(had to search the meaning of that phrase on know your meme) WAIT!!!!!!!! OWN IT!!!!!!! THE CREDIT DOES GO TO YOU AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

its just fun to think of the same song at different points in my life

i am trying very hard to trust people i promise. but it is also very hard to fight the part of my head thats immediately like "well ok they dont mean that". omfg the social comparison i was doing in highschool was so fucking dire dude NOT THE LONGTERM EFFECTS!!!!!!!!!!!

anyway going thru my pronouns page again is making me realize i just straight up cannot internalize compliments on my physical appearance HELPPPP for some reason i always think ppl just say them to be nice and dont............. actually mean them.................... BYE

a classmate also referred to me with mamsir in chat earlier n i have no idea if she just saw i go by they/them but good lird. the gender affirmation

ik love languages arent too psychologically founded but even so its a nice way to think of how ive been perceiving my relationships this whole time

bc tia ended up ~mysteriously resolving~ the attack when eden was passed out and her refusing to divulge further details on how she did it (it was w her siren powers) just pisses him offfffffff so not only is it a pride thing but also a trust thing i guess. makes him realize how secretive tia's been

eden knows tia has seniority over him (even if he thinks its just a couple years) and he respects her greatly for it, AND IN HIS DEFENSE HE THOUGHT TIA WAS GONNA DIE SO ALL THE MORE REASON FOR HIM TO BE RECKLESS IN HIS EYES, but he's still hot headed and cant take feeling "one-upped" like that+

maybe a sexism L on eden's part but idk its so flavorful thru the lens of him being trans. he's so insistent on doing manly things it comes off as him trying to overcompensate for the fact he wasnt born as one. it feels humiliating and insulting to not be able to live up to that manly standard