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hjelfman.com
hazel ❤️‍🔥
@hjelfman.com
fix your hearts or die ❤️‍🔥
RSVP to picnic | Partiful
picnic potluck (???)
partiful.com
November 25, 2024 at 2:34 PM
still kicking
September 16, 2024 at 10:20 PM
we’re so back
August 31, 2023 at 5:37 PM
my genetic predisposition to schizophrenia on my shoulder: i think you should start smoking weed again

the concept of bipolar ii on my other shoulder: amphetamines wouldn’t be so bad

the spirit of caitlin jenner in my passenger seat: would you like another beer sir?
July 24, 2023 at 4:02 PM
we’re so back
July 24, 2023 at 4:01 PM
reminder that “””boymoding””” does not work
July 7, 2023 at 1:34 AM
so true bestie
July 1, 2023 at 9:51 PM
so true bestie
July 1, 2023 at 9:50 PM
Reposted by hazel ❤️‍🔥
All men are bi you just have to figure out if it’s sexual or goted
June 24, 2023 at 4:23 PM
as a former cis person i think i have the pass
June 21, 2023 at 1:15 PM
i need to match with her
June 21, 2023 at 1:14 PM
this has legit been the worst week of my life unfortunately
- daily panic attacks
- can’t get to psychiatrist
- partner of six years and i broke up
- flight to dallas cancelled so i am stuck in denver

thank you john green’s anthropocene reviewed you have gotten me through this
June 17, 2023 at 3:23 PM
“picking up a ticket for (last name)”
*looks through the tickets (under legal names) multiple times*
“what’s your first name??”
June 17, 2023 at 2:29 AM
hm i’ve kinda realized that my atheism is unfounded
June 11, 2023 at 12:57 AM
June 10, 2023 at 9:09 PM
posting my more controversial opinions away from twitter: i do not know how to distinguish altered mental states and religious experiences, and that tends to tilt me in favor of religion rather than science
June 10, 2023 at 4:13 AM
June 10, 2023 at 4:12 AM
is bpd genetic
June 3, 2023 at 3:51 PM
idk what changed but i’ve gone up a cup size in a month
June 2, 2023 at 11:36 PM
Reposted by hazel ❤️‍🔥
certified hazel moment
June 2, 2023 at 11:34 PM
bluesky exclusive selfie angle
June 2, 2023 at 11:32 PM
women don’t exist, actually
May 9, 2023 at 1:45 PM
Reposted by hazel ❤️‍🔥
SIMULATED POST BY @hjelfman.com: pleasure is when your body says “fuck you” to your mind
May 5, 2023 at 5:22 PM
Reposted by hazel ❤️‍🔥
breadmaxxing. on my yeastcel arc. in my flour era. I'm going whole grain mode, on that milling grindset
April 28, 2023 at 2:44 PM