James Parsnips
@jamesparsnips.bsky.social
Quiet single man moving to Devon. BA (Hons) in Communication. Hate Reform UK. I like to chat and make new friends where I can. Keep it light, people.
Zangi 68-4031-9580
Telegram @shortjamesparsnips
Zangi 68-4031-9580
Telegram @shortjamesparsnips
Pinned
James Parsnips
@jamesparsnips.bsky.social
· Jul 17
A lovely young lady on the bus just told me I have a "sick beard". I have rarely felt so insulted.
I don't know why today of all days, perhaps it was hearing Kajagoogoo on the radio, but I'm regretting giving up the Trumpet after Grade 3.
December 10, 2025 at 3:50 PM
I don't know why today of all days, perhaps it was hearing Kajagoogoo on the radio, but I'm regretting giving up the Trumpet after Grade 3.
Travellers want to spend less time in airports, not more. I'm fairly confident in saying that most people prioritise shorter waiting times and flights running on time over having somewhere to do FUCKING PULL-UPS.
These are not serious people.
These are not serious people.
Duffy on what he's doing to improve the airport experience for travelers: "Maybe I want a workout area where people might get some blood flowing doing some pull ups or step ups in the airport."
December 9, 2025 at 1:48 PM
Travellers want to spend less time in airports, not more. I'm fairly confident in saying that most people prioritise shorter waiting times and flights running on time over having somewhere to do FUCKING PULL-UPS.
These are not serious people.
These are not serious people.
I got a letter from Nigel Farage / Reform UK the other day. Typical fearmongering about mobile phone thefts, the Mayor of London, "lawless" Britain and a promise to change things to protect "hard working people". Like the #maga movement it's a campaign of fear and hate, nothing but negativity.
December 9, 2025 at 1:26 PM
I got a letter from Nigel Farage / Reform UK the other day. Typical fearmongering about mobile phone thefts, the Mayor of London, "lawless" Britain and a promise to change things to protect "hard working people". Like the #maga movement it's a campaign of fear and hate, nothing but negativity.
This happens a lot to me here. Conversational impotency. Perhaps I should be less polite/not give them the benefit of the doubt when I get unsolicited messages like this? I hate that even on Bluesky I feel like my guard needs to be up most of the time.
December 8, 2025 at 11:45 AM
This happens a lot to me here. Conversational impotency. Perhaps I should be less polite/not give them the benefit of the doubt when I get unsolicited messages like this? I hate that even on Bluesky I feel like my guard needs to be up most of the time.
It's a pretty sweet feeling when the hottest lady you know announces you're her online crush. Luv ya @missmarceautrans.bsky.social, just the loveliest xxx
F it I’m gonna say it anyways. @jamesparsnips.bsky.social is my crush.. more men need to be like him.
Kind, caring , can hold a real conversation and see’s for the woman I am .
Kind, caring , can hold a real conversation and see’s for the woman I am .
December 7, 2025 at 8:42 PM
It's a pretty sweet feeling when the hottest lady you know announces you're her online crush. Luv ya @missmarceautrans.bsky.social, just the loveliest xxx
My house looks weird. Apart from the essentials, it's basically empty. I have never seen it like this, so bare. It no longer feels like my home.
Am I feeling melancholy? I don't regret my decision to move at all, this hasn't been a family home since Dad left and I've been here a lot longer...
Am I feeling melancholy? I don't regret my decision to move at all, this hasn't been a family home since Dad left and I've been here a lot longer...
December 7, 2025 at 3:05 PM
My house looks weird. Apart from the essentials, it's basically empty. I have never seen it like this, so bare. It no longer feels like my home.
Am I feeling melancholy? I don't regret my decision to move at all, this hasn't been a family home since Dad left and I've been here a lot longer...
Am I feeling melancholy? I don't regret my decision to move at all, this hasn't been a family home since Dad left and I've been here a lot longer...
