Garftato Head
@johnymortis.bsky.social
Posting through the apocalypse
Charlie's Browns and The Great Blumpkin
January 29, 2026 at 7:03 AM
Charlie's Browns and The Great Blumpkin
Reposted by Garftato Head
Just got out of jail. Do your taxes guys.
HAHA YEA RIGHT!!! FUCK TAXES!!!
HAHA YEA RIGHT!!! FUCK TAXES!!!
January 28, 2026 at 6:20 PM
Just got out of jail. Do your taxes guys.
HAHA YEA RIGHT!!! FUCK TAXES!!!
HAHA YEA RIGHT!!! FUCK TAXES!!!
I have bad news, I have to have a bong hit transplant, or I'll die. Pray for me
January 19, 2026 at 1:07 AM
I have bad news, I have to have a bong hit transplant, or I'll die. Pray for me
Did you all know that they made a movie based on the N64 game GoldenEye?
January 15, 2026 at 5:43 AM
Did you all know that they made a movie based on the N64 game GoldenEye?
I have come here to kill God and fuck lasagna. And I'm all out of lasagna.
January 8, 2026 at 2:25 AM
I have come here to kill God and fuck lasagna. And I'm all out of lasagna.
Fullmetal Jelqchemist
January 8, 2026 at 2:21 AM
Fullmetal Jelqchemist
Capitan Picard stands in the darkened, inactive holodeck. "Computer: load program BigJB21." In a flash of light a giant 20th century bedroom bursts into view. An enormous Beverly Crusher in a blue dress sits on a bed, extending her abnormally long arms. 1/2
December 20, 2025 at 10:21 PM
Capitan Picard stands in the darkened, inactive holodeck. "Computer: load program BigJB21." In a flash of light a giant 20th century bedroom bursts into view. An enormous Beverly Crusher in a blue dress sits on a bed, extending her abnormally long arms. 1/2
I'm an Anarcho-fuckyorselfist
December 19, 2025 at 4:11 AM
I'm an Anarcho-fuckyorselfist
4283 AD: Aliens from a distant solar system pick up a signal from one of the zillions of Von Neumann style probes they sent across the galaxy. They instantaneously arrive to our barren, lifeless world, only picking up traces of carbon and dust with their instruments.
December 12, 2025 at 4:48 AM
4283 AD: Aliens from a distant solar system pick up a signal from one of the zillions of Von Neumann style probes they sent across the galaxy. They instantaneously arrive to our barren, lifeless world, only picking up traces of carbon and dust with their instruments.
You know Belle was disappointed on some level when the Beast changed back because his junk must have shrank. Plus she was a white woman
November 30, 2025 at 4:22 AM
You know Belle was disappointed on some level when the Beast changed back because his junk must have shrank. Plus she was a white woman
That bitch is a homunculus I can tell her pussy smell like alchemy
November 26, 2025 at 3:19 AM
That bitch is a homunculus I can tell her pussy smell like alchemy
Getting Earth kicked out of the intergalactic council by screaming "Bald!" at the grey alien ambassador when they make first contact.
November 14, 2025 at 4:11 AM
Getting Earth kicked out of the intergalactic council by screaming "Bald!" at the grey alien ambassador when they make first contact.
Whoever invented Samosas is a good fuckeing person
November 2, 2025 at 2:54 AM
Whoever invented Samosas is a good fuckeing person
*random person coming up to Mary at the crucifixion* "Don't worry, we'll make a holiday out of this."
November 2, 2025 at 2:53 AM
*random person coming up to Mary at the crucifixion* "Don't worry, we'll make a holiday out of this."
Reposted by Garftato Head
i want to shit in that trash can and make garf watch
October 22, 2025 at 4:51 PM
i want to shit in that trash can and make garf watch
You sacrifice enough you can be a part of the system it's just less you being a compassionate industrialist Lord and more like a single body merging into a giant mound of flesh and steel and cybernetics that seeks to deterritorialize all of physical reality and eventually the noosphere itself
September 16, 2025 at 8:12 PM
You sacrifice enough you can be a part of the system it's just less you being a compassionate industrialist Lord and more like a single body merging into a giant mound of flesh and steel and cybernetics that seeks to deterritorialize all of physical reality and eventually the noosphere itself
This shit ain't nothing to me man
I drank the hemlock that killed Socrates and told them to give me another
I toppled Pato's Republic with a dictatorship of the people
I told Aristotle that I was both virtuous and given to vice
I told Diogenes he was my dawg
This shit ain't nothing to me
I drank the hemlock that killed Socrates and told them to give me another
I toppled Pato's Republic with a dictatorship of the people
I told Aristotle that I was both virtuous and given to vice
I told Diogenes he was my dawg
This shit ain't nothing to me
August 30, 2025 at 5:54 AM
This shit ain't nothing to me man
I drank the hemlock that killed Socrates and told them to give me another
I toppled Pato's Republic with a dictatorship of the people
I told Aristotle that I was both virtuous and given to vice
I told Diogenes he was my dawg
This shit ain't nothing to me
I drank the hemlock that killed Socrates and told them to give me another
I toppled Pato's Republic with a dictatorship of the people
I told Aristotle that I was both virtuous and given to vice
I told Diogenes he was my dawg
This shit ain't nothing to me
Yo someone deleted @jabronimike.bsky.social 's face
August 18, 2025 at 8:01 PM
Yo someone deleted @jabronimike.bsky.social 's face
"We should go back to dressing in suits! This is why the west has fallen!" I type while wearing my 4XL Punisher American flag t-shirt, cargo shorts and crocks.
August 18, 2025 at 7:59 PM
"We should go back to dressing in suits! This is why the west has fallen!" I type while wearing my 4XL Punisher American flag t-shirt, cargo shorts and crocks.
"All right I take it all back, technology is the shit industrialism all the way" Ted Kaczynski after seeing Judy Hopps porn
August 9, 2025 at 11:53 PM
"All right I take it all back, technology is the shit industrialism all the way" Ted Kaczynski after seeing Judy Hopps porn
"There's nothing in the rule book about a dog not being able to play basketball" yeah I'm pretty sure there's nothing in there about a kid bringing an AK onto the court and wasting the opposing team but I'm pretty sure we don't allow that
August 9, 2025 at 2:55 AM
"There's nothing in the rule book about a dog not being able to play basketball" yeah I'm pretty sure there's nothing in there about a kid bringing an AK onto the court and wasting the opposing team but I'm pretty sure we don't allow that
I'm a zoomer, I'm a doomer, I'm a midnight gooner
August 5, 2025 at 6:46 PM
I'm a zoomer, I'm a doomer, I'm a midnight gooner
I'm on that Steve Harvey fentanyl
July 15, 2025 at 3:11 PM
I'm on that Steve Harvey fentanyl
