Lew
@lew-mh.bsky.social
Trans 🏳️⚧️ ASD. Navigating the world post burnout.
Valentine's day is not my thing but this year I've booked a big meal out for my wife. I'm terrible with words so I'm hoping the meal will help to show how sorry I am for everything I put her through when I was unwell along with thanking her for pulling me out the other side of it all.
February 9, 2026 at 8:58 PM
Valentine's day is not my thing but this year I've booked a big meal out for my wife. I'm terrible with words so I'm hoping the meal will help to show how sorry I am for everything I put her through when I was unwell along with thanking her for pulling me out the other side of it all.
There's so much uncertainty at the moment. Currently waiting for the contracts in order to move house and waiting to find out where my next rotation at work will be. This is all due to happen over the next month. Trying to my best to deal with this by drowning myself in packing and cleaning.
February 8, 2026 at 2:03 PM
There's so much uncertainty at the moment. Currently waiting for the contracts in order to move house and waiting to find out where my next rotation at work will be. This is all due to happen over the next month. Trying to my best to deal with this by drowning myself in packing and cleaning.
Recent months have been particularly challenging and I'd be lying if I said I haven't had urges to engage in old coping mechanisms. However I've somehow managed to ride the storm and the dates on this app look pretty impressive. Time may have allowed me to prove to myself there is a way to regain my
February 7, 2026 at 8:37 PM
Recent months have been particularly challenging and I'd be lying if I said I haven't had urges to engage in old coping mechanisms. However I've somehow managed to ride the storm and the dates on this app look pretty impressive. Time may have allowed me to prove to myself there is a way to regain my
My mum's been unwell in hospital for 5 weeks now. Today I teared up at work for the first time. I've held it together for so long but the reality of the severity of the situation is finally sinking in. My stress is through the roof.
January 21, 2026 at 6:58 PM
My mum's been unwell in hospital for 5 weeks now. Today I teared up at work for the first time. I've held it together for so long but the reality of the severity of the situation is finally sinking in. My stress is through the roof.
I hate it when I get a GP I don't know phone me because I just freeze and can't tell them the truth, particularly when it's mental health related. Not having a good mental health day at all today. It's probably because I'm off work and have lost all routine and purpose.
January 2, 2026 at 2:57 PM
I hate it when I get a GP I don't know phone me because I just freeze and can't tell them the truth, particularly when it's mental health related. Not having a good mental health day at all today. It's probably because I'm off work and have lost all routine and purpose.
My mum's severely unwell and might need emergency surgery. I don't know how to feel. I'm meant to be going to my wife's family for Christmas which I was very excited for but now this is on pause. I'm just praying work will let me do the 150mile trip to see my mum tomorrow.
December 15, 2025 at 7:51 PM
My mum's severely unwell and might need emergency surgery. I don't know how to feel. I'm meant to be going to my wife's family for Christmas which I was very excited for but now this is on pause. I'm just praying work will let me do the 150mile trip to see my mum tomorrow.
I was debating contacting my GP tomorrow as things are tough. Then I received a summary letter from my psych appointment in October which stated "compulsive behaviour in the context of ASD" this has never been highlighted to me before now. I kind of feel if this is the case there's no point
December 10, 2025 at 8:20 PM
I was debating contacting my GP tomorrow as things are tough. Then I received a summary letter from my psych appointment in October which stated "compulsive behaviour in the context of ASD" this has never been highlighted to me before now. I kind of feel if this is the case there's no point
I've had a migraine for the past 24 hours now, which only makes me feel more exhausted than I already am with my horrendous sleep recently.
December 8, 2025 at 6:39 PM
I've had a migraine for the past 24 hours now, which only makes me feel more exhausted than I already am with my horrendous sleep recently.
As the days go on the worse things seem to get. The constant fear that if things aren't a particular way then something bad will happen to my family. E.g. I've just had to move the playstation controller to a particular position to ensure my wife is safe at her Christmas party. Previously it used
December 6, 2025 at 9:21 PM
As the days go on the worse things seem to get. The constant fear that if things aren't a particular way then something bad will happen to my family. E.g. I've just had to move the playstation controller to a particular position to ensure my wife is safe at her Christmas party. Previously it used
Feeling really on edge today. Feels like I've done something wrong, something bad is going to happen and that I've forgotten something really important all combined into one.
December 4, 2025 at 11:33 AM
Feeling really on edge today. Feels like I've done something wrong, something bad is going to happen and that I've forgotten something really important all combined into one.
It's nearly been a month of reducing off label antipsychotics. Sleep is getting more difficult each night and there are some very small signs of a possible relapse showing. Mood remains stable though. I'm probably coming to the end of the main withdrawal stage which is slightly concerning with the
November 30, 2025 at 10:00 AM
It's nearly been a month of reducing off label antipsychotics. Sleep is getting more difficult each night and there are some very small signs of a possible relapse showing. Mood remains stable though. I'm probably coming to the end of the main withdrawal stage which is slightly concerning with the
Off work sick... I feel worried about it as I'm scared I'll get in trouble due to the ridiculous sickness policy of the NHS. However I'm absolutely beyond exhausted and so nauseous that I know deep down my body needs a proper rest.
November 25, 2025 at 8:27 AM
Off work sick... I feel worried about it as I'm scared I'll get in trouble due to the ridiculous sickness policy of the NHS. However I'm absolutely beyond exhausted and so nauseous that I know deep down my body needs a proper rest.
