, with my mind on dad’s money and dad’s money on my mind.
The lighting wasn’t right to get a very detailed picture of her coloring with my phone but I found a big, cool spider at my parent’s house last night.
November 26, 2025 at 6:26 PM
The lighting wasn’t right to get a very detailed picture of her coloring with my phone but I found a big, cool spider at my parent’s house last night.
When you and your siblings move out, your parents start doing weird, inexplicable things. My mom started hanging the bathroom floor mat on the towel rack. There might be a reason that makes sense, I’ll never ask. But do you know how many times I’ve almost wiped my face and/or hands on this?
November 26, 2025 at 3:12 PM
When you and your siblings move out, your parents start doing weird, inexplicable things. My mom started hanging the bathroom floor mat on the towel rack. There might be a reason that makes sense, I’ll never ask. But do you know how many times I’ve almost wiped my face and/or hands on this?
Save Keenan Reynolds from this fate!
November 25, 2025 at 2:46 AM
Save Keenan Reynolds from this fate!
Real fuckin sexy, just like you asked
November 25, 2025 at 1:19 AM
Real fuckin sexy, just like you asked
Maybe the many worlds theory is correct and AI is just fetching answers from alternate realities, you can’t prove that it isn’t.
November 24, 2025 at 4:07 AM
Maybe the many worlds theory is correct and AI is just fetching answers from alternate realities, you can’t prove that it isn’t.
Last gym day until after Thanksgiving probably 😕
November 23, 2025 at 3:25 PM
Last gym day until after Thanksgiving probably 😕
I got a unicorn horn for a (stop)
November 23, 2025 at 2:29 PM
I got a unicorn horn for a (stop)
Now I'm falling asleep, and she′s calling a cab
While he's having a smoke, and she's taking a drag
Now they′re going to bed, and my stomach is sick
And it′s all in my head, but she's touching his chest now
He takes off her dress now, let me go
While he's having a smoke, and she's taking a drag
Now they′re going to bed, and my stomach is sick
And it′s all in my head, but she's touching his chest now
He takes off her dress now, let me go
November 23, 2025 at 1:33 PM
Now I'm falling asleep, and she′s calling a cab
While he's having a smoke, and she's taking a drag
Now they′re going to bed, and my stomach is sick
And it′s all in my head, but she's touching his chest now
He takes off her dress now, let me go
While he's having a smoke, and she's taking a drag
Now they′re going to bed, and my stomach is sick
And it′s all in my head, but she's touching his chest now
He takes off her dress now, let me go
Despite all my rage
I am still just a rat in a cage
I am still just a rat in a cage
November 23, 2025 at 1:25 PM
Despite all my rage
I am still just a rat in a cage
I am still just a rat in a cage
Domestic Edition of the @theonion.com article
November 23, 2025 at 12:44 PM
Domestic Edition of the @theonion.com article
This took forever to find
November 23, 2025 at 1:15 AM
This took forever to find
This is my favorite shirt right now
November 23, 2025 at 12:09 AM
This is my favorite shirt right now
I say that I want the baby to stop acting up in school, and I do, but I also see this and the only thing I wonder is if 1 is enough.
November 22, 2025 at 11:17 PM
I say that I want the baby to stop acting up in school, and I do, but I also see this and the only thing I wonder is if 1 is enough.