pauluwagboe.bsky.social
@pauluwagboe.bsky.social
When Superman activates his super-hearing, how come he only hears people shouting for help? How come he never hears the woman across town getting her back blown out by the landscaper while her husband's at a sales conference in Chattanooga?
November 30, 2025 at 1:05 PM
School:

"You need to learn to do this in your head. In the real world you won't always have a calculator with you."

The real world:

"I didn't have a calculator with me, so I just did the maths in my head."

"What are you, insane? Go find a calculator!"
November 26, 2025 at 7:05 PM
Some people shouldn't be allowed phones.
November 24, 2025 at 7:31 PM
New favourite music video trope: "I found a bed in this abandoned warehouse, so I decided to get the girls round."
November 22, 2025 at 7:24 PM
Currently rolling these out across my workplace. That's one way to keep the dust out, I suppose!
November 21, 2025 at 7:48 PM
Reposted
These articles always depend on a bizarre Schroedinger's Seattle: The city is falling apart due to progressive overreach but we should have re-elected the conservative non-socialist who has been in charge for the last four years.
November 17, 2025 at 2:28 PM
I always thought that voters abandoning politicians when those politicians abandon their principles was generally perceived as a good thing (see: John Fetterman), but does the message still ring the same if the politician's initial principles were actually cheeks?

www.nbcnews.com/politics/con...
Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene says she's received threats amid deepening feud with Trump
The Georgia representative's revelation comes after Trump rescinded his support and suggested he would back a primary challenger against her.
www.nbcnews.com
November 16, 2025 at 7:12 PM
November 14, 2025 at 5:57 PM
"Every 3 times I swing this axe at my ankle, my foot just falls off!"
November 13, 2025 at 6:11 PM
"Right, that's our customary 2 minutes honouring those who died fighting fascism. Now, back to our fascism!"
November 11, 2025 at 1:21 PM
November 6, 2025 at 10:30 PM
November 4, 2025 at 12:40 AM
October 29, 2025 at 8:09 PM
I never really thought of myself as one of those "doing the jobs that British people won't do" type of immigrants, but the last time my department had a vacancy we received so few applicants we had to bring back the last guy who left.
October 27, 2025 at 11:20 PM
I emailed my employer as I hadn't received 2 weeks worth of wages and that I (don't) have the (missing) text messages to prove it, and this was the response I got:
October 20, 2025 at 6:45 PM
This Feels Significant

#ElisAndJohn
October 15, 2025 at 6:12 PM
It's official, racism has overtaken capitalism as America's primary ideology.
October 11, 2025 at 6:55 PM
I was troubleshooting the laptop of one of my Gen-Z colleagues by plugging in a network cable, and she looked at the cable and said "is this some kind of non-wireless Wi-Fi?" and all my bones immediately crumbled to dust.
October 10, 2025 at 4:21 PM
One user was so grateful for all the time I spent fixing his phone he bought me and my team a tin of sewing supplies.
October 9, 2025 at 12:17 PM
It's all the same stuff, people, can't we all just get along?
October 6, 2025 at 11:10 PM
It happened again.
October 4, 2025 at 4:50 PM
Reading is hard.
October 3, 2025 at 6:50 PM
"You could have caused an international incident."

"I'm sorry, is one country invading another not already an "international incident"?

"But who gave you the right to interfere in another nation's affairs?"

"The same people that gave Boravia the right to do exactly the same thing, now shut up."
September 29, 2025 at 7:29 AM
I could never work on a building site. I'd be saying stuff like "chuck us another can of "Francois", would you mate?" and everyone would look at me like I was an insane person.
September 25, 2025 at 10:38 PM