MY FAVORITE AND FOREVER JEFFY

I love being able to send him sappy tiktoks followed by cursed memes

I love giving him random essays ranging from darth vader to psych studies

I love sending him love notes expressing how much something he did/said means to me

and none of it is too much to him

I’m not too much either, but enough

I thought whenever I would get in a relationship where I wasn’t kept a secret I would be using the word “boyfriend” constantly and when I tried, it felt weird

then he said life partner once and I realized it’s because THAT is so much more accurate

legit every morning being his feels like christmas

comorbities is a term being used more and more in the general public but is still feels new

humans are complex and it’s rare that we’re textbook, so seeing how some things overlap and seemingly cancel each other out IS fascinating

ex. my autism putting restraints on one very specific impulse, wild

I also promise my therapist wasn’t invalidating me so don’t come for her HAHA

she brought up this fact very gingerly after months of her knowing I was 100% a pervert with a high drive

and it led to more healing about an insecurity I didn’t know how to bring up which was “I can’t even do BPD right”

I never fit in with girls OR guys, but was tolerated/able to relate a lot more to males due to my own biology, upbringing, and trauma

this made me feel isolated, but it gave me a gift: the ability to see and listen to anyone with less bias

we have bias, that’s human, but don’t let it control you

to be met with “you’re a pick me bitch” or “you’re just trying to win points with guys” when stating objective facts I’ve learned and wanted to spread awareness about is nothing else but misandry

and the fact it’s rare to come across someone who even knows what misandry MEANS says a lot in itself

fight or flight and constant adrenaline and cortisol dumps wreck havoc on your body, your digestive and reproductive system legit just shut down

and women, especially with PCOS, store estrogen in their fat, it's part of the genetic mutation, so as you lose weight, that estrogen is being released

also anyone curious, I'm 100% sure that PCOS saved me from typical periods up until now, my higher testosterone kept those symptoms at bay

why is it coming back? I think because I'm exiting out of lifelong fight or flight and the older anyone gets, male or female, the less testosterone they have

there is 100000% brain dead heroes in the game but I learned not to get insulted when someone says that about who I’m playing because that screenshot perfectly illustrates what I want more people to understand

“brain dead” heroes can absolutely be played strategically and it makes them MONSTERS

AND ALSO YES C&D IS AN EASY KIT

but it took me over a year to become that “nightmare” c&d who can sometimes carry

auto-aim allows me to think less about aiming and more about when and how to use cloak, which enemy to distract, etc.

also it is called a STRATEGIST class not healer for a reason

the way I’m half asleep and was like OMG I HAVE THIS I MUST TELL THEM HOW AMAZING IT IS

seriously I’ve been gaming literally all day while we’re off and not once did they give me that sore feeling around my ears that I feel so easily from any headset