Gordon Highland
@gordonhighland.com
Director, musician, author, purveyor of fine jokes and aphorisms
http://gordonhighland.com
http://gordonhighland.com
When someone doesn't show up for their shift:
December 7, 2025 at 2:07 AM
When someone doesn't show up for their shift:
It's no closet, but a few more top-shelf shelves might complete me.
November 15, 2025 at 2:31 AM
It's no closet, but a few more top-shelf shelves might complete me.
No wonder it's been so tough to keep that drum throne occupied.
July 23, 2025 at 9:39 PM
No wonder it's been so tough to keep that drum throne occupied.
Enjoy this sinister little piano mashup. 🎧
July 8, 2025 at 3:15 PM
Enjoy this sinister little piano mashup. 🎧
That's odd.
I figured we were still riffing on her cry face.
I figured we were still riffing on her cry face.
June 20, 2025 at 4:41 PM
That's odd.
I figured we were still riffing on her cry face.
I figured we were still riffing on her cry face.
Not understanding cows versus bulls, I bet many kids assumed glue was produced by squeezing Elmer's udders, like the bottle.
His wife was Elsie the Borden's dairy cow. Seriously. They appeared in domestic ads and comics together.
His wife was Elsie the Borden's dairy cow. Seriously. They appeared in domestic ads and comics together.
June 13, 2025 at 12:44 PM
Not understanding cows versus bulls, I bet many kids assumed glue was produced by squeezing Elmer's udders, like the bottle.
His wife was Elsie the Borden's dairy cow. Seriously. They appeared in domestic ads and comics together.
His wife was Elsie the Borden's dairy cow. Seriously. They appeared in domestic ads and comics together.
I was so much smarter in 1984.
May 22, 2025 at 10:48 PM
I was so much smarter in 1984.
Correct, 'tis the perineum. 'Taint the front door and 'taint the back, but the middle, as this homebuilder will discover, as well as the woman lifting the ball.
May 4, 2025 at 7:18 PM
Correct, 'tis the perineum. 'Taint the front door and 'taint the back, but the middle, as this homebuilder will discover, as well as the woman lifting the ball.
I often wondered who would choose this so-called flavor … and then I ran out of sweets.
May 4, 2025 at 1:07 PM
I often wondered who would choose this so-called flavor … and then I ran out of sweets.
My favorite out-of-context clip in the history of television. I can't bring myself to @ my personal astrophysicist.
May 2, 2025 at 1:14 AM
My favorite out-of-context clip in the history of television. I can't bring myself to @ my personal astrophysicist.
Maybe he just needs an editor to remove all those adjectives and adverbs and sarcasm.
April 20, 2025 at 4:42 PM
Maybe he just needs an editor to remove all those adjectives and adverbs and sarcasm.
If it looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then it probably is a duck.
April 20, 2025 at 7:37 AM
If it looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then it probably is a duck.
My blurry brother's on the left of your Netflix carousel.
Sharing a womb makes my Bacon Number 3.
Sharing a womb makes my Bacon Number 3.
April 15, 2025 at 4:44 PM
My blurry brother's on the left of your Netflix carousel.
Sharing a womb makes my Bacon Number 3.
Sharing a womb makes my Bacon Number 3.
Used to be one in my back yard, but their kitchen smells were so incompatible that the persistent redolence of mop water was preferable. Now it's just a KenTaco, having amputated the Hut.
April 1, 2025 at 6:55 AM
Used to be one in my back yard, but their kitchen smells were so incompatible that the persistent redolence of mop water was preferable. Now it's just a KenTaco, having amputated the Hut.
Mini version, which I call Chiffles™
March 25, 2025 at 12:10 AM
Mini version, which I call Chiffles™
Looks like Doc set the DeLorean to 1885 again. I hope the flux capacitor runs on high-fructose corn syrup.
March 15, 2025 at 1:24 PM
Looks like Doc set the DeLorean to 1885 again. I hope the flux capacitor runs on high-fructose corn syrup.
Spinning that splatter by @jmh.bsky.social and Bucket, mixed and mastered right here.
March 12, 2025 at 10:12 PM
Spinning that splatter by @jmh.bsky.social and Bucket, mixed and mastered right here.
