False Milk Bun
LightNews LightNews
banner
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
False Milk Bun
@falsemilkbun.bsky.social
78 followers 54 following 2.4K posts
18+ Please | Dungeon Meshi posting | KBMS fanfic writer | some kind of waifu guy | Call me Falsie or 39/Miku | If you're blocked it's probably landmine business, not you being History's Greatest Monster
Posts Replies Media Videos
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
pretty sure it's that big head from Zardoz tweeting such things h
September 10, 2025 at 8:11 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
Absolutely wild way to pass away if his final words wind up being (I think) "-now we're not counting GANG violence-" before he is dispatched from afar.
September 10, 2025 at 8:06 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
August 14, 2025 at 10:13 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
you mean the pictures on my computer?
July 4, 2025 at 3:45 AM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
The cheapest one is $580. DELUUUUSIONAL.
June 27, 2025 at 12:26 AM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
I have crawled out of the book mines to update my #kabumisu fantasy novel AU. Rejoice.
Latest Chapter: archiveofourown.org/works/602553...

First chapter: archiveofourown.org/works/602553...
Winter Sun and the Storm-Black Sea by falsemilkbun Summary: Late March, 514 - Kabru, a young half-elf recovered from the Western Continent and adopted into the House of Tol, has managed to secure one of his longest-held ambitions: An appointment with a Dungeon Investigation Unit. Though his age and ignoble blood limit him to service as a page to the squad's enigmatic captain, he's determined to make the most out of what he believes is his best opportunity to help prevent the tragedy that continues to haunt him from recurring. He expects to win his new comrades over in time, his mother expects him to come flying home when faced with boredom and danger. No one expects the little island to which they've deployed to be boiling over with monsters by the time they arrive. But that's what's happened.
June 26, 2025 at 4:33 AM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
June 8, 2025 at 2:33 AM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
wishing you a very BITE EACH OTHER'S DICKS OFF
June 5, 2025 at 8:24 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
the live gag dub has to do like Retsupurae did the yellow reveal in I Have No Mouth or this is gonna be a shitshow
May 21, 2025 at 1:35 AM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
May 20, 2025 at 8:35 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
Can’t wait to hear half a dozen Improv Guys stampede each other trying to be funny over this
May 3, 2025 at 11:44 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
May has just arrived and I already have 5 fics in progress for the kabumisu event that starts on the 12th (Mithrun's birthday) and goes to the 28th (Kabru's birthday) www.tumblr.com/falsemilkbun...
May 3, 2025 at 5:53 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
ohhh! hands~
holding
hands
holding!

YYYIIIP YIPYIPYIPYIPYIP!

UH HUH UH HUH
May 1, 2025 at 2:59 AM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
April 24, 2025 at 12:58 AM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
April 23, 2025 at 12:52 AM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
uwowuwuo bbaby
A manga panel of Kabru from Dungeon Meshi looking cute and sleepy, which has driven the poster to madness
April 9, 2025 at 12:39 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
Broke: Referring to writing whump fanfic as 'putting my boy in the pear wiggler'

Awoke: TIME TO GET IN THE
April 7, 2025 at 11:17 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
Updated my Canary Kabru AU, Winter Sun and the Storm-Black Sea, with a succubus encounter.
#kabumisu
First chapter: archiveofourown.org/works/602553...
Latest chapter (15): archiveofourown.org/works/602553...
Succubi, he knew, lured and trapped their prey by exploiting their base desires. A man unhappily married might be ensnared by the vision not of his wife but of a carefree young lover, whether he acknowledged his unhappiness to himself or not. Kabru’s bedrock unfulfilled desire was not a grown man’s desire, though. It was a child’s. What had he remembered of his mother, really? A scream, the arms that held him, and the foggy impression of a woman’s face. To be faced with the deterioration of his memory was a nightmare that had him babbling and bawling on the floor, the heels of his boots scrabbling futilely against the stones as he struggled to funnel energy from his pounding heart into his extremities. He was incoherent with panic. He had forgotten her, and he had never even allowed himself to realize. The smeary outlines of the mouth that had kissed and sang to him chanted some short, soundless mantra. Time had stolen even her voice from him. Or had he given it up? Hadn’t he folded eventually and let himself be the son of the woman who’d taken his name from him? The thing kept trying to speak, and all Kabru could do was force out ‘no, no, no,’ through a throat clogging with spores and snot. In the end, none of it would matter. Immobilized prey was immobilized prey whether by fear or by rapture, and soon Kabru would be dead and the most he could feel was sorry.
April 7, 2025 at 10:46 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
the internet is still worth it
April 6, 2025 at 5:12 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
madam.
April 5, 2025 at 4:14 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
April 4, 2025 at 6:45 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
Updated/reached the midpoint of my Canary Kabru AU, complete with Kabru flashback designed to hurt you. #kabumisu
First chapter: archiveofourown.org/works/602553...
Latest chapter (12): archiveofourown.org/works/602553...
For all Kabru knew, he could be the last person left alive in the whole world. Why, then, did he shrink at the sound of grown up bodies treading in the dust? He could hear them clearly. The last of the cries had died away and the wind was still, and Kabru had learned fast that monsters sounded totally different from humans when they moved. He’d made the mistake, dared to hope, exactly once. It was because he knew deep in him that they wouldn’t care like he cared. There was no shock when they wrenched him away, their fine-boned hands turning hard. Kabru had no fear of elves, had not even acquired the dual resentment and admiration he would later recall and recognize in adults, but he hated these people. If he had been big and strong he would have torn them apart, or tried. But he wasn’t. Outside, inside, he was small and frail for all he’d been brave. What they saw - a kicking, bawling child that couldn’t escape a firm hand - would belie his rage. What he saw would be the end of his whole world as the rubble came alive with the shuffling and padding of the beasts lying in wait. They would pick her apart like a joint of mutton, which Kabru knew, even if the most he saw before the darkness of a heavy cape cover his eyes was the first bloodless bites as they prepared to drag her away.
February 9, 2025 at 7:32 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
February 7, 2025 at 3:36 AM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
When someone you don’t care for finds a new hyperfixation
February 6, 2025 at 11:18 PM
falsemilkbun.bsky.social
February 5, 2025 at 4:17 AM