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primordial.bsky.social
prim (hobbit mode)
@primordial.bsky.social
2K followers 1.2K following 22K posts
she/they. 34. queer leftist. neurospicy multidisciplinary artist. a reply guy but only for pics of your pets. MPLS. november is #LOTRMonth.
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primordial.bsky.social
"Far away
now almost due south
the mountain-walls of Mordor loomed

like a black bar
of rugged clouds
floating above
a dangerous fog-bound sea."

such a good poet
"On either side and in front wide fens and mires now lay, stretching away southward and eastward into the dim half-light. Mists curled and smoked from dark and noisome pools. The reek of them hung stifling in the still air. Far away, now almost due south, the mountain-walls of Mordor loomed, like a black bar of rugged clouds floating above a dangerous fog-bound sea."
November 29, 2025 at 7:16 PM
primordial.bsky.social
This isn't exactly "breaking news" to anyone. But, a visual:

The yellow post-its indicate chapters dedicated to the "Three Hunters" (Aragorn, Legolas, Gimli).

Blue indicates the Other Hobbits (Merry & Pippin).

Green is when those two groups join together.

And pink is for Frodo, Sam, and Gollum.
It is the 1965 paperback edition of JRR Tolkien's The Lord of the Rings, Part Two: The Two Towers. The paperback has yellowed pages and gorgeous artwork on the front. There are small post-its indicating chapters: two yellow, two blue, four yellow, three green, and then ten pink. It is the 1965 paperback edition of JRR Tolkien's The Lord of the Rings, Part Two: The Two Towers. (I have turned the book slightly to show more of its side.) The paperback has yellowed pages and gorgeous artwork on the front. There are small post-its indicating chapters: two yellow, two blue, four yellow, three green, and then ten pink. It is the 1965 paperback edition of JRR Tolkien's The Lord of the Rings, Part Two: The Two Towers. (I have turned the book so the pages themselves are more central than the cover.) The paperback has yellowed pages and gorgeous artwork on the front. There are small post-its indicating chapters: two yellow, two blue, four yellow, three green, and then ten pink.
November 29, 2025 at 6:38 PM
primordial.bsky.social
you sure fucking are, Samwise. 🥲
Samwise Gamgee in the movie The Two Towers is smiling lightly while repeating Frodo's title for him: "Samwise the Brave"
November 29, 2025 at 4:49 AM
primordial.bsky.social
Aragorn asking himself, "How high do I need to get to erase that godawful soup from my memory"
A picture of my TV. Viggo Mortenson (as Aragorn in The Two Towers) has a long pipe. He is staring off into the distance, lost in thought about an elf woman who probably makes palatable soup (the bar is low)
November 29, 2025 at 1:17 AM
primordial.bsky.social
wait damnit. Pretend this was supplement #7 and add one to the numbers after it pretty please. (Translation of the Lament for Gandalf in Lothlorien)
tolkiengateway.net/wiki/Lament_...
Olórin, who once was... Sent by the Lords of the West To guard the lands of the East Wisest of all Maiar What drove you to leave That which you loved? Mithrandir, Mithrandir O Pilgrim Grey No more will you wander the green fields of this earth Your journey has ended in darkness. The bonds cut, the spirit broken The Flame of Anor has left this World A great light, extinguished.
November 29, 2025 at 12:32 AM
primordial.bsky.social
2T SUPPLEMENT #5: Translation of "Lament for Théodred"
Now dear Théodred lies in darkness, most loyal of fighters. The sound of the harp shall not wake the warrior; nor shall the man hold a golden wine-cup, nor good hawk swing through the hall, nor the swift horse stamp in the courtyard. An evil death has set forth the noble warrior A song shall sing the sorrowing minstrels of Meduseld That noble cousin, who always held me dear Now is held in darkness, enclosed.
November 29, 2025 at 12:26 AM
primordial.bsky.social
It is known
Oscar, an orange cat, is sitting on my lap
November 29, 2025 at 12:05 AM
primordial.bsky.social
FRODO. You are in a disgusting bog with dead people in it. Close your MOUTH
A picture of my TV in which Frodo is in a bog, green water and algae around him. His mouth and eyes are open wide, letting gross dead people bogwater in.
November 28, 2025 at 8:35 PM
primordial.bsky.social
2T SUPPLEMENT #2.1
A screenshot of a tumblr thread. User rohirrim of the north says: "jrr tolkien: 'i really love my wife. i will make her into a beautiful, unearthly half-angel princess who beat satan almost single-handedly and won an argument with the keeper of the halls of the dead' jrr tolkien: 'i really love my best friend. i will make him into a grumpy old tree who never gets to the point'" User triss19 adds: "If this isn't the best example of the difference between the relationship you should have with your wife and your best friend I don't know what is."
November 28, 2025 at 8:24 PM
primordial.bsky.social
2T SUPPLEMENT #2: enter C.S. Treebeard
Screenshot of a tumblr thread. User lesbianrey says: "hi i'm tolkien here are my ocs. i call them Elves (not elfs!!! if you call them elfs i will block you) they look like humans but they're tall, live forever, and have pointy ears. that's it bye" User katobleps says: "cs lewis: 'are you alright with constructive criticism? i dont want to sound mean' tolkien: 'no go ahead i want to hear it' cs lewis: 'they fucking suck' tolkien: 'thats not constructive criticism'" User lazytechsupport says: "cs lewis: 'here's my OC, it's jesus but he's a lion' tolkien: 'Furry' cs lewis: 'blocked'" User bluepaladinredlion says: "Tolkien: 'lamp posts don't exist in fantasy worlds' Cs Lewis: 'ok you know what fuck you'" User 4setsofcorsets says: "CS Lewis: 'I could beta for you if you want. help you trim the fat on your stories' Tolkien: 'what do you mean' CS Lewis: 'I just. you describe a lot of trees. are trees that important' Tolkien: 'just you fucking wait. trees are SO important.' and that day, Tolkien invented ents" User jordisstigander says: "CS Lewis: 'Not more trees.' Tolkien: 'This one's based on you.'"
November 28, 2025 at 8:20 PM
primordial.bsky.social
I paid $200. If I'd have known how dumb she was I might have balked at $20. (I love her so much)
A fluffy tortie cat sits roundly on my lap
November 28, 2025 at 2:11 AM
primordial.bsky.social
I let Almond sniff the
brandywine. She is offended.
A blurry photo of Prim holding the glass of mellon brandywine out towards a fluffy tortie cat, Almond. The cat is backing away from the glass in disgust.
November 28, 2025 at 12:53 AM
primordial.bsky.social
FOTR SUPPLEMENT 3.1
As we prepare to leave Rivendell, this Brandywine is made with
*clears throat*
mellon.

