Sarah
@sarahthegardner.bsky.social
Writer, reader, person who lies down. Excels at cheese consumption.
I wrote this as an ode to Minnesotans and a fuck off to ice. 🖤🧊
“Minnesota Warm: Anything above 8 degrees Fahrenheit.” By @sarahthegardner.bsky.social
Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/new-alternat...
Full piece: thebelladonnacomedy.com/new-alternat...
February 5, 2026 at 11:58 PM
I wrote this as an ode to Minnesotans and a fuck off to ice. 🖤🧊
"People often misunderstand nonviolent protest. It is not merely eschewing violence. It doesn’t mean that we are silent or that we are not angry. Instead, nonviolent protest means, among many things, that we understand who we are fighting."
I wrote about how we're dealing with a war of attrition at the hands of a callous and cruel administration, and how we cannot let them whittle us down to their level. www.nytimes.com/2026/02/03/o...
Opinion | One Thing Trump Can’t Do to Us
www.nytimes.com
February 4, 2026 at 12:38 AM
"People often misunderstand nonviolent protest. It is not merely eschewing violence. It doesn’t mean that we are silent or that we are not angry. Instead, nonviolent protest means, among many things, that we understand who we are fighting."
Reposted by Sarah
Remember the other day when I was saluting my friend Greg Ketter, owner of Minneapolis’ DreamHaven Books? This is him the following day. Greg will never say this, so I will — now is a great time to buy books from DreamHaven. Support Americans who stand up vs. 🧊. dreamhavenbooks.com
January 25, 2026 at 5:32 PM
Remember the other day when I was saluting my friend Greg Ketter, owner of Minneapolis’ DreamHaven Books? This is him the following day. Greg will never say this, so I will — now is a great time to buy books from DreamHaven. Support Americans who stand up vs. 🧊. dreamhavenbooks.com
Love editing my 1400 word post to 1200 words so I wind up with 1500 words. #writermath
January 23, 2026 at 8:21 PM
Love editing my 1400 word post to 1200 words so I wind up with 1500 words. #writermath
I’m asking too much from the gay hockey player show, but it’s not fixing my anxiety about the state of the world.
January 9, 2026 at 3:02 PM
I’m asking too much from the gay hockey player show, but it’s not fixing my anxiety about the state of the world.
Reposted by Sarah
January 9, 2026 at 1:02 PM
Spent some quality time with my bestie this morning: the paper shredder.
January 1, 2026 at 6:44 PM
Spent some quality time with my bestie this morning: the paper shredder.
There are simply not enough little treats in the world for me to do my job right now.
December 12, 2025 at 8:19 PM
There are simply not enough little treats in the world for me to do my job right now.
I did this! It helped!
The new iPhone update is nauseating with everything being animated. I highly recommend reducing motion under the accessibility settings.
You’ll thank me, I swear.
You’ll thank me, I swear.
December 11, 2025 at 2:13 PM
I did this! It helped!
The new iPhone update is violent.
December 11, 2025 at 2:11 PM
The new iPhone update is violent.
Regular therapy is for summer. It’s winter, tell my therapist I need:
December 10, 2025 at 9:42 PM
Regular therapy is for summer. It’s winter, tell my therapist I need:
My least favorite part about AI so far is that when I see, “Weird Al” I question whether I’m reading about one of the greatest musicians of our time or a new strange development in or technological hellscape.
December 10, 2025 at 1:59 PM
My least favorite part about AI so far is that when I see, “Weird Al” I question whether I’m reading about one of the greatest musicians of our time or a new strange development in or technological hellscape.
“May god have mercy on my soul.” Me, entering CostCo without a cart.
December 9, 2025 at 1:18 PM
“May god have mercy on my soul.” Me, entering CostCo without a cart.
Good morning! I am ready for bed!
December 4, 2025 at 1:25 PM
Good morning! I am ready for bed!
Send more tattoos.
November 19, 2025 at 11:39 PM
Send more tattoos.
Women over a certain age age up at 3am because we’ve evolved to cast spells with our coven at that time.
November 19, 2025 at 4:01 AM
Women over a certain age age up at 3am because we’ve evolved to cast spells with our coven at that time.
If y’all ever want to get me a present, know that I have a very full cart at bookshop.org.
November 3, 2025 at 11:52 PM
If y’all ever want to get me a present, know that I have a very full cart at bookshop.org.
I’m in Philly for the week and the muscle memory of glaring down cars that are about to hit you as you walk in front of them is in TACT. 💅🏻
October 9, 2025 at 2:50 PM
I’m in Philly for the week and the muscle memory of glaring down cars that are about to hit you as you walk in front of them is in TACT. 💅🏻
Made my new therapist laugh in our first session so the bar is set and I can look forward to chasing that high at every session following.
October 2, 2025 at 5:39 PM
Made my new therapist laugh in our first session so the bar is set and I can look forward to chasing that high at every session following.
I am at the “cleaning the house feels like a fun treat” point of my to do list.
September 29, 2025 at 3:36 PM
I am at the “cleaning the house feels like a fun treat” point of my to do list.
More bake-off tonight and learning that Iain is baller enough to land a lady who is a foot taller than him and attends a regular pole dancing class. Still rooting for Jessika, this drag king.
September 28, 2025 at 2:58 AM
More bake-off tonight and learning that Iain is baller enough to land a lady who is a foot taller than him and attends a regular pole dancing class. Still rooting for Jessika, this drag king.
In January my optimistic ass set a goal to submit 50 times in 2025.
I just submitted #13. 🫠
I just submitted #13. 🫠
September 25, 2025 at 12:11 PM
In January my optimistic ass set a goal to submit 50 times in 2025.
I just submitted #13. 🫠
I just submitted #13. 🫠
GBBO really said, “and Jessika is a drag king by night.” AND LEFT IT THERE LIKE I DIDNT NEED TO SEE EVERY DRAG PERFORMANCE JESSIKA HAS DONE?!?
September 21, 2025 at 5:37 PM
GBBO really said, “and Jessika is a drag king by night.” AND LEFT IT THERE LIKE I DIDNT NEED TO SEE EVERY DRAG PERFORMANCE JESSIKA HAS DONE?!?
The internet used to be louder and nicer and honestly? Same.
September 11, 2025 at 1:30 PM
The internet used to be louder and nicer and honestly? Same.