He’s gonna send Dragstrip and Dead End to the Upside Down if they don’t behave.

I was equally put off with the evil hand orifices

Hasbro China, and exclusively them.

Also might be the fact that he signed it

Industry Plant Pokémon

This shit plays out like Madlibs.
“My singleplayer Minecraft world is haunted by… my dead/missing friend.
Eventually the game glitches by… giving me items that aren’t in the game yet.
This is because… the government.”

Ditto hitting the “Mama I’m chasing a ghost, do I look like him?”