I'm so sorry
It is another glass of wine with pieces of melon floating at the bottom. It is on my cluttered end table. In the background, if you zoom in, you can see Bilbo's creepy face snarling because Frodo is denying him access to The Precious
November 28, 2025 at 12:30 AM
primordial.bsky.social
FOTR SUPPLEMENT #3: BRANDYWINE

Step 1: Brandy
Step 2: Wine
Step 3 (optional): Fresh or frozen fruit

Drink with caution; it goes down so smoothly you won't feel like you're getting drunk until you're singing showtunes at 2 AM before passing out on the couch
A glass of some fresh berries floating in wine atop a wooden coaster on a messy white end table.
November 27, 2025 at 10:31 PM
primordial.bsky.social
Oh no. She didn't start watching until they showed the writing on the ring. She's far too invested in this Power thing.
Almond, a fluffy tortie, is sitting on my cluttered desk staring up at my TV. Ian McKellan is on screen in his role as Gandalf in The Fellowship of the Ring. He is saying, "And in the darkness bind them."
November 27, 2025 at 9:07 PM
primordial.bsky.social
Happy A Shortcut to Mushrooms day to all who celebrate.
It is a mushroom and spinach pizza fresh from the oven, sitting on a pizza stone. By "fresh" I mean it was from the frozen pizza aisle at the grocery store. By "oven" I mean my toaster oven + air fryer.
November 27, 2025 at 7:47 PM
primordial.bsky.social
HELL YEAH, Soleil won!!! She was my fave of the finalists. So frickin pretty
A black Belgian Sheepdog (large and fluffy) named Soleil
November 27, 2025 at 6:56 PM
primordial.bsky.social
This perm is amazing
It's a small white and grey terrier with a big poofy hairdo. Sorry I didn't get the breed or dog name
November 27, 2025 at 6:44 PM
primordial.bsky.social
... I don't even have a joke about the flat face terrier. You are a weird beautiful thing
I think this dog is a Bedlington named Fido? I was too busy taking a picture to tell. It has a very very flat face
November 27, 2025 at 6:39 PM
primordial.bsky.social
lmao @luna.starts.party @jozarth.net
It's a picture of most popular dog name by U.S. state. Bella has many states, largely around the eastern half. Luna has many states, largely around the Western half. Minnesota's most popular is Luna
November 27, 2025 at 6:17 PM
primordial.bsky.social
The Mop Queen
Rozsika is a Komondor. She has big white cords of fur covering her face. Imagine a white mop and you're most of the way there.
November 27, 2025 at 6:14 PM
primordial.bsky.social
The anti-marshmallow
A black Newfoundland named Storm. He's very floofy. I love him
November 27, 2025 at 6:12 PM
primordial.bsky.social
This Samoyed (Larger Marshmallow) deserves his regal name (Prince Louis)
It's a Samoyed--white and fluffy--named Prince Louis
November 27, 2025 at 6:06 PM
primordial.bsky.social
Look I was gonna make another mop joke but this dog stole my heart
Timo, a Colon de Tulear. She's short, all white, and so much fur. She's magnificent.
November 27, 2025 at 5:55 PM
primordial.bsky.social
This is not a dog. This is several giant marshmallows baked together. (I love you, bichon. I'm sorry I don't remember your name)
An incredibly fluffy white bichon friesse (sp?) on the left. There's a backstage view on the right of a dog lying down
November 27, 2025 at 5:48 PM