I’ve not had an experience writing over the years on other projects where things feel so organic, where it feels like all my influences paid off and tied in, where my own realizations are so fluid. I don’t know if I will after. It’s an incredible feeling

All the cards together. Some positioned carefully to pull off the move that makes the effect. Sat back and grinned when I finished.
It feels like for nine years I was setting up a card trick without realizing it and now I’m getting the payoffs. Wild how you lay your own groundwork without noticing

There’s a lot of stories I respect that have scenes about domino effects and illustrate accordingly. Butterfly affect with butterfly imagery, etc
I grabbed some smoke in my fingertips tonight and held it. I got the page written where the trick ties in
-

Since then, 9 years on, been wresting with the whole card trick motif.
This new perspective on framing the characters’ stories against the worldbuilding shifted that. The “trick” I realized can’t be about any one character but about their journeys. can’t pick a card without a deck -

I realized in the year after that that framework and description of the steps of the trick unconsciously too heavily matched the pledge turn prestige framework of The Prestige film. And it was too heavy-handed. Took away from the story. Quickly scrapped.

For too long in writing and in art I tried to make things work without working on what made me uncomfortable. For a while it was getting personal and vulnerable. I tackled that a while ago, and yet-still missing something. I’ve found it now. Almost time to bleed some ink out

I’m excited, because it’s gonna elevate the best thing I’ve ever written to be better
I’m scared because it’s going to be difficult and push me and challenge me. I’m so anxious to start because if I make it work, the process will guide me in every other WIP I’ve got

I went back to some old favorites this past year and found many new. I hit a peak this past week or so. A culmination. A clarity. Nebulous until last night and today. Now it’s like “I was building a puzzle, I could see the box art. I was missing about 50 key pieces”

“My favorite stories are..” and I list off based on those found family, found community based parts of the story. But what makes them WORK is how they are influenced by the world. I couldn’t puzzle that together with mine

In sum, complete emotional arcs from the MCs. Not a good payoff to what as set up on the whole. The stories I love are centered on the interpersonal stuff in a small group, and that drives home the stuff in the larger world. I failed to think of that