This is also the fault of adults. The administrations in charge of setting policy

Also I’m not valorizing marriage. I think marriage is a deeply harmful and suffocating institution for most women, and most of us are far better off unmarried, both with and without kids. But if you’re one of the rare women in a loving, healthy, equitable marriage? Love that for you

We continually expect girls and women to manage everyone’s emotions. I’m sick of it

Very true. And very unfair

Thanks for the thoughtful conversation! Really reminds me that at some point, a generation is going to have to stop pointing fingers at the previous generation and blaming them for all of its problems and instead actually do the hard work to fix this shit

That part. We just won’t do it. Which means we need far better leaders than the ones we have

Such an important and nuanced response - thank you!

You are. But I admire you for modeling that for them. For some of those kids, you may have been the only person doing so. That matters a hell of a lot

Oh and cooking for each other! And being in nature! There is so much more to life than the shallow, empty shit we keep feeding the ppl we owe the most, which is our kids

Brunch and concerts and Netflix and shopping and sports will not sustain us, and that is what a lot of kids watch the adults around them spend their free time on. We have built this shitty societal infrastructure by pushing to the sidelines what matters, which is lifelong learning, art, and love

I also think it takes time and further brain development beyond college for a lot of kids to get there. Which is why we’re in trouble

I def don’t think OP meant it that way either. And kids do need to take responsibility. But where do they learn that? Who models that for them? An awful lot of adults are simply phoning in their own lives. And if that’s the model, and future in the U.S. is bleak, then I get the lack of motivation

🫶🏻

Yes! And it is because adults refuse to hold themselves accountable! Many adults don’t model accountability in their own lives - we see it every damn day on social media and in the news. What do we expect when we are hypocrites??

Adults are notorious for saying this is how you should live to children and then doing the exact opposite. We need to take responsibility and do some hard fucking work that examine how shallow and materialistic our own lives are if we have any hope of helping our children

And no, this is not OP’s fault or meant as a diss to them - the problems they talk about are real! But the solution lies with adults behavior first. We actually have to model something healthy for them to pattern it. There’s no way around that

We live in a fascist, warmongering society that has been communicating through policy and action for years that vulnerable ppl can get fucked and that what matters in life is money and fame. We have continually made decisions that prioritize our comfort over meaningful change. This is our fault.