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The Daily Davester (satire)
@dailydavester.bsky.social

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Snap elections would be great.

Just imagining Elon trying to quickly get $300 million out of an ATM.
April 28, 2025 at 6:56 PM
"Strategic Uncertainty" is the new way to call someone a "Complete Moron."
April 27, 2025 at 9:43 PM
April 27, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Facilitate? Trump couldn't facilitate the ordering of a Big Mac with no pickles.
April 24, 2025 at 1:48 PM
It's kinda sad when your thumb doesn't go up as high as it used to.
April 18, 2025 at 12:02 PM
If panic attacks were always deductible, I could've paid a total of $0 in federal taxes every year since the 90s. Like Trump.
April 15, 2025 at 11:14 AM
I'm sorry, but we're so far gone that Jon lightly poking fun at this evil is just not funny. There's no comedy in this anymore; it's moved into the tragedy category. And is getting worse by the day.
April 15, 2025 at 6:27 AM
What Trump hates 2nd most: people with morals.
April 9, 2025 at 10:32 AM
By the end of today, my retirement account will have enough money for 12 wonderful days of retirement. So I've got that goin' for me.
April 7, 2025 at 12:57 PM
The best financial advice he could've given his clients is, don't vote for Trump.
April 7, 2025 at 12:23 PM
It was hard enough going to school when my worst fear was the thorny hall monitor.
April 7, 2025 at 12:19 PM
This doesn't include the voices already in his head.
April 7, 2025 at 12:14 PM
If he could also talk to a good therapist, that'd be fantastic.
April 7, 2025 at 12:03 PM
If you have a phobia about seeing dark red arrows pointing downwards, today might be a good day to turn off everything and read a good book.
April 7, 2025 at 12:02 PM
If you have a phobia about seeing dark red arrows pointing downwards, today might be a good day to turn off everything and read a good book.
April 7, 2025 at 11:59 AM
If you have a phobia about seeing dark red arrows pointing downwards, today would be a good day to turn off everything and read a good book.
April 7, 2025 at 11:57 AM
Elon will soon be wearing an item of clothing that reads, "I laid off a million federal workers and all I got was a bankrupt car company and this t-shirt."
April 3, 2025 at 8:26 AM
April 2, 2025 at 7:32 PM
Would love to see Elon duct taped to one of his SpaceX rockets and sent to Mars. Then he can buy elections there.
April 1, 2025 at 2:41 PM
Wondering how many 5-Hour Energy bottles he managed to cram into his suit coat.
April 1, 2025 at 2:30 PM
I wouldn't trust JD Vance to give me honest directions to the end of the block.
April 1, 2025 at 6:07 AM
I love it. And it just made me realize why I suddenly stopped buying oranges in 2016.
March 31, 2025 at 11:14 PM
March 31, 2025 at 7:32 PM
That said, those ex-wives are not fans of his "trick shots."
March 30, 2025 at 6:20 PM
He doesn't have anywhere near the lure that Trump has with MAGAs, and a lot of 'em don't trust him. If Trump keeled over from a heart attack from all that fast food, those conspiracy nuts would blame JD Vance -- because, of course -- so it would be easier for R's in Congress to go against him.
March 30, 2025 at 5:47 PM