I stopped trying to date. It's been almost a year now. I decided that i will not have a partner, for they deserve to be loved, but i cannot give them that.

Maybe someday i will find the ability to love someone and my opinion will change

I tried dating a few times(both men and women) after i broke up with her. Cus maybe different people will make me feel different. But no, it just makes it clearer that there's something wrong with me.

I thought to myself that i have never felt that strongly for anyone

Even my mom said that i don't know how to love someone. (I don't say sweet stuff to my family, rarely initiate hugs and rarely give them anything)

I heard my friends talk about how they miss their lovers when they are apart. Or how even little accidents made them cry over how worried they were.

I felt safe being with her, i wanted to spend time with her. But i dont feel attracted to her. And sometimes doing stuff for her feels tiring. Which i think is not how it's supposed to be when u love someone

(2/2)
RIP Aven 🙏

Ahhhh i forgot his tattoo