Or

Buggy accidentally becomes a father figure and grapples with certain realizations that a red-head’s reappearance has unleashed upon his person (after a lot of suffering for a certain child he does not care about at all).

…Except he’s also the only thing standing between a helpless infant and the world that wants him dead.
Somebody’s gotta keep the kid from getting murdered. And if the world thinks it can punish a baby just for existing? Then the world can choke on Buggy’s detachable dick.

Buggy never asked to be responsible for Captain’s kid. He’s got his own flashy life ahead of him that doesn’t involve getting caught up in government sanctioned genocide.

This background comes to a head when Luffy breaks into Impel Down and happens on a guy that looks really familiar even though they've never met... it takes Buggy mentioning wanting to help save Ace because he helped raise the damn kid for Luffy to finally go CLOWN! YOU'RE THE WEIRD CLOWN!

Examples of said Background Hilarity:
1. Ace holds a funeral for Buggy. Luffy is forced to attend even though he never met this weird clown Ace is obsessed with.
2. Ace builds a memorial shrine for Buggy in their Tree Fort/Ship thing. Luffy is forced to pay respects to a weird clown he never met.

Buggy becomes an Uncle/Dad figure to Ace. As a result Ace is a mega Buggy Fanboy like Luffy is for Shanks. Unfortunately when Ace gets a little brother he wants to introduce Buggy to (Luffy) Buggy "dies" and Ace is devastated. Cue hilarity in the background.

We all know that Buggy has no concept of "normal childhood" he grew up on the Oro. So cursing around an eight-year-old is not something he sees as frowned upon behavior.

Fighting a tiger alone in the Dawn Forrest however.....

The tiger growls, muscles coiling as it prepares to pounce. Sweat trickles down Buggy’s neck.

“Hey that’s mine!” Ace yells, skidding up beside him, pipe in hand. “I don’t need your help!”

Buggy nearly drops his jaw.

“YOU’RE FIGHTING A GRANDLINE-CLASS TIGER WITH A FUCKING PIPE?!”

Some key information about the fic.
1. Buggy saves Ace from Baterilla
2. Buggy orchestrates Garps adoption of Ace from the shadows (Garp doesn't know Ace is Rogers Kid)
3. Buggy is presumed dead for 10 years when really hes just in Impel Down
4. Shanks is GOING THROUGH IT

Basically this AU is "What if a Roger Pirate found out about Ace first" and since I'm obsessed with Buggy it turned into "Buggy's Baby Heist" which then turned into this massive canon divergence fic. I've already started writing it and its at over 20k words AND THERE ISN'T EVEN ANY SHUGGY IN IT YET

My little brother has a hysterical memory of his big sister bursting into his room at 2am crying because "HE DIED" he was supportive as fuck eventhough he still has no idea what that was about.

This fic is an AU that has been building in my head since I was watching marineford... as it came out... yes I have been on weekly releases that long.