I’m coming up with something on the spot; They have a common ancestor 6 generations ago.

Wait, what did you misread? Now I’m confused

I need to meet some arbitrary goals first to feel confident enough for stuff like that.

Oh, very. Pretend some magic is involved

That was over a month ago. I’ve managed to recover the important stuff, thankfully. I’m still slightly pissed, but I’m mostly doing alright.