I don't celebrate thanksgiving, but man i really need to stuff a turkey

quick! someone grab my turkey baster!

okay I'm all out of sex puns for the day

it's been too long since i was in the middle of a woman's ass sandwich or women's tits sandwich.

This would fix me.

the problem with this thing is that it's not really big enough for me and it's ice cold unless I warm it up.

By the time it's warm enough and I can get it in and the cold won't deflate it, I'm already close.

then i get it in this thing and it's so amazing i cum right away

the skircle of the day has a penis in it and for some reason this cracks me up

these meds I'm temporarily on make me ultra horny AND make it hard to get hard :-( I have been struggling for the past few days to find good angles while fully hard and I still haven't succeeded.

(blurred background for anonymity because I got creepers)

my account is obviously NSFW. Another NSFW account liked one of my posts, so I looked at their account, liked the posts that I like, and followed them, and then they blocked me.

Does this seem stupid to anyone else?

I'm gonna petition to get them added to a scammers list

cute

I have been so under the weather lately. Too tired for hornyness! 😣 (my illness is chronic but my penis is iconic? idk don't @ me I'm just being silly) This is me with a tummy ache btw if you even care