I can't work out whether I'm getting ill, overly tired or it's medication withdrawal. I am having great difficulty with my body temperature, either too cold and can't warm up or I get unbearably hot. My sleep is so messed up, it's difficult to get to sleep and then my sleep is disturbed like
November 19, 2025 at 9:49 PM
I can't work out whether I'm getting ill, overly tired or it's medication withdrawal. I am having great difficulty with my body temperature, either too cold and can't warm up or I get unbearably hot. My sleep is so messed up, it's difficult to get to sleep and then my sleep is disturbed like
I've been moved back onto the extended release version of my antipsychotic. Just in time as I've felt rather emotional today. I just hope it doesn't take too long to adapt back on it. It is still at a lower dose than I was on previously. Currently having mixed feelings about lowering the dose.
November 13, 2025 at 10:28 PM
I've been moved back onto the extended release version of my antipsychotic. Just in time as I've felt rather emotional today. I just hope it doesn't take too long to adapt back on it. It is still at a lower dose than I was on previously. Currently having mixed feelings about lowering the dose.
My pharmacist confirmed today that my prescription is a clerical error however the only way to fix this is to try and get hold of the GP in the morning. In the meantime I remain on the wrong medication 🙄
November 12, 2025 at 7:24 PM
My pharmacist confirmed today that my prescription is a clerical error however the only way to fix this is to try and get hold of the GP in the morning. In the meantime I remain on the wrong medication 🙄
Day 4 of medication change... Sleep deprivation is becoming a problem and nausea has hit this evening. I've still got this feeling of unease/anxiety but again this could just be normal emotions due to a few stressful upcoming events. My body certainly feels lighter to move though.
November 11, 2025 at 5:38 PM
Day 4 of medication change... Sleep deprivation is becoming a problem and nausea has hit this evening. I've still got this feeling of unease/anxiety but again this could just be normal emotions due to a few stressful upcoming events. My body certainly feels lighter to move though.
Day 3 of the change of medication... It's the first day I'm really noticing changes. Sleep is getting worse each night, but it's nice to be wide awake in the morning for work. I've felt tired all day however the tiredness is one I can push through and is less debilitating than antipsychotic fatigue.
November 10, 2025 at 8:51 PM
Day 3 of the change of medication... It's the first day I'm really noticing changes. Sleep is getting worse each night, but it's nice to be wide awake in the morning for work. I've felt tired all day however the tiredness is one I can push through and is less debilitating than antipsychotic fatigue.
Picked up my prescription to find out my antipsychotic has been lowered without anyone telling me. Whilst this should be a celebration instead I'm left full of anxiety because not only has the dose been lowered the type of medication has changed. I was previously on an extended release but now I'm
November 7, 2025 at 10:31 PM
Picked up my prescription to find out my antipsychotic has been lowered without anyone telling me. Whilst this should be a celebration instead I'm left full of anxiety because not only has the dose been lowered the type of medication has changed. I was previously on an extended release but now I'm
My CMHT is actually useless. Quote from the psych today: "if the medication is making you tired in the mornings you probably shouldn't be driving into work." So... They want me to be unemployed?!?
October 23, 2025 at 7:42 PM
My CMHT is actually useless. Quote from the psych today: "if the medication is making you tired in the mornings you probably shouldn't be driving into work." So... They want me to be unemployed?!?
Sat waiting for my CMHT appointment and I feel sick with nerves.
October 23, 2025 at 1:13 PM
Sat waiting for my CMHT appointment and I feel sick with nerves.
I have not felt this emotionally and physically tired in such a long time. I also had the pleasure of experiencing a mini anxiety attack today for the first time in well over a year. In desperate need of a break and some decent sleep
October 8, 2025 at 4:20 PM
I have not felt this emotionally and physically tired in such a long time. I also had the pleasure of experiencing a mini anxiety attack today for the first time in well over a year. In desperate need of a break and some decent sleep
Feeling rather low today. I could feel myself becoming easily stressed again at work today, though I don't believe I showed it. I'm definitely in some sort of burnout. I am easily distracted though which is good. Definitely need a weekend of rest and 0 responsibility
October 3, 2025 at 8:50 PM
Feeling rather low today. I could feel myself becoming easily stressed again at work today, though I don't believe I showed it. I'm definitely in some sort of burnout. I am easily distracted though which is good. Definitely need a weekend of rest and 0 responsibility
When I got this job a year ago the hiring manager tried to reject my job offer just to historic sickness from mental health. Roll on a year and I've had just one sickness due to a gallbladder problem. Since getting this job I've been trying my hardest to prove myself to them. Today however my stress
October 2, 2025 at 7:41 PM
When I got this job a year ago the hiring manager tried to reject my job offer just to historic sickness from mental health. Roll on a year and I've had just one sickness due to a gallbladder problem. Since getting this job I've been trying my hardest to prove myself to them. Today however my stress
Struggling at the moment with intrusive thoughts. I know I've currently been cruising on the edge of burnout for some time now. Struggling to recharge. There's many positives in my life currently so it's not too difficult to challenge the thoughts. I guess it's just a normal experience of recovery.
September 30, 2025 at 6:04 PM
Struggling at the moment with intrusive thoughts. I know I've currently been cruising on the edge of burnout for some time now. Struggling to recharge. There's many positives in my life currently so it's not too difficult to challenge the thoughts. I guess it's just a normal experience of recovery.
Having a formal autism diagnosis is bittersweet. On one hand I've gained a deeper understanding of my strengths and challenges and I can support myself better. On the other hand I'm more aware of my challenges resulting in more self hatred, overcompensating and masking.
September 29, 2025 at 9:17 PM
Having a formal autism diagnosis is bittersweet. On one hand I've gained a deeper understanding of my strengths and challenges and I can support myself better. On the other hand I'm more aware of my challenges resulting in more self hatred, overcompensating and masking.