While clearing out today I found this old photo from 15 years ago, the last time I was asked to be the Village Hall "Real Father Christmas". They used to paint my beard white... wouldn't be any need for that now.
So, who wants to come and sit on Santa's lap and have their photo taken with him??!!
So, who wants to come and sit on Santa's lap and have their photo taken with him??!!
December 6, 2025 at 8:33 PM
While clearing out today I found this old photo from 15 years ago, the last time I was asked to be the Village Hall "Real Father Christmas". They used to paint my beard white... wouldn't be any need for that now.
So, who wants to come and sit on Santa's lap and have their photo taken with him??!!
So, who wants to come and sit on Santa's lap and have their photo taken with him??!!
Reposted by James Parsnips
I mean....if being a child rapist destroys a presidency, then maybe, JUST maybe the guy shouldn't be president. Also, FUCK Ben Shapiro. Fucking whiny ass pansy bitch.
December 6, 2025 at 5:18 PM
I mean....if being a child rapist destroys a presidency, then maybe, JUST maybe the guy shouldn't be president. Also, FUCK Ben Shapiro. Fucking whiny ass pansy bitch.
I'm back home & starting the final clear-out. A skip arrived yesterday so the last of my junk is going in that. Started in the loft this morning & found a huge box of VHS tapes from the late 80s and early 90s. One is marked "Joanne and me 14/04/89" and is our attempt at making a sex tape...
December 6, 2025 at 10:23 AM
I'm back home & starting the final clear-out. A skip arrived yesterday so the last of my junk is going in that. Started in the loft this morning & found a huge box of VHS tapes from the late 80s and early 90s. One is marked "Joanne and me 14/04/89" and is our attempt at making a sex tape...
I saw Donald Trump got a "peace" medal from #FIFA yesterday, a made-up award that didn't exist until it was given to him and has no substance or reverence.
Looked like something wealthy parents do for terminally ill kids to make them feel special before they die, like meeting The Rock or something.
Looked like something wealthy parents do for terminally ill kids to make them feel special before they die, like meeting The Rock or something.
December 6, 2025 at 10:05 AM
I saw Donald Trump got a "peace" medal from #FIFA yesterday, a made-up award that didn't exist until it was given to him and has no substance or reverence.
Looked like something wealthy parents do for terminally ill kids to make them feel special before they die, like meeting The Rock or something.
Looked like something wealthy parents do for terminally ill kids to make them feel special before they die, like meeting The Rock or something.
I am a grown arse man with no desire to live to 100, or even 75, so if I want banana bread with chocolate bits for breakfast I will have banana bread with chocolate bits for breakfast and there's nothing you or anyone else can do to stop me.
December 6, 2025 at 9:53 AM
I am a grown arse man with no desire to live to 100, or even 75, so if I want banana bread with chocolate bits for breakfast I will have banana bread with chocolate bits for breakfast and there's nothing you or anyone else can do to stop me.
Sat outside a café in Devon (with outdoor heaters) & 2 old blokes with dogs meet up. The dogs clearly know each other and start playing. One of the blokes says "come here, fucker" to his dog. I thought that was harsh until it became clear that's actually the dog's name.
I'm gonna love it here.
I'm gonna love it here.
December 3, 2025 at 2:01 PM
Sat outside a café in Devon (with outdoor heaters) & 2 old blokes with dogs meet up. The dogs clearly know each other and start playing. One of the blokes says "come here, fucker" to his dog. I thought that was harsh until it became clear that's actually the dog's name.
I'm gonna love it here.
I'm gonna love it here.
This is not the way to clear the backlog of court cases. The obvious way is to have more hearings in more courts, find more jurors and make sure there are enough qualified judges. This is some bullshit.
If you want due process you need to at least kill someone in addition to your petty crime.
Jury trials scrapped for crimes with sentences of less than three years
December 2, 2025 at 3:46 PM
This is not the way to clear the backlog of court cases. The obvious way is to have more hearings in more courts, find more jurors and make sure there are enough qualified judges. This is some bullshit.
