Joel Dane
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joeldane.bsky.social
Joel Dane
@joeldane.bsky.social
190 followers 170 following 560 posts
Author of CRY PILOT trilogy (Ace Books), Marigold Breach audio drama (with Jameela Jamil!), RAGPICKER (Meerkat Press, my passion project) and various other long-form lies under various other short-form pen names.
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joeldane.bsky.social
I never used AI before but I wondered if it could decrypt the coded language (so obviously not natural) in the birthday card.
Grok and ChatGPT Decode the Birthday Card: "There must be more to life than having everything." o The word having here replaces another verb or another meaning of having. o Context suggests having refers to sexual intercourse or activity. "Yes, there is, but I won’t tell you what it is." "Nor will I, since I also know what it is." o Mutual agreement to maintain a secret. o Collusion or fellowship in taboo or shameful activities. "We have certain things in common, Jeffrey." "Yes, we do, come to think of it." o A spiritual/psychological kinship. o A specific, probably-prohibited sexualized appetite. "Enigmas never age, have you noticed that?" "As a matter of fact, it was clear to me the last time I saw you." o Enigmas refers to the literal embodiments of aforementioned secrets, in this case sexual partners or victims. o Despite the passage of time, the Enigmas must remain the same age. o Clear matters of fact reveals an awareness of shameful or criminal behavior. o The last time I saw you implies and enforces complicity in established agreement. "A pal is a wonderful thing. Happy Birthday — and may every day be another wonderful secret." o Using wonderful to modify both pal and secret unites those words. o The secret, as established, is sexual contact with inappropriate persons, hence every day indicates scheduling meetings or placing a repeating order.
July 18, 2025 at 3:21 AM
joeldane.bsky.social
r12.fodey.com/2889/73ecadf...
May 21, 2025 at 6:40 PM
joeldane.bsky.social
A riff on the Onion parody Why Do All These Homosexuals Keep Sucking My Cock: Why Do All These Nazis Keep Goose Stepping Into My Party. Look, I’m not a hateful person or anything—I believe we should all live and let live. But lately, I’ve been having a real problem with these Nazis. You see, just about wherever I go these days, one of them appears in my podcast, conference, or search history. Take last Sunday, for instance when I casually invited a cerebral guy I met at CPAC to explain his approach to politics. Nothing fascist-y, just a couple of conservatives who despise antifa and have been shouting about drowning the US government in a bathtub for decades. The guy looked super MAGA. He told me he loves tiki torches, but hates thugs and international bankers. I mean, who doesn’t? A real salt-of-the-earth guy. One minute we’re agreeing that two seig heils are no big deal then out of nowhere he
April 28, 2025 at 8:12 PM
joeldane.bsky.social
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If 350 rabbis condemn Trump will people pretend they didn’t?
March 31, 2025 at 9:39 PM
joeldane.bsky.social
This is a huge secret, please don’t mention it publicly but it’s possible that I’m one half of Jo Nichols so if you’re looking for a fun, warm, charming, 50%-brilliant mystery to read in like August PREORDER NOW!
February 6, 2025 at 9:05 PM
joeldane.bsky.social
I refuse to Like this for numerological reasons, but chag sameach!
18 likes. Good vibes, bubuleh.
December 25, 2024 at 7:31 PM
joeldane.bsky.social
We’re here to talk about your daughter’s menarche.

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JV Vance and his vancepantsers on a runway in front of VP Harris’s plane, which they just finished sniffing.
August 9, 2024 at 10:36 PM
joeldane.bsky.social
Only a high-powered attorney with a heart of gold can help Santa after bullies steal his beard.
August 6, 2024 at 3:32 PM
joeldane.bsky.social
TFW you've published a couple dozen novels, but suddenly, decades into the game, you write a beloved weirdo Passion Project and all the years of callouses and cynicism get torn away and you'll like, Hey look a cover please love this ...
meerkatpress.com/cover-reveal...
A book cover with the letters representing the title, THE RAGPICKER, depicted in glorious lampstack disarray it's my new book I'm so happy.
November 8, 2023 at 11:32 PM