I wrote my masters dissertation on Unforgiven. I think it’s a great film, but it’s inherently a commentary on a lot of the western genre so it’s kind of a western for western watchers.

It is still some of Eastwood’s best work.

This complaint is usually rooted not in too much exposition - it’s in boring exposition.

Your interrogations and investigations should be at least as compelling and exciting as your chases and fights.

When exposition feels like drama, the audience won’t even notice they’re learning about the world

Thanks Chad; really appreciate the shoutout! It was a pleasure to read your work and I’m stoked to see Fairy Dust when it’s released.

You can dive into a new project without diving straight into the writing. Stare into space about it for a few days. Daydream. Imagine scenes, visualise vistas, hold conversations with yourself. Get excited about what might be.

#scriptsky

Excellent, then hit me up if you have something getting off the ground! Would love to join in whenever I can.

The right person will love it, but the right person probably also has an inbox with a dozen other scripts they love in there, several of which will be a tight 90 pages.

The right person also then has to convince investors, who will only see 140+ pages at $10,000 and up per page in shooting costs.

143 is likely too much. Anyone who reads a lot of scripts (competitions, festivals, development, producers) will groan at that page count.

Films are roughly 1 page = 1 minute, so you’re talking nearly 2 and a half hours here. Consider your genre with that in mind.

I work a weird shift pattern in my day job but would be up for joining when I can.

📽️

Be happy to read and do up some notes.

What about something like:

“A pacifist and leading physicist flees Nazi Germany and battles to keep her research alive, not to learn that her greatest breakthrough will pave the way for mankind’s deadliest weapon.”

Sorry for sporadic responses, am at work right now.

I like it better, but still feels like it’s lacking antagonism. Like what is her primary antagonist here? The system? Herself? Poverty is okay but feels a little abstract, and is also unrelated to the split between her pacifism and the results of her work, which then feels a little tacked on.

I’d drop the Oppenheimer Cinematic Universe part - it reads as a gag in what I think is a serious pitch. Add an active verb too, for my money.

“True stories of the spies, scientists and soldiers who fought to prevent the Nazis getting the atom bomb.”

Maybe make it “fought and died” for added drama

Make the antagonism more direct maybe? Something like she “struggles against [threat] to complete her research”.

Rewrite them. A few years down the line and a few projects later, you can often see weaknesses you couldn’t before.

Alternatively, pull them apart for scraps. Recycle a great scene into something else or use that great line of dialogue you loved so much.

Hi I write scifi, horror, drama and any other kind of screenplay I have an idea for.

I’m also a script analyst so please hit me up if you need feedback or ideas where to improve your stuff or where to take it next!

Sure thing, thanks!