Mark Heiliger
@markheiliger.bsky.social
Regretting my life choices
https://letterboxd.com/markheiliger/
https://letterboxd.com/markheiliger/
When the AI bubble finally pops, I can't wait to see all the finance pundits on TV sweating bullets saying, "Nobody saw this coming!" Then I will return to hunting pigeons for food and boiling gutter water because AI stole my jerb before it tanked every big company in the world.
February 10, 2026 at 12:38 AM
When the AI bubble finally pops, I can't wait to see all the finance pundits on TV sweating bullets saying, "Nobody saw this coming!" Then I will return to hunting pigeons for food and boiling gutter water because AI stole my jerb before it tanked every big company in the world.
I haven't heard anyone talk about Pewdiepie lately. Did Mr. Beast eat his heart or something to absorb his power?
February 9, 2026 at 10:23 PM
I haven't heard anyone talk about Pewdiepie lately. Did Mr. Beast eat his heart or something to absorb his power?
When did Super Bowl halftime shows become haunted house mazes? Has it been like this for a while?
February 9, 2026 at 10:13 PM
When did Super Bowl halftime shows become haunted house mazes? Has it been like this for a while?
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February 8, 2026 at 2:04 AM
Wordle 1,694 2/6
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How come Ariel is not very familiar with the word "feet"? What an idiot.
February 7, 2026 at 10:35 PM
How come Ariel is not very familiar with the word "feet"? What an idiot.
I hope the next president doesn't want to be a celebrity too.
February 7, 2026 at 5:33 AM
I hope the next president doesn't want to be a celebrity too.
I think he shut down the Kennedy Center because he knows he'll be dead within two years and it will become someone else's problem.
February 2, 2026 at 9:08 PM
I think he shut down the Kennedy Center because he knows he'll be dead within two years and it will become someone else's problem.
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February 1, 2026 at 6:50 PM
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Guess which movie.
January 31, 2026 at 9:51 PM
Guess which movie.
I wake up every day hoping to hear some good news.
January 25, 2026 at 6:53 PM
I wake up every day hoping to hear some good news.
The scariest thing about Conjuring 4 is how annoying this stupid family is.
January 18, 2026 at 12:21 AM
The scariest thing about Conjuring 4 is how annoying this stupid family is.
You can win a lot more fights if you are determined to put a thumb in the other fellow's eye.
January 17, 2026 at 4:33 PM
You can win a lot more fights if you are determined to put a thumb in the other fellow's eye.
The Nobel Foundation should just board up the windows now. One fucking overgrown toddler and one sycophantic award recipient (who will surely be disappointed soon) is all it took to turn the Nobel Peace Prize into a motherfucking joke. Holy fucking shit. These people broke every brain in the world.
January 16, 2026 at 4:32 AM
The Nobel Foundation should just board up the windows now. One fucking overgrown toddler and one sycophantic award recipient (who will surely be disappointed soon) is all it took to turn the Nobel Peace Prize into a motherfucking joke. Holy fucking shit. These people broke every brain in the world.
People who "stand behind law enforcement" are still a bit afraid of standing in front of them.
January 15, 2026 at 3:57 PM
People who "stand behind law enforcement" are still a bit afraid of standing in front of them.
I would love to live in Ireland. But if they let in everyone who wanted to live in Ireland, I would probably not want to live in Ireland.
January 15, 2026 at 1:40 AM
I would love to live in Ireland. But if they let in everyone who wanted to live in Ireland, I would probably not want to live in Ireland.
I maintain that this country as an idea and an ideal was over as soon as the Supreme Court handed the election to Bush. Everything since then has been a train careening towards a broken section of tracks and we have lacked the energy to stop its momentum. The train will have to crash at this point.
January 12, 2026 at 5:17 PM
I maintain that this country as an idea and an ideal was over as soon as the Supreme Court handed the election to Bush. Everything since then has been a train careening towards a broken section of tracks and we have lacked the energy to stop its momentum. The train will have to crash at this point.
To paraphrase Gen. Patton, in times of war it is not your job to die for your cause. It's to make the other son of a bitch die for HIS cause.
January 9, 2026 at 6:17 PM
To paraphrase Gen. Patton, in times of war it is not your job to die for your cause. It's to make the other son of a bitch die for HIS cause.
“The nine most terrifying words in the English language are ‘I’m from the government and I’m here to help.’” - Ronald Reagan
But the people who love this quote are extremely gung ho about sending that same government into a foreign country to conduct an illegal coup in order to take their oil.
But the people who love this quote are extremely gung ho about sending that same government into a foreign country to conduct an illegal coup in order to take their oil.
January 3, 2026 at 9:33 PM
“The nine most terrifying words in the English language are ‘I’m from the government and I’m here to help.’” - Ronald Reagan
But the people who love this quote are extremely gung ho about sending that same government into a foreign country to conduct an illegal coup in order to take their oil.
But the people who love this quote are extremely gung ho about sending that same government into a foreign country to conduct an illegal coup in order to take their oil.
Got my first ever "violent threats" removal on a Twitter post showing Trump struggling to keep his eyes open and swaying in place for commenting "Please just let him fall over..."
Boom, violent threat detected right away, 24 hour ban. I guess gravity and sleepiness have no Twitter account.
Boom, violent threat detected right away, 24 hour ban. I guess gravity and sleepiness have no Twitter account.
January 3, 2026 at 5:41 PM
Got my first ever "violent threats" removal on a Twitter post showing Trump struggling to keep his eyes open and swaying in place for commenting "Please just let him fall over..."
Boom, violent threat detected right away, 24 hour ban. I guess gravity and sleepiness have no Twitter account.
Boom, violent threat detected right away, 24 hour ban. I guess gravity and sleepiness have no Twitter account.
Now that 85% of the entire Los Angeles population has filled out Netflix's "Expression of Interest - Feature Animation", maybe they should actually start, I dunno, FUCKING HIRING PEOPLE AGAIN.
January 2, 2026 at 5:26 PM
Now that 85% of the entire Los Angeles population has filled out Netflix's "Expression of Interest - Feature Animation", maybe they should actually start, I dunno, FUCKING HIRING PEOPLE AGAIN.
Weren't all of those holodeck episodes of TNG not sufficient warning against generative AI?
December 31, 2025 at 2:50 AM
Weren't all of those holodeck episodes of TNG not sufficient warning against generative AI?
I don't know if I'm the first one to say this, but... I think the Stranger Things magic is gone, man. Good timing too since it's their last season.
December 26, 2025 at 8:51 PM
I don't know if I'm the first one to say this, but... I think the Stranger Things magic is gone, man. Good timing too since it's their last season.