Love this song end to end. All the Aussie lagers are on me. What was he referring to? Castlemaine XXXX?

Red wine on carrots? My mum would have called the police

Boil the vegetables sufficiently in advance so that all taste and nutrients have long since departed. Beautiful British home cooked food. My childhood was full of it. I’m so grateful for the garlic press.

It’s not really for me to say

I wrote “bum” in the condensation of the parish church notice board. I never expected six uniformed police officers to turn up the door.

That’s a lovely album despite the literal cover art

Where once here stood a van selling artisan coffee there’s now a pasting table with phone chargers and tea towels on it sold by someone’s shifty looking nan.

The fact that the SWP were calling for calm. Thats beautiful.

Imagine if she relaunched though. I think she’d sound like a Carvery Dido.

I think you’ll find that’s like making a distinction between urine and wee wee.

No room for Princess Diana on the front page. They hate Britain

There’s a small gift shop selling racist shortbread.