Dude
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advertence.bsky.social
Dude
@advertence.bsky.social
9.3K followers 1.4K following 13K posts
Meh
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advertence.bsky.social
Sir, I don't understand. Who needs a knife in a nuke fight anyway? All you gotta do is push a button, sir. PUT YOUR HAND ON THAT WALL! The enemy can not push a button... if you disable his hand.
November 28, 2025 at 2:26 AM
advertence.bsky.social
On the plus side, I am completely immune to flash-bang grenades. - Helen Keller.
November 27, 2025 at 9:41 PM
advertence.bsky.social
You go through life, you try to be nice to people, you struggle with the urge to punch 'em in the face, and for what? To be treated like dirt. Well, I'm better than dirt! Well, most kinds of dirt. I mean, not that fancy, store-bought dirt. That stuff's loaded with nutrients. I can't compete with that stuff
November 27, 2025 at 8:26 PM
advertence.bsky.social
Life is suffering It is hard The world is cursed. But still, you find reasons to keep living.
November 27, 2025 at 7:51 AM
advertence.bsky.social
I feel like my old self again. Totally inadequate, insecure, paranoid, neurotic... It's a pleasure.
November 27, 2025 at 7:48 AM
advertence.bsky.social
whenever my hands are too far away I use my toes to pet the cat
November 27, 2025 at 7:45 AM
advertence.bsky.social
Advancements in necromancy finally allowed Morris an opportunity to enjoy his retirement.
November 27, 2025 at 7:43 AM
advertence.bsky.social
Toddlers: [can't tie shoes, have to wear Velcro instead] Toddlers when they see a tablet: Tank in front of his screens driving the Matrix
November 27, 2025 at 7:43 AM
advertence.bsky.social
Two doctors at the bird hospital discussing a patient THAT KID IN THERE SHOVED THREE CARROTS, TWO CELERY STICKS, AND A HALF AN ONION UP HIS BUTT. STUPID "THANKSGIVING CHALLENGE."
November 27, 2025 at 5:28 AM
advertence.bsky.social
You've just died.
The 6th picture in your phone gallery is what killed you.
November 27, 2025 at 4:11 AM
advertence.bsky.social
I have to say weird stuff or I will explode
November 27, 2025 at 1:16 AM
advertence.bsky.social
Let's open those neural floodgates.
November 27, 2025 at 1:15 AM
advertence.bsky.social
💀
November 26, 2025 at 5:56 AM
advertence.bsky.social
November 26, 2025 at 3:41 AM
advertence.bsky.social
Traditional pipe smoking gnome Born to esoteric Forced to society
November 26, 2025 at 3:39 AM
advertence.bsky.social
me running away from the plans i agreed with when i was in a good mood like some kind of blurry black shape
November 24, 2025 at 12:09 AM
advertence.bsky.social
Are you turning into a WEREWOLF? KNOW THE SIGNS OF A LYCANTHROPY ATTACK! THE FUZZ PROBABLE CLAWS -Watch for sudden fur -Be aware of wet dog smell -Pay attention to shedding PAWS FOR THOUGHT -Monitor talon growth -Don't ignore hairy knuckles -Consult your manicurist NEW WAG, RED FLAG
November 23, 2025 at 11:03 PM
advertence.bsky.social
WORF'S OWN® PRUNE JUICE ORALE POR YOUR SAFETY PASTTUIOTES From the heart of Qo'noS to your kitchen table - Worf's Own° Prune Juice is the honorable way to maintain a warrior's digestive strength. Packed with the power of prunes and fortified with Klingon pride, this isn't just juice — it's a battle cry for your bowels. TORES ONA & Strengthens your constitution (and SHIT LIKE A WARRIOR your regularity) Conquers digestive sluggishness with honor • Bold flavor fit for the fiercest stomach When your body demands glory, don't reach for any ordinary juce: TODAY IS A GOOD DAY TO GO! - -- WORF'S OWN - SHIT LIKE A WARRIOR.
November 22, 2025 at 5:15 PM
advertence.bsky.social
schmox @IvoryGazelle Wind chimes, but it's hot dogs. The soothing sound of wind meat
November 22, 2025 at 4:22 PM
advertence.bsky.social
Ohaidere!
Bug eyed elderly Boston terrier
November 22, 2025 at 3:25 AM
advertence.bsky.social
Parents promising: WE WILL NOT MESS YOU UP / LIKE OUR PARENTS MESSED US UP What their promises end up looking like: A WHOLE NEW KIND OF FUCKED UP
November 21, 2025 at 7:07 PM
advertence.bsky.social
the horrors persists but so do we motherfucker ~ wee little medieval chicken man chimera
November 21, 2025 at 7:05 PM
advertence.bsky.social
HELP! I'M UNHAPPY OKAY, HERE'S GRADUAL CHANGE THROUGH DAILY HABITS NO THANKS, 1 WAS LOOKING FOR DRAMATIC
November 21, 2025 at 7:04 PM
advertence.bsky.social
November 20, 2025 at 6:55 PM
advertence.bsky.social
Listen, and understand. Mariah Carey is out there. She can't be reasoned with, she can't be bargained with. She doesn't feel pity or fear or remorse, and she absolutely will not stop, ever. Because all she wants for Christmas is you! ~ John Connor
November 20, 2025 at 2:18 AM