A lesson for many - be nice/good to people when you meet them and they will probably like you, no matter who you are or how you look, as my friend Amy has proven here. Thank you!
@jamesparsnips.bsky.social you are the sweetest man ever and this kiss is just for you hunni 💋
December 2, 2025 at 3:40 PM
A lesson for many - be nice/good to people when you meet them and they will probably like you, no matter who you are or how you look, as my friend Amy has proven here. Thank you!
Reposted by James Parsnips
Shit sandwich.
December 2, 2025 at 1:22 PM
Shit sandwich.
Keep trying out these photo improvement apps to iron out my wrinkles and the obvious signs of age. I think we can all conclude they don't work.
I'm old now. Fuck it.
I'm old now. Fuck it.
November 29, 2025 at 6:10 PM
Keep trying out these photo improvement apps to iron out my wrinkles and the obvious signs of age. I think we can all conclude they don't work.
I'm old now. Fuck it.
I'm old now. Fuck it.
Reposted by James Parsnips
It seems like every nation on the planet is becoming increasingly paranoid about immigration and it’s a VERY THINLY VEILED excuse to impose racist and bigoted policies.
November 28, 2025 at 6:56 PM
It seems like every nation on the planet is becoming increasingly paranoid about immigration and it’s a VERY THINLY VEILED excuse to impose racist and bigoted policies.
I think I've done pretty well that it's taken until November 28th for me to hear a Christmas song: note, it was "Christmas In Hollis" and someone had just started watching Die Hard on their little gaming handheld thing on the bus and they didn't have headphones on. Highway to hell from here on in...
November 28, 2025 at 2:21 PM
I think I've done pretty well that it's taken until November 28th for me to hear a Christmas song: note, it was "Christmas In Hollis" and someone had just started watching Die Hard on their little gaming handheld thing on the bus and they didn't have headphones on. Highway to hell from here on in...
The south coast in November is not the best location in the world for getting a winter tan, but I do love to be beside the seaside no matter the weather.
Sadly, I was only there to pay my last respects to a very old friend who fought and beat cancer 3 times out of the 4 she got it. R.I.P, Jane.
Sadly, I was only there to pay my last respects to a very old friend who fought and beat cancer 3 times out of the 4 she got it. R.I.P, Jane.
November 28, 2025 at 10:55 AM
The south coast in November is not the best location in the world for getting a winter tan, but I do love to be beside the seaside no matter the weather.
Sadly, I was only there to pay my last respects to a very old friend who fought and beat cancer 3 times out of the 4 she got it. R.I.P, Jane.
Sadly, I was only there to pay my last respects to a very old friend who fought and beat cancer 3 times out of the 4 she got it. R.I.P, Jane.
Now look, I know that I am not a handsome man. I am fine with that and I'm even fine when ladies take the piss out of me about my looks as I'm fully aware of how I come across to people, but at least give me the chance to correct you, yeh?
November 27, 2025 at 9:38 PM
Now look, I know that I am not a handsome man. I am fine with that and I'm even fine when ladies take the piss out of me about my looks as I'm fully aware of how I come across to people, but at least give me the chance to correct you, yeh?
Reposted by James Parsnips
Happy Friendsgiving, Skeethearts ☀️🩷☕️💕
November 27, 2025 at 2:44 PM
Happy Friendsgiving, Skeethearts ☀️🩷☕️💕
Hello all! I'm back, what did I miss?
November 27, 2025 at 6:12 PM
Hello all! I'm back, what did I miss?
And likewise, anyone who dares to have a go at @missmarceautrans.bsky.social, who is an absolute delight, will find my words are some way away from kind.
Be warned anyone who disrespects my friend @jamesparsnips.bsky.social has to deal with me . He is such a gentleman who always treats me with respect.
November 27, 2025 at 6:09 PM
And likewise, anyone who dares to have a go at @missmarceautrans.bsky.social, who is an absolute delight, will find my words are some way away from kind.