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Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

Book XXV will absolutely NOT be included in Christopher Nolan’s adaptation of the material. For viewer safety. Sorry, folks.

substack.com/@chafic/note...

Chafic LaRochelle (@chafic)

You don’t need to read Ancient Greek to recognize when something has gone terribly wrong in translation. What follows is a routine editorial correspondence.

substack.com

January 29, 2026 at 6:13 PM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

My favourite club was Underachievers Anonymous. I’ve never really stopped applying their lessons.

open.substack.com/pub/chafic/p...

The High School Clubs Nobody Asked For

A Retrospective Study in Organized Aimlessness

open.substack.com

January 25, 2026 at 3:25 PM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

Few surrealists come close to Ocampo in terms of vibrance and depth of illusion.

Visions of Quixote (1989) is a personal favourite.

Plus, it pairs quite favourably with 100µg of lysergic acid diethylamide. Or so I’ve been told…

January 25, 2026 at 3:45 AM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

“The year vomits itself up anew, and the vomit seamlessly assumes the place of the devoured.”

—Sublunar, Harald Voetmann

January 24, 2026 at 6:16 PM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

I know, I know—another goddamn essay about the trolley problem. Except this one doesn’t stop where it’s supposed to.
open.substack.com/pub/chafic/p...

A Practical Guide to the Trolley Problem for the Existentially Perplexed

Including Several Necessary Clarifications, Long Overdue

open.substack.com

January 21, 2026 at 1:13 AM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

I regret many things in my life. Most of them saved me 15%.

New essay about saving money and losing other things.

open.substack.com/pub/chafic/p...

I Regret Every Discount Code I’ve Ever Applied

A brief accounting of small savings and permanent damage

open.substack.com

January 19, 2026 at 3:05 AM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

Reading The Singularity (Il grande ritratto) by Dino Buzzati has been a nice surprise.

January 16, 2026 at 2:01 PM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

I don’t often post about politics or current events. But when I do, it’s usually because the absurdism writes itself.

"Black, brown, yellow, or white—we're itching to leave you red all over!"

open.substack.com/pub/chafic/p...

I Am the Government’s ICE Memes, and I’m Here to Make This Go Down Easy

Black, brown, yellow, or white—we're itching to leave you red all over!

open.substack.com

January 10, 2026 at 6:23 PM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

I appear to have a medically demonstrable allergy to original thinking.

New essay: Every Time I Almost Have an Original Thought, I Get Diarrhea
open.substack.com/pub/chafic/p...

Every Time I Almost Have an Original Thought, I Get Diarrhea

On the Metabolic Cost of New Ideas

open.substack.com

January 9, 2026 at 6:40 PM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

Am I overthinking this? Or did Homer warn us about AI when he wrote about the Sirens? Creatures that flatter our vanity, promise total knowledge, and leave behind nothing but prisoners, addicts, and bones.
@emilyrcwilson.bsky.social

January 7, 2026 at 4:45 PM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

Small correction to @theresthistory.bsky.social series on Justinian and Theodora: there was, in fact, an entire department dedicated to sanding down imperial abs and smearing dung on monuments that felt “too holy.” Understandable this didn’t make the cut.

open.substack.com/pub/chafic/p...

Frequently Asked Questions Concerning Emperor Justinian’s Absolute Non-Divinity

A clarifying memorandum for all new appointees to the Bureau of Imperial Moral Hygiene

open.substack.com

January 5, 2026 at 1:41 AM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

Worth a read for anyone interested in:

• AI safety

• mental health tech

• legal accountability

• the sandwich as a latent structure of the self

Happy to answer questions within the limits of the settlement.

open.substack.com/pub/chafic/p...

The Sandwich is the Self: Excerpts from the FreudBot™ Lawsuit

Because a sandwich is never just a sandwich

open.substack.com

December 30, 2025 at 8:00 PM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

This year, as we spend time with loved ones, pray for world peace, and covet the latest gaming console, there should be one question at the fore of everyone’s mind:

Is my partner cheating on me?

Merry Christmas to all.

open.substack.com/pub/chafic/p...

Quiz: Is Your Partner Cheating On You Or Are They Actually Santa Claus?

A Helpful Diagnostic for the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

open.substack.com

December 25, 2025 at 9:07 PM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

Ladies and gentlemen, this article contains important information about exits, oxygen masks, emotional abandonment, and why loyalty programs last longer than marriages.

Please read carefully.

Failure to do so will not prevent turbulence. ✈️

open.substack.com/pub/chafic/p...

Your In-Flight Safety Briefing Has Been Expanded to Include My Divorce

For Demonstration Purposes Only

open.substack.com

December 22, 2025 at 3:34 AM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

Pretty sure my therapist’s notes now include phrases like “meat API,” “emotionally adequate,” and a named anxiety with deliverables.

Out of professional curiosity (and self-preservation), I tried to reconstruct the rest.

open.substack.com/pub/chafic/p...

What I Assume My Therapist Is Definitely Writing Down About Me

Preliminary Findings on Why I Shouldn’t Be Left Unsupervised

open.substack.com

December 19, 2025 at 4:11 PM

Chafic LaRo

@chafic-larochelle.bsky.social

At some point you stop fixing small problems and start working around them. You tell yourself these things are actually “fine” because dealing with them would take time and energy you simply don’t have.

I made a list of mine.

It got out of hand.

open.substack.com/pub/chafic/p...