I love doing Christmas crafts, me. Makes feel all warm and fuzzy on t’inside.
I facilitate craft groups all over local community, or at least I think I do!
Here’s a photo I took of a Christmas tree decoration which I made meself and totally didn’t pilfer from a local supermarket.
Proper CrimBo!! 🔥👌🔥

I’m a witch, me. A good witch. A lightworker.
A turbocharged one! When I let one rip and spark up a cigarette lighter I can light the whole room up for ages!
I’m a torch, of the Blow variety. A BLOWtorch!! See what I did there?
Proper bo!!
#Witch #Witchcraft #GoodWitch #Lightworker #HumanBlowtorch

Well… Time I shared a selfie.
This is me at Halloween, 10 year ago.
Don’t I make a bloody brilliant ghost?
This is the real deal. Knitted the blanket meself, ectoplasm everywhere!!
Proper bo!!
#Selfie #Halloween2015 #GhostyWoast #LGBTQGhost #Wooo #GhostWithTheMost #MetrosexualGhost #CasperCanFuckOff

By the way, I’m still not happy with that bloody Avid Merrion. When he created that Mel B character for Bo! Selecta’, it were me who he based it on!! That weren’t Mel B, that were Mel ME!
Ooooooooooo! I’ll become Scary Spice when I see him alright!
All these years later, I could still crush a grape!

In a world of seagulls, just think of me as a seagull with a cork up its arse.
That’s me! Proper classy bird!
One too many and I go farty pops.

That’s what I call a bangin night out!

Now to go home and annoy Bert. Hope he’s not wearing his gas mask!
#Fart #Parp #Flatulating #Honker101 #Expert

*BRRRRRAAA-AAAAAAAA-AAAA—AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPP*

There we go, that feels much better. Proper gassy that Tennent’s stuff is! Especially after 10 pints.

Time to head home and change me knickers now.

That were proper bo!!

#NightOut #RateOfInflation

I love skydiving, me. I use me knickers as a parachute. I just need to make sure I’m wearing a new pair which I haven’t farted any holes in yet.
I’m told it helps with the wind resistance, see.
A different kind of wind though!!

See what I did there…? Farting… Wind…
Proper bo!!! 😂😂😂😂
#Skydiving #Win

Not to mention that I manage to out-fart Bert every single time! Don’t get me wrong, he’s a right windbag too. But he’s no match for his big sis! I have a 100% unbeaten record and a whole drawer full of frilly parachute knickers with holes blown in em!!
Watch out Ozone Layer!
#GuffGaff #Parp #Boom

I have a grand constitution, me. Think I inherited it from me Dad, Phyllis, and me Grandpop Mildred before him.
We don’t mess around, us lot! Proper turbocharged when we let one go!
Me dad taught me how to fart the first 3 notes of Smoke On The Water. I started to do it better than him!
Proper bo!!!

Baked beans are bloody brilliant!!
One time I had 16 cans of beans in a single day. I had a Volcanic Explosivity Index for the next two weeks.
It were proper bo, I tell thee!
#BakedBeans #FoodOfLife

I just made some tea, me own special recipe.
Fancy a brew anyone?

Ow do, BlueSky? That’s me all signed up an that.
Now to make a whacking great splash, just like I used to 50 year ago when I jumped in them puddles!
(Me brother Bert still remembers, don’t think he’s forgiven me yet! One time I gave him Legionnaires Disease!)
I’ll make some bloody great arty posts!!